PS:

[aesummerlove69]

ps: i forgot this and just remembered. in the beginning of october we had to put tigger down. it all happened so fast. one day he was laying around so we took him to the vet the next morning, the decided to take some chest xrays, and discovered that he had a lymphoma. there was fluid around his heart and his lung capacity had been reduced to a 1/3 of its original size. they gave us some medicine for 10 days and said at the end of the 10 days to bring him back and see whether he would live or if he'd have to be put down. after 7 or 8 days he was getting really bad and they said he'd just either have to die on his own or they'd have to put him down. sunday night, he collapsed and monday afternoon mom picked me up from practice early and said we had to go. i knew it was for tigg and was just frozen. we almost got a ticket on the way home bc mom was speeding. we picked tigg and kimmy up and went over to the vet. alex was still asleep so i picked him up and went in with mom and tiggy...they gave him this pain killer shot and then the pink anesthesia and said to just wait and he'd be gone in like 5 minutes...mom sat w/ him bc i was holding alex, i really didnt want to cry in front of anyone, so i didnt say anything when mom offered to hold alex so i could be with him. i wanted to hold onto him while he died but i didnt want to in front of mom and the vet. i never got to hold him as he was dying. after mom took alex, i just sat there. by myself w/ tiggy. i still dont feel like i really got to say goodbye. i just started talking to him and started crying. i got tears on his coat and rubbed them in, he was still warm all over. i said my goodbyes. i still cant believe that tom didnt want to tell annie. it was her dog. but i guess it didnt matter bc even though mom told her, she didnt come home. they said it would only take 2 weeks to cremate him but we just got his ashes back tuesday. we're going to spread his ashes over the hay field because we're going to fence it in soon and he loved to be with the horses so we figured that would be appropriate. he spent so much time outside that it didnt feel right to just bury him. after we came home, maddie was lost. she had no idea where her best friend had gone and just sort of wandered around. even doc was lost. chloe and kovax came over looking for him and just were like umm...okay where is he...they havent been over much lately. i think the saddest part is that we know biff is going to die soon with his diabetes and all and then there will only be maddie left. tigger was supposed to be alex's dog. ive thought about if we should get another dog and then felt like i was betraying tigg by even thinking that. it still hurts when i think of him and i'm sure i'll cry when we spread his ashes. i kind of want to go see linley about all this because they had to put precious down last year so she understands everything. i dont think i've told her about tigg yet. i know she'll be sad. no one had told the family down here either so that was sad.

but enough of this. i'm off to bed. i'll write when i get home. kimmy wants the computer. xoxo <3 theresa