(no subject)
Tonight was fun. Hungout with Jack and Joesph. Yesterday I bought a new controller and Madden 2005 bitches. Too much fun. But yeah we had fun and shit. Thennn I hungout with my Wif. Fun like always.
But I cant sleep. Its almost 1 and Im never up this late on school nights anymore. My parents fogot to pick up more sleeping pills for me, so all Im doing is thinking about you, Brian. I cant sleep, its all going through my head. Im thinking about Brian, how the special days we spent together will be like next year. Like the day we started dating, Valentines day, Easter, his bday, then prom, cause we were going to go together last year, but couldnt, and how the year of his death will be, and even the 6 months coming up next month. It keeps running through my head and I hate it. I wish he was here so we could spend those times together again, but he's not, and I hate saying that. I love you Brian. Why did you have to let him go so early? Why? I dont even know what to believe anymore. Ive lost all faith and hate to say that, but I dont know what to expect anymore. He's gone, but I hate saying it. I've lost the first guy I was falling in love with, the first guy that I never felt so close to, and never wanted to leave me.
And also, I have college shit to think about. I have to finish my apps. and turn them in soon so I can find out where the hell im going in december. Hopefully Ill be able to go to the same college as Meg. My rock, cause if not, I have no fucking clue what Ill do. And I need to talk to bitch Miller about some shit, and I just need to do well in school. I turn 18 in 7 months, I graduate in like, 8.5 months. Me, graduating, I cant believe it. And I wanna make this summer one that I'll never forget. A great summer to spend with my awesome fucking friends. Memories that will never leave me.
I have so many doctor appts. this week. And im nervous for the bone doctor. I see him Thursday, and Ill be able to find out when I can go back to work, then hopefully find out when I can get my lost wages and get a car. And get a clue to see if I will need surgery again, or if he still isnt sure. adjasdfkadfk.
I hate this, I fucking hate all of this. Im thankful to have some of the best fucking friends that have been right by my side this whole time. and for my family for helping out too.
Fuck you David Russel. Burn in fucking hell. Go where you belong you son of a fucking bitch. I hate you. Fuck the Russel family. Hell will pay for all of you.
But I cant sleep. Its almost 1 and Im never up this late on school nights anymore. My parents fogot to pick up more sleeping pills for me, so all Im doing is thinking about you, Brian. I cant sleep, its all going through my head. Im thinking about Brian, how the special days we spent together will be like next year. Like the day we started dating, Valentines day, Easter, his bday, then prom, cause we were going to go together last year, but couldnt, and how the year of his death will be, and even the 6 months coming up next month. It keeps running through my head and I hate it. I wish he was here so we could spend those times together again, but he's not, and I hate saying that. I love you Brian. Why did you have to let him go so early? Why? I dont even know what to believe anymore. Ive lost all faith and hate to say that, but I dont know what to expect anymore. He's gone, but I hate saying it. I've lost the first guy I was falling in love with, the first guy that I never felt so close to, and never wanted to leave me.
And also, I have college shit to think about. I have to finish my apps. and turn them in soon so I can find out where the hell im going in december. Hopefully Ill be able to go to the same college as Meg. My rock, cause if not, I have no fucking clue what Ill do. And I need to talk to bitch Miller about some shit, and I just need to do well in school. I turn 18 in 7 months, I graduate in like, 8.5 months. Me, graduating, I cant believe it. And I wanna make this summer one that I'll never forget. A great summer to spend with my awesome fucking friends. Memories that will never leave me.
I have so many doctor appts. this week. And im nervous for the bone doctor. I see him Thursday, and Ill be able to find out when I can go back to work, then hopefully find out when I can get my lost wages and get a car. And get a clue to see if I will need surgery again, or if he still isnt sure. adjasdfkadfk.
I hate this, I fucking hate all of this. Im thankful to have some of the best fucking friends that have been right by my side this whole time. and for my family for helping out too.
Fuck you David Russel. Burn in fucking hell. Go where you belong you son of a fucking bitch. I hate you. Fuck the Russel family. Hell will pay for all of you.