(no subject)
I have been taking my meds at random hours, or not taking them at all. This is ruined my sleep schedule (I woke up at 7pm today, after 14 hours of sleep). And I'm a wreck, emotionally and mentally; angry, sad, violent, etc.
I don't want to ever hurt myself again. I'm almost at 8 months. But I've been doing it for so many years, I feel like it's inevitable that I'll start again. I know this is a terrible attitude to have, because it creates a self-fulfilling prophecy. People believe in me, and I know I believe in me, so I can't let my fears decide the future.
This weekend was very nice. Caitlyn was an excellent hostess, and generous enough to brave pouring rain and hunger so we could have lunch at Alice's Tea House. I met a few of her friends again, and a few new ones, and I got really good vibes from them. We spent three hours in the tea place talking, which was super. I feel so comfortable with Caitlyn, and she's such a good person. I also feel like my self-esteem rises when I'm around her. Diane Arbus=amazing, though sad-making. I also saw Klee and William Kentridge, which were very good although not amazing. I really like Brooklyn, even though I've seen so little of it. Best part about the weekend was I spent less than $50 total. Rock.
I need to stop being cheap and buy nail clippers.
I got a good amount of reading done over the weekend. There's still more, but I'm staying afloat.
I am a hungry hungry hippo.
Can I just say that watching plastic surgery shows makes me really really really not want to have plastic surgery?
I don't want to ever hurt myself again. I'm almost at 8 months. But I've been doing it for so many years, I feel like it's inevitable that I'll start again. I know this is a terrible attitude to have, because it creates a self-fulfilling prophecy. People believe in me, and I know I believe in me, so I can't let my fears decide the future.
This weekend was very nice. Caitlyn was an excellent hostess, and generous enough to brave pouring rain and hunger so we could have lunch at Alice's Tea House. I met a few of her friends again, and a few new ones, and I got really good vibes from them. We spent three hours in the tea place talking, which was super. I feel so comfortable with Caitlyn, and she's such a good person. I also feel like my self-esteem rises when I'm around her. Diane Arbus=amazing, though sad-making. I also saw Klee and William Kentridge, which were very good although not amazing. I really like Brooklyn, even though I've seen so little of it. Best part about the weekend was I spent less than $50 total. Rock.
I need to stop being cheap and buy nail clippers.
I got a good amount of reading done over the weekend. There's still more, but I'm staying afloat.
I am a hungry hungry hippo.
Can I just say that watching plastic surgery shows makes me really really really not want to have plastic surgery?