Not Too Late [YamaChiShii] Chapter 6 [Final]
Title: Not Too LateAuthor: aemrith
Pairing: Chinen Yuri/Shida Mirai, Yamada Ryosuke/Shida Mirai
Rating: PG
Genre: Romance, Friendship, Drama, Angst(?), Tragedy(???) *whacked*
Warning: THIS IS REALLY A BITTERSWEET FIC! Please do not hate me... T^T
Summary: "You just have to let go..."
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Mirai held onto that tiny piece of paper Ryosuke has left inside her mailbox… It was the last one… Before that tragic night that completely changed how their lives were currently running. She had kept this one close to her all the time - for among the others, it was the only one that just made her feel like this truly reflects everything she and Ryosuke has.
Now at this moment - the lines on this tiny piece of paper keep playing over and over inside her head.
Clutching onto it tighter, she placed it over her chest as she fights off the tears that are so badly screaming behind her shut eyelids.
“I’d do anything just to see you smile again.”
These were the words simply scribbled on that paper. True, it was nothing special. Yet with these, Mirai has realized the thing she has been hiding to herself, to Yuri, to the world.
Ever since that faithful day he didn’t show up… Mirai couldn’t recall an instant that she truly smiled.
Sure she shared some with her friends, but deep down, she knows that her smiles were all just a cover-up for the pain that still lingers.
Ryosuke was not to be forgiven - that was what her mind was shouting, all those months… that past year. She cried every time she hears herself. It was just pure agony to contradict and convince yourself over something you don’t even know how to understand.
And right now… Mirai brushed off a tear that eventually escaped. Perhaps, it was just something in the past. Something she should just forget.
There was a knock on her door, and Mirai took a deep breath as she fought off the tears, and tried to say “Come in…” without letting anyone know how she’s been doing. She wants to be strong at this very moment.
The door made that click sound, and Mirai knows that a person has entered. She didn’t really have to turn around to see who it was for she knows, that this person, only Yuri, he’s the only one who knows just when and where he could find her. “…Hey…” he uttered, ever so casually Mirai felt like her tears were gaining a different kind of strength.
She looked back and saw Yuri, ever so beautiful the way she has always seen him. In his black formal clothes, he looked exquisite - but it cannot hide the pain. This person may just well be the most perfect one out there - she wanted to kill herself sometimes whenever she remembers how much she has and is probably still hurting him. Mirai took a deep breath, still clutching on that piece of paper.
“…You have to get ready soon.” He uttered, moving towards her. It’s amazing how despite everything that has happened, Yuri still manages to be his usual self in front of her.
She just sat there though; her feet propped up, her knees close to her chest - just sitting there like a child in that couch on this room. She hugged her knees closer, embracing herself and Yuri took a deep breath, looking at a garment she’s supposed to be wearing. She should be prepared by now.
As silence grows, Yuri decides to sit beside her. When he did so, Mirai puts her feet down and hugs her jacket closer, that paper still in her hands. “…It’s time.” he uttered, fighting the urge to hold her face.
“…I …don’t” she uttered, clearly her voice is quivering. “I don’t want to let go…” and with that Yuri just sat closer to her, their shoulders touching. Soon he raised his hand just holding onto her cheeks and pulled her ever so gently so that her head would rest on his shoulder.
“…You forget and you move on.” He uttered rather straightforwardly - but Mirai can feel the tension in his chest. She could hear his heart beating ever so loudly yet they weren’t fast. “You’re stronger than this…” he whispered, letting out that tiny frustration she knows to be building inside of him.
And yes, just like always, he is her secure base - with him, she is safe. Mirai has asked Yuri to leave her numerous times because she feels like she’s being unfair to him. “Why do you always have to be the one to comfort me, yet I’ve done nothing but hurt you.” He can hear her fighting her sobs away.
Yuri closed his eyes, as if he knows what she’s going to say next.
“Leave me Yuri…” she whispered, the pain in her words were excruciating to the both of them. “You’re not supposed to make yourself suffer like this…”
But he wanted nothing more than to be with her - no matter what. Yuri took a deep breath, leaned on his back, still his eyes closed. “I don’t care.” He spoke, Mirai hushing her sobs as she waits for what else he has to say, “You’ll only hurt me more by asking me to leave.” With that, Mirai just let out her cries and Yuri, ever so sensitive about her, couldn’t stand it and just pulled her into an embrace. “Don’t you dare worry about me…” he sounded threatening, but really he’s just frustrated that at the moment - and perhaps for the very first time - she is crying because of him. “…You just worry about making yourself happy…” he tightened his hold, tears just blurring his sight, and he kissed her forehead ever so gently. “So let go…” Mirai looked up, he brushed her tears and forced a smile - it was weak, yet Mirai just kept crying. “Let go and start again.”
~~~
It was that tiny church, but the ambience today was rather different. Mirai looked around, all these people that were dear, gathered once again.
It was all silent, and she took a moment before stepping onto that aisle she ever dreaded to step on about a year ago. This time, it’s all different.
She held onto that piece of paper in her hand, as she embraces those flowers closer to her chest.
There was that mellow sound - just like the way she has planned - but today, it seems like it’s creating more tears than smiles.
Mirai took one step forward, her heart clenching her muscles - as if telling her that every step was risky yet she wanted to take it.
Slowly, she kept walking, all eyes on her, and her eyes to her feet. It was when she was about half-way that she decided to look up only to see the altar beautified rather differently. It was as if God was telling her to hold onto that tiny strength in her, and keep moving.
It will be hard letting go, but she knows that she will be able to - and as Yuri has said, she will be able to start again.
Her eyes moved to the person standing just a few distances away from the altar. She felt her cheeks kissed by another tear. It was Yuri, and he was smiling - his eyes teary as well.
~~~
There was about nothing to describe how beautiful she is, walking towards the altar. Her every movement, as if the angels were singing and the heavens are shining down on her. Yet that tear on her face, he wanted to just brush them off away.
Mirai reached just about a foot from him, and Yuri took a step forward. He took her hand, they were cold. He smiled and tightened his hold on her as if telling her a silent comfort.
They both faced the altar, and not long enough, Yuri kissed the back of her hand before he pulls her closer and closer, until he lands her hand and lets go of it - Ryosuke’s warm palms catching them.
Mirai, as much as she denies it, missed every bit of how these familiar hands feel under her hold. A smile escaped from her lips, and Ryosuke’s tears were just showing - what did he ever deserve to have this moment.
Yuri stood just between them, his hand withdrawing, and his eyes looking at Ryosuke’s. “Thank you…” Ryosuke uttered under his tears - it was as if Yuri has made the most amazing sacrifice in the world. Yuri nodded at him and his eyes were soon on Mirai’s. She was smiling. It was Yuri.. Yuri who has fulfilled Ryosuke's tiny wish, that of which Mirai holds clutched in her hands - on that tiny paper. She is smiling again - right now...
Mirai gazed upon Ryosuke’s eyes, then to Yuri’s. She was also crying, but Yuri felt his heart stop - perhaps because of happiness and pain - it was bittersweet, but he smiled back at her. “Remember…” he uttered, as the people dear to them, and God watched over this seemingly merged parting and union. Yuri held his words, looking at Ryosuke, then at Mirai, as he said, “I just want you to be happy…”
With that, Mirai’s lips were shut and shaking as she looked at Ryosuke and Ryosuke just nodded; Mirai just pulled Yuri, her best friend, her confidant, her protector, her strength, as she cried whispering… “Thank you…” why she always seem to say this and give him that satisfied yet hurting feel, perhaps Yuri will never get to understand it.
And as they broke their hug, Yuri patted on Ryosuke’s shoulder, “You take care of her…” he uttered, and completely steps back, leaving the two as they approach the altar.
The beautiful melody engulfs the air as the ceremony begins. It’s true it’s going to take just about every inch of him to forget and move on. Perhaps he will not be able to, but one thing Yuri is sure of at this very moment. As his heart still races and shouts its aching cries, he can’t help but feel satisfied that finally - at this very moment… she could be happy.
He did what he thinks he should, and he regrets nothing. For right now, the things he has done - the sacrifices he has made - making her happy for real; he was not too late to make a difference.
終わり
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I am truly sorry if you guys are disappointed... T^T THANK YOU FOR STICKING WITH ME TO THE BITTER END <3