GAH~!
Yah~! I just finished KH again, and saw the secret ending thingie...OH. MY. GOD. If they don't make a sequel to that game, I swear I'll kill someone. I will. O_O; Did anyone else see that?! With the CG Riku and all?! O_O; Gah!
Emm...yes. Moving on. Have come to the realization that all my extracurriculars etc. are over, so all I have left is waiting. To remedy that particular (suck-ass!) situation, I have vowed to read, write, and draw more. Also, to bring up French grade from B to A. But that's a little different ^_~;
Also, mother is now all a-flutter because a friend of her's step-nephew or something hanged himself in his father's garage. Now, I understand it's bad etc. and so forth (as I sound more and more like I don't care...I really do, I swear!) but for her to come in here, say, "If you ever do something so stupid as to commit suicide, I'll never speak to you again!" Well, dur. Might be tough. But also, she happens to KNOW that I disapprove of suicide more than pretty close to anything. ::Sigh:: Mothers.
Yarg...Lots to do this evening, but all I *really* want to do is go to bed. I hate being teenage.
On a more philosophical note, I have had a very hard time recently not feeling very, VERY mortal. As though if I haven't accomplished something earth-shattering before I'm 20, I've been a failure. As though it's all downhill from there. Whups, you're 21, what's that? You can drink now, but uh, you're pretty much worthless. I mean, I know that's not true, and Mrs Hurdle's age for that was 30, but still. I have a very difficult time accepting that I still have a lifetime ahead of me, and I don't have to write 27 novels, learn 12 languages, paint 9 masterpieces and star in 4 operas all before the end of the month, y'know? It's as though I have to accomplish my life's work (haha shut up! no puns) now or it doesn't mean anything.
Almost entirely separate: I have discovered that THE most annoying people on Earth are the ones who talk about THEMSELVES all the time. I understand that for some it's more natural than others, and that for many of those same few it's a way of coping with things and for a few of *those* same it's also just how they are. BUT STILL! C'mon people...Maybe I'm being unreasonable, but MY life doesn't revolve around YOU. I mean, it doesn't really revolve around me, either, or at least I try to center it around other people as much as I can, but I CANNOT be expected to make ONE other person the center of my universe. I would if I could stand it, but I CAN'T. As much as I know I'm horrible, it just makes me angry when people continuously talk about themselves or their lives or their families or all of those things. I mean, sometimes it's great to hear, and sometimes it's even good to vent, but ALL THE TIME gets a little monotonous. I should care more. I should be more willing to listen. I shouldn't mind, I should be flattered to be the chosen ear to whine to, I should do a lot of things. I can't. All I can do is concentrate on not SMACKING people whose every third or fourth sentence begins with "I," "My," or "Me" (for the grammatically challenged narcissist). Now, in this particular format, it may seem that I am being very hypocritical. And y'know, now that I think of it, maybe I am. But it still bugs me. I try my hardest not to impose my thoughts, feelings, or situations on people around me when I don't know they will be welcome. Admittedly, I don't always succeed. In fact, it's probably pretty rare that I do. But at least I TRY! For the love of God, people - You may be the center of YOUR world, but not mine or anybody else's! Get OVER it!
That said, I apologize to anyone who I may have just offended terribly. I, too, need my rant space, and again I apologize for making this the default venting area. I realize it probably comes across like I'm this angsty, stress-ridden, self-absorbed sludge bucket of narcissistic human material, but I swear I'm not always this bad! ^_^;;; Or at least, I try not to be. I'm generally very happy? I think? I don't know. If you hate me terribly because of this page, please, ask someone who knows me (like Shawn or Kyle or Rina or Brigitte) to tell you I don't suck as much as I sound like I do. ^_^;;; I'm sorry!
Emm...yes. Moving on. Have come to the realization that all my extracurriculars etc. are over, so all I have left is waiting. To remedy that particular (suck-ass!) situation, I have vowed to read, write, and draw more. Also, to bring up French grade from B to A. But that's a little different ^_~;
Also, mother is now all a-flutter because a friend of her's step-nephew or something hanged himself in his father's garage. Now, I understand it's bad etc. and so forth (as I sound more and more like I don't care...I really do, I swear!) but for her to come in here, say, "If you ever do something so stupid as to commit suicide, I'll never speak to you again!" Well, dur. Might be tough. But also, she happens to KNOW that I disapprove of suicide more than pretty close to anything. ::Sigh:: Mothers.
Yarg...Lots to do this evening, but all I *really* want to do is go to bed. I hate being teenage.
On a more philosophical note, I have had a very hard time recently not feeling very, VERY mortal. As though if I haven't accomplished something earth-shattering before I'm 20, I've been a failure. As though it's all downhill from there. Whups, you're 21, what's that? You can drink now, but uh, you're pretty much worthless. I mean, I know that's not true, and Mrs Hurdle's age for that was 30, but still. I have a very difficult time accepting that I still have a lifetime ahead of me, and I don't have to write 27 novels, learn 12 languages, paint 9 masterpieces and star in 4 operas all before the end of the month, y'know? It's as though I have to accomplish my life's work (haha shut up! no puns) now or it doesn't mean anything.
Almost entirely separate: I have discovered that THE most annoying people on Earth are the ones who talk about THEMSELVES all the time. I understand that for some it's more natural than others, and that for many of those same few it's a way of coping with things and for a few of *those* same it's also just how they are. BUT STILL! C'mon people...Maybe I'm being unreasonable, but MY life doesn't revolve around YOU. I mean, it doesn't really revolve around me, either, or at least I try to center it around other people as much as I can, but I CANNOT be expected to make ONE other person the center of my universe. I would if I could stand it, but I CAN'T. As much as I know I'm horrible, it just makes me angry when people continuously talk about themselves or their lives or their families or all of those things. I mean, sometimes it's great to hear, and sometimes it's even good to vent, but ALL THE TIME gets a little monotonous. I should care more. I should be more willing to listen. I shouldn't mind, I should be flattered to be the chosen ear to whine to, I should do a lot of things. I can't. All I can do is concentrate on not SMACKING people whose every third or fourth sentence begins with "I," "My," or "Me" (for the grammatically challenged narcissist). Now, in this particular format, it may seem that I am being very hypocritical. And y'know, now that I think of it, maybe I am. But it still bugs me. I try my hardest not to impose my thoughts, feelings, or situations on people around me when I don't know they will be welcome. Admittedly, I don't always succeed. In fact, it's probably pretty rare that I do. But at least I TRY! For the love of God, people - You may be the center of YOUR world, but not mine or anybody else's! Get OVER it!
That said, I apologize to anyone who I may have just offended terribly. I, too, need my rant space, and again I apologize for making this the default venting area. I realize it probably comes across like I'm this angsty, stress-ridden, self-absorbed sludge bucket of narcissistic human material, but I swear I'm not always this bad! ^_^;;; Or at least, I try not to be. I'm generally very happy? I think? I don't know. If you hate me terribly because of this page, please, ask someone who knows me (like Shawn or Kyle or Rina or Brigitte) to tell you I don't suck as much as I sound like I do. ^_^;;; I'm sorry!