My grandma's death...
I'm going through a really tough time right now. These are the two bulletins I have posted. I don't have the energy to write more, so I'm going to just copy them...
My grandmother passed away tonight. When I got the call, I was speechless. As the night went on, it got worse.
I am thankful to everyone who has been there for me tonight to talk to. And Shannon, Lizbett and Jeff for being there for me to have a shoulder to cry on. You don't know how much that means to me.
I'm going back home tomorrow. I don't know how long I'll be there, most likely until Tuesday, but while I'm home, please don't beg me to hang out. I have enough to deal with without everyone trying to help me. If I need help, I will ask you for it. But thanks in advance.
I'm going to try to get some sleep before I drive home tomorrow.
So, I wasn't sure that I was supposed to be telling people...but I talked to my mom and she said it was fine. I just need to get it out, need to talk about it. I keep hearing people say they are sorry, and it was just her time. It kills me, because I know it wasn't her time. That is the reason I need to get this out. I can't stand the feeling I get every time I hear that.
The reason my grandma died wasn't of natural causes. When I found out, I thought I was dreaming. She committed suicide.... God. I hate that I even have to type that. This has been so hard on all of us. My 73 year old grandma. We didn't even know she was depressed. Why? Why did she do it? What could we have done to stop it? It was planned, but for how long. Its just...so hard. I don't even know what to do anymore. I don't feel like doing anything.
Has anyone else had a family member commit suicide? If so, I would love to talk to you. This is really hard to grasp, I don't even quite believe it yet.
Thank you to everyone for their support.
My grandmother passed away tonight. When I got the call, I was speechless. As the night went on, it got worse.
I am thankful to everyone who has been there for me tonight to talk to. And Shannon, Lizbett and Jeff for being there for me to have a shoulder to cry on. You don't know how much that means to me.
I'm going back home tomorrow. I don't know how long I'll be there, most likely until Tuesday, but while I'm home, please don't beg me to hang out. I have enough to deal with without everyone trying to help me. If I need help, I will ask you for it. But thanks in advance.
I'm going to try to get some sleep before I drive home tomorrow.
So, I wasn't sure that I was supposed to be telling people...but I talked to my mom and she said it was fine. I just need to get it out, need to talk about it. I keep hearing people say they are sorry, and it was just her time. It kills me, because I know it wasn't her time. That is the reason I need to get this out. I can't stand the feeling I get every time I hear that.
The reason my grandma died wasn't of natural causes. When I found out, I thought I was dreaming. She committed suicide.... God. I hate that I even have to type that. This has been so hard on all of us. My 73 year old grandma. We didn't even know she was depressed. Why? Why did she do it? What could we have done to stop it? It was planned, but for how long. Its just...so hard. I don't even know what to do anymore. I don't feel like doing anything.
Has anyone else had a family member commit suicide? If so, I would love to talk to you. This is really hard to grasp, I don't even quite believe it yet.
Thank you to everyone for their support.