Glee Reverse Big Bang Project
Title: A Long Time, On a Crooked Road
Media: fanfiction
Warnings: homophobia (implied/canon), character death
Word Count: approx. 4,060
Rating: PG-13 (cursing/implied violence and homophobia)
Pairings: Cooper/OFC, Kurt/Blaine
Disclaimer: I do not own Glee or its characters. This is for fun, not profit.
Summary: Days before Cooper Anderson leaves for Hollywood (possibly for good), his parents are killed in a tragic plane crash. Now he has to raise his little brother, Blaine. He also needs to figure out how to be an adult.
Author's Note: This piece was written for the Glee Reverse Big Bang. Wow, my first big bang! I think I picked the right one to try. Please enjoy. I want to commend the lovely artwork which inspired this by chosenfire28. You can find it here. I also want to thank the moderator of GRBB, saar_fantasy, for being my beta. The title of this piece refers to one of my favorite movies, Joe Versus the Volcano. I know that Kurt is basically a set piece in this (that's why I'm not cross-posting it to kurt_blaine), but I mostly wanted to examine Cooper. In this universe, he is a truly challenged character, and therefore this is probably the least fluffy piece in my fanfiction ouevre. I hope you still enjoy it!
March 2002
For the rest of his life, Cooper Anderson would remember that he was literally packing for his big break when he got the call. After a lot of work in his high school’s audiovisual lab, he had finally pulled together a decent audition tape and weaseled the money out of his parents to go to L.A. Since their parents had missed their flight yesterday and hadn’t made his Little League game that morning, Blaine was sitting on the end of the bed and tossing a baseball into his mitt disconsolately, moping as only a seven-year-old kid brother could. But who cared about dorky kid brothers? In just two hours, Cooper would wash his hands of six days of babysitting during his parents’ business trip in Minneapolis and finally be free. Once he got to L.A., he might not even come back. Who needed a high school diploma to be a star? There was only a few months left of school, anyway. Jim Carrey didn’t have his diploma, and he’d made some of the biggest movies in Hollywood.
Blaine brightened with hope when the wireless phone rang, but Cooper was too self-absorbed to notice, and picked up the phone automatically, continuing to fold shirts into the open suitcase by Blaine’s swinging foot.
“Anderson residence,” he intoned with the casually cheerful voice his mother had ingrained in him when he was Blaine’s age.
“Jim? Is that you?” his grandmother asked.
Cooper sighed. “No, Grandma, it’s Cooper.” Really, it was a good thing that his grandmother was in that nursing home. Ever since Grandfather had died a couple years ago, she had lost her marbles but good. They could call it Alzheimer’s, but Cooper’s overwhelming impression from their dutiful bi-weekly visits was of endlessly circling conversations and a faint smell of urine.
“Oh Jim, I’m so glad to hear your voice. There’s been the most terrible mix-up. The police tried to tell me that you and Irene had died in a plane crash.”
“What?” Cooper straightened in a hurry. “Grandma, what are you talking about?”
“The police, Jim. They called about an hour ago and said that you and Irene died in a plane crash from Minneapolis to Cincinnati. But that’s impossible, because they insisted that Cooper and Blaine weren’t with you, and it’s not like you’d leave a ten-year-old and a baby at home when you’re traveling internationally, is it?”
Cooper ignored her question for one of his own. “Why didn’t the police call here, Grandma?”
“Oh, they were going to, but since Cooper isn’t eighteen yet, he’s still a minor. The police were awfully grateful when I explained that there must have been a mix-up. I mean, I’m the children’s guardian. If you and Irene were traveling, the boys would be with me.”
Cooper’s head whirled. His parents were dead? He grabbed his remote and flicked on the small TV he’d gotten in January on his eighteenth birthday. Within two minutes, CNN’s crawling text confirmed his greatest fear.
Grief thankfully made the next few days a weary blur. He remembered the well-attended funeral with its empty caskets, the fridge full of casseroles and sympathetic eyes of his father’s colleagues’ wives, the reading of the will, and his gratitude when the lawyer had explained that although Amelia was still technically listed as Blaine’s guardian, his own recent birthday meant Cooper could petition the court to keep his little brother with him, instead of allowing him to go to a foster home.
He also remembered the heartbroken sobs coming from Blaine’s room as they “slept” at night. He wished he knew how to comfort Blaine, but he was pretty devastated himself. Thankfully, his father had owned a number of franchises, rather than belonging to a law firm or something that required an advanced degree. With the help of the lawyers, Cooper arranged to receive his GED and took over the management of the various managers’ complaints and concerns. Since he and Blaine needed to eat, and he was just an anonymous Mr. Anderson to his subordinates, they often killed two birds with one stone by eating dinner in one of their restaurants. Their incognito meals helped Cooper notice which stores treated their customers correctly and he implemented their practices across his father’s holdings. By the time Blaine was ready to go into middle school, Cooper was poised to open two more stores, and found himself working as hard as his father ever had.
He tried to stay involved with Blaine, he really did. However, it was difficult when he was twenty-two years old, hadn’t been on a date since junior prom, and had to present a stolid front to his employees. His laughing blue eyes and wavy hair, which surely would have won him acclaim and fame in Hollywood, were grave faults in the eyes of his subordinates, who were often at least twenty years older than he. How could he be expected to keep up with the latest fads or care about Blaine’s soccer games when he was trying to balance the books and keep his grandmother’s nursing home from evicting her after she accused a nurse of stealing her money? Cooper started slicking his hair back with gel, hoping it made him look older and more serious.
*****
2008
Amelia died Blaine’s freshman year of high school. Blaine, who had already been reclusive, withdrew so deeply into his shell that Cooper actually found himself noticing his brother again. Other than their bi-weekly visit to Amelia, who happily chattered to her son “Jim” and called Blaine “Cooper” the entire time, the brothers rarely spent time together. Blaine left any forms or report cards which needed signing in a basket by the front door, and Cooper hired a tutor who ensured that his younger brother made it home from school and completed his homework every night. On Friday nights, Cooper started having his vice president’s daughter come over to watch a movie with Blaine so that he could go to the Days Inn bar and drink three martinis, trying desperately to talk the older businesswomen into an abortive make-out session before their drive home. Saturday mornings, he made an effort to personally drive Blaine to his baseball or soccer game, even if he never stayed for the actual game, but their conversation was always stilted and focused on performing well in school or how the Reds were playing. He’d leave Blaine a sandwich for when a fellow player dropped him off, and use the blissful silence of the empty house to finish his accounting.
In the months after Christmas (Blaine had received a Kindle, because lately he seemed to mope around the house and read a lot more, and a gag gift of acne face wash. He hadn’t laughed.), Blaine asked if he could skip trying out for baseball. “I think I need the study time,” he mumbled, blushing bright red
Still, once Amelia died, Cooper knew something was wrong, and it wasn’t just that Blaine missed his grandmother. The funeral was miserable- Amelia had been barely literate by the time she had died, but she had still outlived the vast majority of her friends. Blaine and Cooper sat side-by-side in crappy plastic chairs by her open graveside, shivering as rain drizzled down the necks of their solemn black suits, but Cooper had no idea what to say.
“I’m sorry, buddy,” he offered softly. “We’ve been here too often the last few years.”
Blaine just nodded silently.
Cooper stared at him, trying desperately to think of something cheerful to say.
“What’s happening at school?” he finally offered.
“I’ve been invited to the Sadie Hawkins Dance,” Blaine replied uncomfortably.
“That’s awesome,” Cooper said too heartily. “I had no idea you were such a player, little bro. What’s her name?”
Blaine looked up quickly, wide-eyed. “Dan,” he whispered.
“As in Danielle? That’s an unusual nickname,” Cooper commented heartily. However, even as the words left his mouth, he realized what Blaine was trying to tell him. Really? Cooper thought desperately. You’re going to tell me this in the middle of our grandmother’s funeral? The thought had barely crossed his mind when he realized that since Cooper didn’t drive him to his games anymore, Blaine hadn’t really had another opportunity in the last… it couldn’t really be three weeks, could it?
“I mean, uh,” Cooper tried desperately to recover, even as all of Blaine’s strange behavior for the last few months suddenly crystallized into perfect clarity. The sad smiles, the Chuck poster which featured only Zachary Levi instead of Yvonne Strahovski, the quickly closed windows on Blaine’s laptop…even his sudden discomfort with his sports buddies made sense. It wasn’t just adolescence that was turning his normally friendly brother into a recluse. “Is he a good friend?”
“He’s…” Blaine paused for a long breath. “The only person who understands me at my school.”
“That sounds kind of lonely. Are you sure you want to, um… isolate yourself further?” Cooper asked.
Blaine’s face tightened. “We’re just going as friends.”
Wanting to soothe his feelings, Cooper nodded immediately. “It sounds like fun, then. Do we need to rent a tux?”
Blaine shook his head. “It’s not that formal. I was just going to wear this suit. Maybe with a yellow shirt?”
“No tie,” Cooper agreed.
*****
Yellow had been the wrong color choice, Cooper thought in later years. The red blood had shown up obscenely on its cheerful broadcloth and dried into a horrific, chalky brown as they cut it off his little brother. The hours that Blaine was in surgery were some of the worst of his life. Blaine was, no matter how cliche it sounded, the last person Cooper had in the world. Every relative they had had was dead, and his little brother was only 14 years old. He could actually feel the hair on his head graying. Somebody pushed a hot Styrofoam cup into his hand.
“It’s hot tea, with lots of sugar,” the curly-haired nurse in pink scrubs told him. “Are you really Blaine’s guardian?”
“Yes,” Cooper said hoarsely. “Our parents died six years ago.”
“I’m sorry,” she offered, and Cooper could tell she meant it. “I’m Nadine. I was in the ER with him. I’m off-duty now. I could wait with you, if you want.”
“Aren’t you tired?” Cooper asked, yearning to hear her say no. His mother’s insistence that he be polite might be only a distant memory, but she had been strict.
“Exhausted, but I think you need me the most of any patient I’ve had tonight.”
Cooper smiled weakly. Nadine was pretty, and roughly the same age as he. But what he noticed most about her at the moment was that she was offering some support. “I’d um, appreciate the company.”
Nadine nodded, sat down, and took his hand. It was the first time that Cooper cried that night, but not the last.
*****
2010
Dalton was Nadine’s idea, and it was a good one. She and Blaine had gotten along from the moment he regained consciousness, and their relationship settled easily into a friendly banter that Cooper couldn’t help envying. He watched them longingly as Nadine wheeled Blaine down the hallway to physical therapy, wishing he remembered how to relax and laugh like that. However, before he could join them, his cell rang and his vice president began having a minor heart attack about increasing paper goods costs. So he went back to being the youngest fast food franchise owner in the state of Ohio, since somebody had to keep the health care coming.
Still, after the wake-up call of Blaine’s attack, Cooper made a genuine effort to spend time with his brother. He also gathered his courage and called Nadine. Instead of the Days Inn, he took someone his own age to a local Italian restaurant. Over the tiramisu, he remembered that dating was more fun than hooking up. Much to his surprise, he eventually found himself with a girlfriend and an improving relationship with his younger brother. However, these developments didn’t make his life easy. In fact, they made it infinitely more difficult.
To begin with, Cooper and Blaine had never acknowledged the underlying reason for his attack. Cooper asked if Blaine wanted to press charges, he said “no,” and they left it at that. Anxious to fit in, Nadine insisted that all three of them eat dinner together once a week. Even though Cooper now took the time to notice Blaine’s after-school activities and friends, he still felt awkward around his sibling. He felt unprepared to deal with the fallout of a gay brother. So even though he suspected that Nadine knew, he never mentioned Blaine’s orientation to her.
Also, it was difficult to be a twenty-five year old who genuinely had no idea who Katy Perry was and hadn’t been inside a dance club in almost ten years. He and Nadine gamely went to the movies, but seeing The Hangover just made Cooper wish he could have at least TRIED to succeed in Hollywood. Blaine went to camp for most of the summer, because Nadine had the ER and her own apartment to maintain, and Cooper just couldn’t put off visiting his vendors any longer, although he was careful to drive rather than take a plane.
“You should try out for the a capella choir,” Nadine said excitedly the first week of Blaine’s sophomore year.
Blaine blushed. “Do you really think they’d want me?”
Nadine raised her eyebrows at Cooper. “Tell him yes, or you’re not even getting a goodnight kiss tonight,” they telegraphed.
“Um,” Cooper coughed. “Of course. You have a decent set of pipes, we both do. And it’ll give you a place to… fit in.”
Blaine looked at him carefully for a moment. Cooper resisted the urge to run his tongue over his teeth and check that there wasn’t any spinach stuck in them.
“Sounds good,” Blaine nodded.
The day of the audition, Blaine borrowed Cooper’s gel and slicked his hair back. It made him look a bit like a fifties movie star, but it fit his new, quieter persona. Cooper bought him an expensive container of hair paste, and the brothers would smile at one another in the mirror as they both put on their professional masks at six am. It felt like connection.
Yet they still never talked without Nadine to play referee.
*****
Something was changing his little brother. At first, all of his stories at family dinner were about the Warblers, and their performances, and his solos (Cooper wrote the concert dates into his calendar dutifully but never managed to make a performance, because dammit, someone had to put bread on the table, and that someone was somehow him). Nadine assured him that Blaine was wonderful. Each day Blaine seemed to grow into his own body and exude confidence. When the name Kurt started popping up on a regular basis, Cooper didn’t take much notice. The damn suppliers in freaking Kentucky were driving him CRAZY, honest-to-god, he was going to cut a bitch. Who gave a crap if they had to spend an extra two cents a gross for plastic dinnerware? The assurance that they weren’t using child slaves in India to make the forks but were paying Bolivians a living wage was enough for Cooper. Blaine’s gas bill, on the other hand, was a slight blip on his radar, but once Kurt started going to Dalton that improved.
At Christmas, after he FINALLY saw Blaine sing a duet with a petite blond chick (yeah, the kid was really good, and he deserved the shot Cooper wasn’t going to get), he and Blaine joined Nadine’s family in Akron. Nadine had two cousins, little girls of eight and nine, who followed Blaine around with stars in their eyes. Blaine started to walk taller. They stayed three days, and Blaine hugged Cooper hard when he showed him the pictures of the baby grand which would be delivered to their home.
“Go big or go home, bro,” Cooper shrugged as he hid his grin.
Still, when the names Mercedes, Rachel, and Jeremiah (”Oh Lord, Nadine, HIS HAIR,” Blaine muttered in a besotted voice) started to be bantered across the garlic bread and spaghetti of the impromptu family’s weekly dinner in early February, Cooper had to pull his head out of the sand and pay attention.
“Mercedes and Rachel are unusual names for boys,” Cooper joked, weakly.
“Idiot,” Blaine said happily, taking a huge bite of salad. “They’re Kurt’s friends from his old school.”
“Is Jeremiah Kurt’s friend, too?” Cooper asked, curiously.
Blaine shook his head and blushed. “He works at the Gap. We’ve had coffee a couple times.”
Cooper searched desperately for something to say. “Uh, is that why your credit card bill last month was almost all at the Lima Bean?”
Blaine eyed him scornfully. “Cooper, Kurt and I go there after every Warblers practice. We STUDY there. The Lima Bean charges are totally legit. I pay for my dates myself with my money from the gig at King’s Island.”
“So there have been dates?” Cooper asked carefully. Nadine turned to look at Blaine intently.
His brother’s face fell. “Well, no, not really. But I intend to pay for any dates by myself.”
“Oh-kay,” Cooper agreed. Anything to end this conversation. “Does that mean you have plans for Valentine’s Day?”
“I think you and Nadine should definitely plan a night out alone,” Blaine confirmed happily.
“Ooo-la-la,” Nadine teased. “That puts all the pressure on you, Coop.” She quirked an eyebrow at him. They were already planning to spend a rare night together in Cincinnati, but Cooper refrained from pointing that out. He also pretended not to notice Blaine’s hangdog look the day before Valentine’s. Despite whatever it was that happened, Blaine followed their normal routine when Cooper was gone overnight and texted that he was home at ten, so he must have gone out with someone.
Cooper took a quick business trip to New York the next weekend for a shareholder’s meeting, and then the brothers went back to their normal routine, with Blaine consumed by school and Cooper wrapped up in business. He noticed vaguely that Blaine went out on a school night, but Blaine explained that the revival theatre had been showing Love Story, so it wasn’t a big deal. Then, a week later, Nadine had to go to a medical conference in Houston. Coincidentally, Cooper received the Mastercard bill two days after she left. He glanced at the total. Surprised, he squinted to review the delineated expenses. What the hell was H0T.XXX.Men? And why did it charge Blaine’s credit card $289?
Blaine was surprised to find himself checked out of school early that Wednesday. When he made his way to the parking lot, Cooper was sitting behind the wheel of his SUV; the engine was still running.
“What’s up, Coop?” Blaine asked. “I don’t have a dentist appointment or anything today, do I?”
“Do. Not. Speak. Until we get home,” Cooper pushed out through his gritted teeth. Then he gunned the engine before Blaine even had the chance to buckle up. “Oh shit, he knows I spent the night at Kurt’s,” Blaine thought miserably.
When they arrived at the house, Cooper screeched into the garage.
“My office,” he snapped. “Now. And close the door.” Blaine thought about pointing out that there was no one to hear them, but refrained as Cooper stalked past him and slammed his hand into his desk.
Cooper turned around so that his back was to Blaine, closed his eyes, and tried to count to ten. It didn’t work.
“Cooper, I know this looks bad on the surface, but I was really being responsible…” Blaine blurted, but Cooper stopped him by raising his hand imperiously.
“What the FUCK are you doing paying for PORN with your allowance card,” he exploded.
“I was just too drunk to drive, and…what?”
“WHAT?” Cooper could actually feel his heart pounding in his chest. “What the hell are you talking about, Blaine?”
Blaine’s eyes darted to the left. “Um, I went to a party with Kurt, and he was DD…”
Cooper’s face tightened until it was almost gray with the tension. “Cut to the chase, Blaine.”
“I went to a McKinley party, got drunk and then spent the night at Kurt’s? Totally platonically, I swear.”
“I don’t give a SHIT if you’re sleeping with Kurt. At least that doesn’t cost MONEY. Blaine, do you realize that you spent $1200 on internet porn this month? On GAY internet porn? Michelle opens our bills! She saw the charges! Do you have any idea how mortifying…”
“So WHAT?” Blaine exploded. “You think they don’t all KNOW? I almost died because some rednecks decided I deserved to pay for my sexual orientation. It's not like it wasn't widely discussed at the time."
"That isn't the point," Cooper pointed out tightly.
"I know. I know you hate the fact that I'm gay," Blaine nodded quickly. "But I can't help it, Coop. And do you know what I hate? I hate how the only time we talk is when Nadine's around or I've spent too much money. You see-saw between being the most generous person on the planet and the most tight-fisted! And I NEVER know what's going on in your head. You haven't told me a single personal thing since the day Mom and Dad died!" Blaine took a deep breath so that he could continue, but Cooper stopped him by reaching out and touching his arm.
"Blaine. Why do you think I'm mad you're gay?"
"You... you're not?"Blaine blinked at him.
“Don’t be ridiculous. I just don’t know what to say to you. I mean, I had only dated three girls when Mom and Dad died. After, it was a long dry spell until Nadine. And quite frankly, I was too busy trying to figure out how to fire someone fifteen years older than me to watch Queer Eye for the Straight Guy or whatever. I mean, nobody talked about this stuff to me, either. All I knew was that the birds and bees speech Dad gave me was wildly inappropriate for you. ”
“I guess I didn’t think about that,” Blaine murmured.
“Well, think about it. And also, think about FREE porn. Jesus, Blaine, you’re not even eighteen. Do you realize what a pain in the ass it’s going to be to pay your legal fees if you get caught?”
Blaine turned crimson. “I thought it was free,” he murmured.
“Just a hint? If they ask for credit card info, they’re going to find a way to use it. Also, why the hell are you and Kurt platonic? He’s been the only name out of your mouth for months!”
“We’re still working things out,” Blaine shrugged. “I don’t want to screw up the best friendship I have with love unless I’m sure, you know?”
“Oh," Cooper paused. "I get that. But um, if you and Kurt decided to take things to the next level, you… know how to do that? And to use condoms?”
“Google is very adamant about safe sex, no matter who I choose as a partner,” Blaine hastened to assure him. “Oh God, Cooper, it’s such a relief to know that you don’t hate me for being gay. I used to worry about it when I was supposed to be sleeping. You’re literally the only person I have left. I can’t do without you. But that still doesn’t solve the problem that we never talk. I mean, what about Nadine? Do you love her? Is she just handy to have around?”
“No!” Cooper said vehemently. “I do love her. Geez, kid, why do you think I blew up? I was going to buy her a freaking engagement ring this month! We’ve been together long enough. I know I love her. I know you love her…”
Blaine smiled, but it faded as he realized what Cooper was saying. “You can’t buy Nadine an engagement ring because I spent too much on porn?”
“I can afford it, barely. I just need you to be more careful- not just financially.” Cooper smiled. “So I have your blessing, right?”
“Definitely. Can I help you pick out the ring?”
“Why don’t you invite Kurt along? If I recall correctly, you said he planned his Dad and stepmother’s wedding, right?”
“You remember that?” Blaine’s face was radiant.
“Shockingly, I do. You’ll be my best man, too, right?”
“What are brothers for?”
Media: fanfiction
Warnings: homophobia (implied/canon), character death
Word Count: approx. 4,060
Rating: PG-13 (cursing/implied violence and homophobia)
Pairings: Cooper/OFC, Kurt/Blaine
Disclaimer: I do not own Glee or its characters. This is for fun, not profit.
Summary: Days before Cooper Anderson leaves for Hollywood (possibly for good), his parents are killed in a tragic plane crash. Now he has to raise his little brother, Blaine. He also needs to figure out how to be an adult.
Author's Note: This piece was written for the Glee Reverse Big Bang. Wow, my first big bang! I think I picked the right one to try. Please enjoy. I want to commend the lovely artwork which inspired this by chosenfire28. You can find it here. I also want to thank the moderator of GRBB, saar_fantasy, for being my beta. The title of this piece refers to one of my favorite movies, Joe Versus the Volcano. I know that Kurt is basically a set piece in this (that's why I'm not cross-posting it to kurt_blaine), but I mostly wanted to examine Cooper. In this universe, he is a truly challenged character, and therefore this is probably the least fluffy piece in my fanfiction ouevre. I hope you still enjoy it!
March 2002
For the rest of his life, Cooper Anderson would remember that he was literally packing for his big break when he got the call. After a lot of work in his high school’s audiovisual lab, he had finally pulled together a decent audition tape and weaseled the money out of his parents to go to L.A. Since their parents had missed their flight yesterday and hadn’t made his Little League game that morning, Blaine was sitting on the end of the bed and tossing a baseball into his mitt disconsolately, moping as only a seven-year-old kid brother could. But who cared about dorky kid brothers? In just two hours, Cooper would wash his hands of six days of babysitting during his parents’ business trip in Minneapolis and finally be free. Once he got to L.A., he might not even come back. Who needed a high school diploma to be a star? There was only a few months left of school, anyway. Jim Carrey didn’t have his diploma, and he’d made some of the biggest movies in Hollywood.
Blaine brightened with hope when the wireless phone rang, but Cooper was too self-absorbed to notice, and picked up the phone automatically, continuing to fold shirts into the open suitcase by Blaine’s swinging foot.
“Anderson residence,” he intoned with the casually cheerful voice his mother had ingrained in him when he was Blaine’s age.
“Jim? Is that you?” his grandmother asked.
Cooper sighed. “No, Grandma, it’s Cooper.” Really, it was a good thing that his grandmother was in that nursing home. Ever since Grandfather had died a couple years ago, she had lost her marbles but good. They could call it Alzheimer’s, but Cooper’s overwhelming impression from their dutiful bi-weekly visits was of endlessly circling conversations and a faint smell of urine.
“Oh Jim, I’m so glad to hear your voice. There’s been the most terrible mix-up. The police tried to tell me that you and Irene had died in a plane crash.”
“What?” Cooper straightened in a hurry. “Grandma, what are you talking about?”
“The police, Jim. They called about an hour ago and said that you and Irene died in a plane crash from Minneapolis to Cincinnati. But that’s impossible, because they insisted that Cooper and Blaine weren’t with you, and it’s not like you’d leave a ten-year-old and a baby at home when you’re traveling internationally, is it?”
Cooper ignored her question for one of his own. “Why didn’t the police call here, Grandma?”
“Oh, they were going to, but since Cooper isn’t eighteen yet, he’s still a minor. The police were awfully grateful when I explained that there must have been a mix-up. I mean, I’m the children’s guardian. If you and Irene were traveling, the boys would be with me.”
Cooper’s head whirled. His parents were dead? He grabbed his remote and flicked on the small TV he’d gotten in January on his eighteenth birthday. Within two minutes, CNN’s crawling text confirmed his greatest fear.
Grief thankfully made the next few days a weary blur. He remembered the well-attended funeral with its empty caskets, the fridge full of casseroles and sympathetic eyes of his father’s colleagues’ wives, the reading of the will, and his gratitude when the lawyer had explained that although Amelia was still technically listed as Blaine’s guardian, his own recent birthday meant Cooper could petition the court to keep his little brother with him, instead of allowing him to go to a foster home.
He also remembered the heartbroken sobs coming from Blaine’s room as they “slept” at night. He wished he knew how to comfort Blaine, but he was pretty devastated himself. Thankfully, his father had owned a number of franchises, rather than belonging to a law firm or something that required an advanced degree. With the help of the lawyers, Cooper arranged to receive his GED and took over the management of the various managers’ complaints and concerns. Since he and Blaine needed to eat, and he was just an anonymous Mr. Anderson to his subordinates, they often killed two birds with one stone by eating dinner in one of their restaurants. Their incognito meals helped Cooper notice which stores treated their customers correctly and he implemented their practices across his father’s holdings. By the time Blaine was ready to go into middle school, Cooper was poised to open two more stores, and found himself working as hard as his father ever had.
He tried to stay involved with Blaine, he really did. However, it was difficult when he was twenty-two years old, hadn’t been on a date since junior prom, and had to present a stolid front to his employees. His laughing blue eyes and wavy hair, which surely would have won him acclaim and fame in Hollywood, were grave faults in the eyes of his subordinates, who were often at least twenty years older than he. How could he be expected to keep up with the latest fads or care about Blaine’s soccer games when he was trying to balance the books and keep his grandmother’s nursing home from evicting her after she accused a nurse of stealing her money? Cooper started slicking his hair back with gel, hoping it made him look older and more serious.
*****
2008
Amelia died Blaine’s freshman year of high school. Blaine, who had already been reclusive, withdrew so deeply into his shell that Cooper actually found himself noticing his brother again. Other than their bi-weekly visit to Amelia, who happily chattered to her son “Jim” and called Blaine “Cooper” the entire time, the brothers rarely spent time together. Blaine left any forms or report cards which needed signing in a basket by the front door, and Cooper hired a tutor who ensured that his younger brother made it home from school and completed his homework every night. On Friday nights, Cooper started having his vice president’s daughter come over to watch a movie with Blaine so that he could go to the Days Inn bar and drink three martinis, trying desperately to talk the older businesswomen into an abortive make-out session before their drive home. Saturday mornings, he made an effort to personally drive Blaine to his baseball or soccer game, even if he never stayed for the actual game, but their conversation was always stilted and focused on performing well in school or how the Reds were playing. He’d leave Blaine a sandwich for when a fellow player dropped him off, and use the blissful silence of the empty house to finish his accounting.
In the months after Christmas (Blaine had received a Kindle, because lately he seemed to mope around the house and read a lot more, and a gag gift of acne face wash. He hadn’t laughed.), Blaine asked if he could skip trying out for baseball. “I think I need the study time,” he mumbled, blushing bright red
Still, once Amelia died, Cooper knew something was wrong, and it wasn’t just that Blaine missed his grandmother. The funeral was miserable- Amelia had been barely literate by the time she had died, but she had still outlived the vast majority of her friends. Blaine and Cooper sat side-by-side in crappy plastic chairs by her open graveside, shivering as rain drizzled down the necks of their solemn black suits, but Cooper had no idea what to say.
“I’m sorry, buddy,” he offered softly. “We’ve been here too often the last few years.”
Blaine just nodded silently.
Cooper stared at him, trying desperately to think of something cheerful to say.
“What’s happening at school?” he finally offered.
“I’ve been invited to the Sadie Hawkins Dance,” Blaine replied uncomfortably.
“That’s awesome,” Cooper said too heartily. “I had no idea you were such a player, little bro. What’s her name?”
Blaine looked up quickly, wide-eyed. “Dan,” he whispered.
“As in Danielle? That’s an unusual nickname,” Cooper commented heartily. However, even as the words left his mouth, he realized what Blaine was trying to tell him. Really? Cooper thought desperately. You’re going to tell me this in the middle of our grandmother’s funeral? The thought had barely crossed his mind when he realized that since Cooper didn’t drive him to his games anymore, Blaine hadn’t really had another opportunity in the last… it couldn’t really be three weeks, could it?
“I mean, uh,” Cooper tried desperately to recover, even as all of Blaine’s strange behavior for the last few months suddenly crystallized into perfect clarity. The sad smiles, the Chuck poster which featured only Zachary Levi instead of Yvonne Strahovski, the quickly closed windows on Blaine’s laptop…even his sudden discomfort with his sports buddies made sense. It wasn’t just adolescence that was turning his normally friendly brother into a recluse. “Is he a good friend?”
“He’s…” Blaine paused for a long breath. “The only person who understands me at my school.”
“That sounds kind of lonely. Are you sure you want to, um… isolate yourself further?” Cooper asked.
Blaine’s face tightened. “We’re just going as friends.”
Wanting to soothe his feelings, Cooper nodded immediately. “It sounds like fun, then. Do we need to rent a tux?”
Blaine shook his head. “It’s not that formal. I was just going to wear this suit. Maybe with a yellow shirt?”
“No tie,” Cooper agreed.
*****
Yellow had been the wrong color choice, Cooper thought in later years. The red blood had shown up obscenely on its cheerful broadcloth and dried into a horrific, chalky brown as they cut it off his little brother. The hours that Blaine was in surgery were some of the worst of his life. Blaine was, no matter how cliche it sounded, the last person Cooper had in the world. Every relative they had had was dead, and his little brother was only 14 years old. He could actually feel the hair on his head graying. Somebody pushed a hot Styrofoam cup into his hand.
“It’s hot tea, with lots of sugar,” the curly-haired nurse in pink scrubs told him. “Are you really Blaine’s guardian?”
“Yes,” Cooper said hoarsely. “Our parents died six years ago.”
“I’m sorry,” she offered, and Cooper could tell she meant it. “I’m Nadine. I was in the ER with him. I’m off-duty now. I could wait with you, if you want.”
“Aren’t you tired?” Cooper asked, yearning to hear her say no. His mother’s insistence that he be polite might be only a distant memory, but she had been strict.
“Exhausted, but I think you need me the most of any patient I’ve had tonight.”
Cooper smiled weakly. Nadine was pretty, and roughly the same age as he. But what he noticed most about her at the moment was that she was offering some support. “I’d um, appreciate the company.”
Nadine nodded, sat down, and took his hand. It was the first time that Cooper cried that night, but not the last.
*****
2010
Dalton was Nadine’s idea, and it was a good one. She and Blaine had gotten along from the moment he regained consciousness, and their relationship settled easily into a friendly banter that Cooper couldn’t help envying. He watched them longingly as Nadine wheeled Blaine down the hallway to physical therapy, wishing he remembered how to relax and laugh like that. However, before he could join them, his cell rang and his vice president began having a minor heart attack about increasing paper goods costs. So he went back to being the youngest fast food franchise owner in the state of Ohio, since somebody had to keep the health care coming.
Still, after the wake-up call of Blaine’s attack, Cooper made a genuine effort to spend time with his brother. He also gathered his courage and called Nadine. Instead of the Days Inn, he took someone his own age to a local Italian restaurant. Over the tiramisu, he remembered that dating was more fun than hooking up. Much to his surprise, he eventually found himself with a girlfriend and an improving relationship with his younger brother. However, these developments didn’t make his life easy. In fact, they made it infinitely more difficult.
To begin with, Cooper and Blaine had never acknowledged the underlying reason for his attack. Cooper asked if Blaine wanted to press charges, he said “no,” and they left it at that. Anxious to fit in, Nadine insisted that all three of them eat dinner together once a week. Even though Cooper now took the time to notice Blaine’s after-school activities and friends, he still felt awkward around his sibling. He felt unprepared to deal with the fallout of a gay brother. So even though he suspected that Nadine knew, he never mentioned Blaine’s orientation to her.
Also, it was difficult to be a twenty-five year old who genuinely had no idea who Katy Perry was and hadn’t been inside a dance club in almost ten years. He and Nadine gamely went to the movies, but seeing The Hangover just made Cooper wish he could have at least TRIED to succeed in Hollywood. Blaine went to camp for most of the summer, because Nadine had the ER and her own apartment to maintain, and Cooper just couldn’t put off visiting his vendors any longer, although he was careful to drive rather than take a plane.
“You should try out for the a capella choir,” Nadine said excitedly the first week of Blaine’s sophomore year.
Blaine blushed. “Do you really think they’d want me?”
Nadine raised her eyebrows at Cooper. “Tell him yes, or you’re not even getting a goodnight kiss tonight,” they telegraphed.
“Um,” Cooper coughed. “Of course. You have a decent set of pipes, we both do. And it’ll give you a place to… fit in.”
Blaine looked at him carefully for a moment. Cooper resisted the urge to run his tongue over his teeth and check that there wasn’t any spinach stuck in them.
“Sounds good,” Blaine nodded.
The day of the audition, Blaine borrowed Cooper’s gel and slicked his hair back. It made him look a bit like a fifties movie star, but it fit his new, quieter persona. Cooper bought him an expensive container of hair paste, and the brothers would smile at one another in the mirror as they both put on their professional masks at six am. It felt like connection.
Yet they still never talked without Nadine to play referee.
*****
Something was changing his little brother. At first, all of his stories at family dinner were about the Warblers, and their performances, and his solos (Cooper wrote the concert dates into his calendar dutifully but never managed to make a performance, because dammit, someone had to put bread on the table, and that someone was somehow him). Nadine assured him that Blaine was wonderful. Each day Blaine seemed to grow into his own body and exude confidence. When the name Kurt started popping up on a regular basis, Cooper didn’t take much notice. The damn suppliers in freaking Kentucky were driving him CRAZY, honest-to-god, he was going to cut a bitch. Who gave a crap if they had to spend an extra two cents a gross for plastic dinnerware? The assurance that they weren’t using child slaves in India to make the forks but were paying Bolivians a living wage was enough for Cooper. Blaine’s gas bill, on the other hand, was a slight blip on his radar, but once Kurt started going to Dalton that improved.
At Christmas, after he FINALLY saw Blaine sing a duet with a petite blond chick (yeah, the kid was really good, and he deserved the shot Cooper wasn’t going to get), he and Blaine joined Nadine’s family in Akron. Nadine had two cousins, little girls of eight and nine, who followed Blaine around with stars in their eyes. Blaine started to walk taller. They stayed three days, and Blaine hugged Cooper hard when he showed him the pictures of the baby grand which would be delivered to their home.
“Go big or go home, bro,” Cooper shrugged as he hid his grin.
Still, when the names Mercedes, Rachel, and Jeremiah (”Oh Lord, Nadine, HIS HAIR,” Blaine muttered in a besotted voice) started to be bantered across the garlic bread and spaghetti of the impromptu family’s weekly dinner in early February, Cooper had to pull his head out of the sand and pay attention.
“Mercedes and Rachel are unusual names for boys,” Cooper joked, weakly.
“Idiot,” Blaine said happily, taking a huge bite of salad. “They’re Kurt’s friends from his old school.”
“Is Jeremiah Kurt’s friend, too?” Cooper asked, curiously.
Blaine shook his head and blushed. “He works at the Gap. We’ve had coffee a couple times.”
Cooper searched desperately for something to say. “Uh, is that why your credit card bill last month was almost all at the Lima Bean?”
Blaine eyed him scornfully. “Cooper, Kurt and I go there after every Warblers practice. We STUDY there. The Lima Bean charges are totally legit. I pay for my dates myself with my money from the gig at King’s Island.”
“So there have been dates?” Cooper asked carefully. Nadine turned to look at Blaine intently.
His brother’s face fell. “Well, no, not really. But I intend to pay for any dates by myself.”
“Oh-kay,” Cooper agreed. Anything to end this conversation. “Does that mean you have plans for Valentine’s Day?”
“I think you and Nadine should definitely plan a night out alone,” Blaine confirmed happily.
“Ooo-la-la,” Nadine teased. “That puts all the pressure on you, Coop.” She quirked an eyebrow at him. They were already planning to spend a rare night together in Cincinnati, but Cooper refrained from pointing that out. He also pretended not to notice Blaine’s hangdog look the day before Valentine’s. Despite whatever it was that happened, Blaine followed their normal routine when Cooper was gone overnight and texted that he was home at ten, so he must have gone out with someone.
Cooper took a quick business trip to New York the next weekend for a shareholder’s meeting, and then the brothers went back to their normal routine, with Blaine consumed by school and Cooper wrapped up in business. He noticed vaguely that Blaine went out on a school night, but Blaine explained that the revival theatre had been showing Love Story, so it wasn’t a big deal. Then, a week later, Nadine had to go to a medical conference in Houston. Coincidentally, Cooper received the Mastercard bill two days after she left. He glanced at the total. Surprised, he squinted to review the delineated expenses. What the hell was H0T.XXX.Men? And why did it charge Blaine’s credit card $289?
Blaine was surprised to find himself checked out of school early that Wednesday. When he made his way to the parking lot, Cooper was sitting behind the wheel of his SUV; the engine was still running.
“What’s up, Coop?” Blaine asked. “I don’t have a dentist appointment or anything today, do I?”
“Do. Not. Speak. Until we get home,” Cooper pushed out through his gritted teeth. Then he gunned the engine before Blaine even had the chance to buckle up. “Oh shit, he knows I spent the night at Kurt’s,” Blaine thought miserably.
When they arrived at the house, Cooper screeched into the garage.
“My office,” he snapped. “Now. And close the door.” Blaine thought about pointing out that there was no one to hear them, but refrained as Cooper stalked past him and slammed his hand into his desk.
Cooper turned around so that his back was to Blaine, closed his eyes, and tried to count to ten. It didn’t work.
“Cooper, I know this looks bad on the surface, but I was really being responsible…” Blaine blurted, but Cooper stopped him by raising his hand imperiously.
“What the FUCK are you doing paying for PORN with your allowance card,” he exploded.
“I was just too drunk to drive, and…what?”
“WHAT?” Cooper could actually feel his heart pounding in his chest. “What the hell are you talking about, Blaine?”
Blaine’s eyes darted to the left. “Um, I went to a party with Kurt, and he was DD…”
Cooper’s face tightened until it was almost gray with the tension. “Cut to the chase, Blaine.”
“I went to a McKinley party, got drunk and then spent the night at Kurt’s? Totally platonically, I swear.”
“I don’t give a SHIT if you’re sleeping with Kurt. At least that doesn’t cost MONEY. Blaine, do you realize that you spent $1200 on internet porn this month? On GAY internet porn? Michelle opens our bills! She saw the charges! Do you have any idea how mortifying…”
“So WHAT?” Blaine exploded. “You think they don’t all KNOW? I almost died because some rednecks decided I deserved to pay for my sexual orientation. It's not like it wasn't widely discussed at the time."
"That isn't the point," Cooper pointed out tightly.
"I know. I know you hate the fact that I'm gay," Blaine nodded quickly. "But I can't help it, Coop. And do you know what I hate? I hate how the only time we talk is when Nadine's around or I've spent too much money. You see-saw between being the most generous person on the planet and the most tight-fisted! And I NEVER know what's going on in your head. You haven't told me a single personal thing since the day Mom and Dad died!" Blaine took a deep breath so that he could continue, but Cooper stopped him by reaching out and touching his arm.
"Blaine. Why do you think I'm mad you're gay?"
"You... you're not?"Blaine blinked at him.
“Don’t be ridiculous. I just don’t know what to say to you. I mean, I had only dated three girls when Mom and Dad died. After, it was a long dry spell until Nadine. And quite frankly, I was too busy trying to figure out how to fire someone fifteen years older than me to watch Queer Eye for the Straight Guy or whatever. I mean, nobody talked about this stuff to me, either. All I knew was that the birds and bees speech Dad gave me was wildly inappropriate for you. ”
“I guess I didn’t think about that,” Blaine murmured.
“Well, think about it. And also, think about FREE porn. Jesus, Blaine, you’re not even eighteen. Do you realize what a pain in the ass it’s going to be to pay your legal fees if you get caught?”
Blaine turned crimson. “I thought it was free,” he murmured.
“Just a hint? If they ask for credit card info, they’re going to find a way to use it. Also, why the hell are you and Kurt platonic? He’s been the only name out of your mouth for months!”
“We’re still working things out,” Blaine shrugged. “I don’t want to screw up the best friendship I have with love unless I’m sure, you know?”
“Oh," Cooper paused. "I get that. But um, if you and Kurt decided to take things to the next level, you… know how to do that? And to use condoms?”
“Google is very adamant about safe sex, no matter who I choose as a partner,” Blaine hastened to assure him. “Oh God, Cooper, it’s such a relief to know that you don’t hate me for being gay. I used to worry about it when I was supposed to be sleeping. You’re literally the only person I have left. I can’t do without you. But that still doesn’t solve the problem that we never talk. I mean, what about Nadine? Do you love her? Is she just handy to have around?”
“No!” Cooper said vehemently. “I do love her. Geez, kid, why do you think I blew up? I was going to buy her a freaking engagement ring this month! We’ve been together long enough. I know I love her. I know you love her…”
Blaine smiled, but it faded as he realized what Cooper was saying. “You can’t buy Nadine an engagement ring because I spent too much on porn?”
“I can afford it, barely. I just need you to be more careful- not just financially.” Cooper smiled. “So I have your blessing, right?”
“Definitely. Can I help you pick out the ring?”
“Why don’t you invite Kurt along? If I recall correctly, you said he planned his Dad and stepmother’s wedding, right?”
“You remember that?” Blaine’s face was radiant.
“Shockingly, I do. You’ll be my best man, too, right?”
“What are brothers for?”