oh dear we're going back to cavite
Spending New Year's away from civilization. Crap. Double crap. At least the PSP and books are portable.
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I don't know why, but I find Enchanted to be... the most hypocritical movie I've watched this year. Maybe that's the wrong word since it doesn't really say anything but TRU LOVE TRU LOVE TRU GODDAM LOVE IN YOUR FACE but still...
I dislike the fact that they everybody kept SINGING about knowing who your TRU LOVE (I must really invent a new phrase before I run this one into the ground) by the most superficial of actions (KISSING, my GAWD, you can tell who you'll marry by KISSING THEM THE MOMENT YOU SEE THEM) when Giselle somewhat resembles an anti-thesis to that. Because one moment, she THINKS she's in love with Edward, and for a whole of ten seconds she is, and then suddenly she falls into a well and kaPOOF (I wish there was a poof in the movie, just because all movies need something like that) she's McDreamy's significant other.
My problem with that is:
Where the fuck is the loyalty here? True love is supposed to be the stuff that knocks back all sorts of temptation, no matter how hard. You can't keep singing lines like 'You were made to finish my duet' blah blah blah and then fall for the next guy who comes your way. Because if she hadn't fallen into the well, and she DID marry Edward right on schedule, he'd still be her True Love which makes the whole thing with McDreamy a FLUKE and therefore, FUBAR. In the process of chasing after one guy from the next, didn't Giselle just imply how EASY she really is, and how she has absolutely no capacity to sustain affection for one person for more than ten minutes? If I were Patrick Dempsey, I wouldn't want anybody who falls in and out of love like gravity's own little ho.
You know what would have made this infinitely better? If Giselle HAD fallen in love with McDreamy but still left with Edward and then realized that yes, she did make the right decision. Because McDreamy was a TEST, as she was with him and his fiancee. Now THAT would have been True Love, complete with all the hard decisions and the sacrifices. The current plot as it is is just some sugared up version that's got so many logical plotholes that IT. IS. INSANE.
But then, Disney was never a bastion of sanity, so maybe this whole argument is moot.
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I want to make a 'Stop kicking Jason Todd in the bleeding balls DC' because really. REALLY. He does not deserve all the crap you keep sending his way.
Apparently, there are rumors circulating about that DC is going to kill Batman and replace the Batman with Jason Todd. Batman isn't really going to DIE though, since they're turning him into a New God or some such nonsense. Now this is a very bad idea. Actually this merits the return of the caps lock.
TURNING BATMAN INTO A GODDAM NEW GOD IS SUCH A BAD IDEA EVEN HITLER IS ROLLING IN HIS GRAVE.
Batman is supposed to be human. He's not Batman if he turns into some being with powers and super strength. That would be Superman, who is Jesus with an inferiority complex. The whole reason Batman is so interesting to read is because he's one fucked up person, and he has lines (which are defined by his humanity and ethics) which he won't cross no matter how much he suffers by abiding by them, and turning him into a God would completely, COMPLETELY mess with that status quo. The lines wouldn't have to exist and Bruce would go completely bonkers with all the possibilities open to him.
And let's face it. Batman would SUCK at being a God. The amount of therapy everyone would have to undergo (Justice League and readers included) would be spectacular. MIND BOGGLING. And directly proportional to how close the person is to Batman (which guarantees that Selina, Tim, Dick and Alfred will go insane. Jason's already batfucked, so he won't change all that much).
The whole idea is just wrong. I stand by that.
And because this involves Jason's future to such a large extent, I want to throw an even larger fit. JASON DOES NOT DESERVE THE PUNISHMENT OF BEING THE NEW BATMAN. Just because you can't dump this on Dick and Tim doesn't mean JASON has to be the resident punching bag. He deserves finding his OWN calling, not someone else's used underwear, and this hurts MORE not because I believe Jason will do such a bad job about it (let's face it, NOBODY will be as good a Batman as Bruce is like nobody was will ever be as perfect a Robin as Dick was) but because again, HE IS THE REPLACEMENT.
And isn't that the reason why he DIED in the first place? Because he was trying to fill Dick's acrobatic pixie boots with too little training? And here comes DC with a half-assed plan that stinks too much of bad plot and sensationalism and I just want to THROW THINGS at people right now.
UGH.
----*
I don't know why, but I find Enchanted to be... the most hypocritical movie I've watched this year. Maybe that's the wrong word since it doesn't really say anything but TRU LOVE TRU LOVE TRU GODDAM LOVE IN YOUR FACE but still...
I dislike the fact that they everybody kept SINGING about knowing who your TRU LOVE (I must really invent a new phrase before I run this one into the ground) by the most superficial of actions (KISSING, my GAWD, you can tell who you'll marry by KISSING THEM THE MOMENT YOU SEE THEM) when Giselle somewhat resembles an anti-thesis to that. Because one moment, she THINKS she's in love with Edward, and for a whole of ten seconds she is, and then suddenly she falls into a well and kaPOOF (I wish there was a poof in the movie, just because all movies need something like that) she's McDreamy's significant other.
My problem with that is:
Where the fuck is the loyalty here? True love is supposed to be the stuff that knocks back all sorts of temptation, no matter how hard. You can't keep singing lines like 'You were made to finish my duet' blah blah blah and then fall for the next guy who comes your way. Because if she hadn't fallen into the well, and she DID marry Edward right on schedule, he'd still be her True Love which makes the whole thing with McDreamy a FLUKE and therefore, FUBAR. In the process of chasing after one guy from the next, didn't Giselle just imply how EASY she really is, and how she has absolutely no capacity to sustain affection for one person for more than ten minutes? If I were Patrick Dempsey, I wouldn't want anybody who falls in and out of love like gravity's own little ho.
You know what would have made this infinitely better? If Giselle HAD fallen in love with McDreamy but still left with Edward and then realized that yes, she did make the right decision. Because McDreamy was a TEST, as she was with him and his fiancee. Now THAT would have been True Love, complete with all the hard decisions and the sacrifices. The current plot as it is is just some sugared up version that's got so many logical plotholes that IT. IS. INSANE.
But then, Disney was never a bastion of sanity, so maybe this whole argument is moot.
----*
I want to make a 'Stop kicking Jason Todd in the bleeding balls DC' because really. REALLY. He does not deserve all the crap you keep sending his way.
Apparently, there are rumors circulating about that DC is going to kill Batman and replace the Batman with Jason Todd. Batman isn't really going to DIE though, since they're turning him into a New God or some such nonsense. Now this is a very bad idea. Actually this merits the return of the caps lock.
TURNING BATMAN INTO A GODDAM NEW GOD IS SUCH A BAD IDEA EVEN HITLER IS ROLLING IN HIS GRAVE.
Batman is supposed to be human. He's not Batman if he turns into some being with powers and super strength. That would be Superman, who is Jesus with an inferiority complex. The whole reason Batman is so interesting to read is because he's one fucked up person, and he has lines (which are defined by his humanity and ethics) which he won't cross no matter how much he suffers by abiding by them, and turning him into a God would completely, COMPLETELY mess with that status quo. The lines wouldn't have to exist and Bruce would go completely bonkers with all the possibilities open to him.
And let's face it. Batman would SUCK at being a God. The amount of therapy everyone would have to undergo (Justice League and readers included) would be spectacular. MIND BOGGLING. And directly proportional to how close the person is to Batman (which guarantees that Selina, Tim, Dick and Alfred will go insane. Jason's already batfucked, so he won't change all that much).
The whole idea is just wrong. I stand by that.
And because this involves Jason's future to such a large extent, I want to throw an even larger fit. JASON DOES NOT DESERVE THE PUNISHMENT OF BEING THE NEW BATMAN. Just because you can't dump this on Dick and Tim doesn't mean JASON has to be the resident punching bag. He deserves finding his OWN calling, not someone else's used underwear, and this hurts MORE not because I believe Jason will do such a bad job about it (let's face it, NOBODY will be as good a Batman as Bruce is like nobody was will ever be as perfect a Robin as Dick was) but because again, HE IS THE REPLACEMENT.
And isn't that the reason why he DIED in the first place? Because he was trying to fill Dick's acrobatic pixie boots with too little training? And here comes DC with a half-assed plan that stinks too much of bad plot and sensationalism and I just want to THROW THINGS at people right now.
UGH.