logging the loggity log

[marsfireignite]

Characters: Hino Rei [marsfireignite] and Castiel [wingsandwill]
When: Early morning hours of September 24th.
Where: The Temple of Heaven.
Rating: PG. It's them. Seriously. They do puzzles in their spare time.
Summary: Rei has a vision. Three in the morning is a totally acceptable time to share it.

Comments

[wingsandwill]

Castiel had just finished feeding Adva, the kitten having fallen asleep on the bed, Castiel sitting on the ground with his back to the piece of furniture. His books were spread across the floor in front of him; clearly he hasn't bothered attempting to sleep that night yet himself. Like Rei, he sleeps badly at best, and though lately his near-constant nightmares had begun to die down it was still an ordeal.

He heard and felt movement in the Temple, but disregarded it; others, particularly Rei, were up at this time of night on occasion. But when she suddenly enters his room he's on his feet in an instant, unsure what was going on. Was she hurt? Had something happened?

And then her words caught up. 'I saw.' A vision. His chest twisted in what he had learned to recognize as physical reaction to anxiety, as he responded. "Saw what?"

[marsfireignite]

She held up a hand to get him to shut up while she sucked in a breath, closing the door behind her quickly to lean against it, to ensure privacy. Where could she begin? Should she even share it? What if it was wrong?

But the doubt is quickly crushed at the concern exhibited by Castiel, and so Rei plunged forward without thinking much more of it.

"I saw you," Rei began, still a little breathless, fingers brushing her bangs out of her eyes quickly so she could look at Castiel in the eye, "and you looked horrible -- sort of, you looked -- you looked like you, but you were bloody and your face -- not your face, but your vessel's face, I guess, unless whatever was happening inside of you affected you, too, but

[wingsandwill]

He's quiet when she gestures for him to be, watching her uncertainly, wondering what it was she saw so worth bursting in here like this. Surely it was something from him world, and if she saw him acting as that twisted mockery of himself, who knows what he might have done. Did he kill the Winchesters?

He listened to her confusing, disjointed explanation, his concern about harming the brothers fading away when she began to speak. He just didn't understand what she was talking about. Something happened to him, and he died? He could handle that. That wasn't terrible; in fact, that was really okay.

But then she moved and struck his arm, and told him he woke up... And he was so, utterly confused. Head tilting to the side, he looks at her in pure puzzlement. "I... I don't understand."

[marsfireignite]

"What is there to not understand, you -- "

But Rei seemed to get a grip, abruptly, and drew in a breath to calm herself. Now that she knew -- no, she was certain -- that everything was going to be okay, she could try to focus long enough to explain properly.

"I was in that basement," Rei said, choosing to start over, "where I saw you open Purgatory. But it was different, this time, because you were -- you. You still had the souls, and you looked like you had just fought a war, but you were you." It was said with such conviction that it was impossible to second-guess her. Castiel was himself -- or, well, as close to himself as he could be, with all that was raging within him. He was in control of his own mind again. "I don't know how you did it, but you did, and when you let them all go, you collapsed, and I thought you were dead, but then you just...woke up, don't you get it?"

And Rei took his arms to shake him gently, a grin forming.

"You fought back. You did it. You put them all back."

[wingsandwill]

When she explained it that time, it made more sense, at least as far as the progression went. The subject matter, though... He couldn't believe it. He'd... He'd come back to himself, he'd released the souls, and he'd survived?

Was that even possible? How had he done such a thing? He was shocked, completely; he'd written off this possible future--which he called such to give himself hope he could change it, but didn't doubt would likely be the course if he returned home without memories of this place--as one in which he was doomed, either as a monster or dead. He had never expected he might manage to claw his way back to his senses and make things right; as right as it could be made, anyway.

Castiel let Rei shake him, rocking with the motion, trying to process. "I did it...?" And then something else she'd said struck him, and he spoke up again. "You said that Dean was there?"

[marsfireignite]

"You did it," Rei repeatedly warmly, allowing him the chance to absorb what she had just told him. It was a little incredible to believe -- and Rei herself doubted what she had seen when she woke up, but there was no questioning it, and Rei knew better than to ever question her gift. "And yeah, he was, why wouldn't he be? That man, Bobby, was there, too." Rei paused and her brow furrowed slightly in thought. "I didn't see Sam... but he might have been behind me, where I was in the room -- I'm sure he was there, too -- but yeah, of course Dean was there."

Dean giving up on Castiel was never in the question for her. The man might have his faults, but Rei always viewed him as a stoutly loyal individual, and giving up on your friends was something Rei could never see him doing. After all, she certainly wouldn't -- and hadn't -- given up on Castiel. Why would he?

But after a moment of contemplation, Rei shook his arm again, her grin back in place.

"You can afford a smile, you know," Rei said with some amount of teasing amusement.

[wingsandwill]

Because after what he'd done, why would Dean ever want to be around him? And Bobby too? Sam was surely there, at least he hoped, taking Rei's reassurance about the reason she didn't see him at face value, because where one brother was surely the other was too.

This was... It was overwhelming, but in a good way. The news was good. He almost couldn't believe it, but if she was sure that this was indeed a vision, he wouldn't doubt that. And this was something to be happy about.

At her last comment, he does smile and then more than that he laughed, quietly and out of relief more than anything else, but still. He never expected this. And it had been a long time since he'd felt this hopeful.

[marsfireignite]

She stared at him for a moment or two, at the laugh, a little startled, before her grin widened a little, tugging the angel into a hug. He certainly deserved it, from what she had seen -- and hopefully the knowledge would help in the future. Somehow. For once.

"I should start charging for this," she muttered, but it was free of actual irritation or malice.

[wingsandwill]

Castiel let her hug him, not minding in the slightest, returning it just a little. The smile is still lingering on his face, eyes closed, still overwhelmed by the news but it was incredible. Something had gone right. He'd done something right, and not just right, but something amazing.

Even if he hadn't done it yet, he was capable of it. He had that to hold on to now, and suddenly everything felt so much easier. At her comment, he gave another faint laugh, responding quietly. "Perhaps you should. It would be worth paying for."

[marsfireignite]

"People do pay me for it at home," Rei said lightly, letting him go with a snort of laughter, "but I hate doing it for that. I feel like a circus monkey when people pay to hear fortunes. Besides, most people think I'm full of it and don't believe me anyway. Joke's on them, I guess."

It was odd, seeing Castiel -- quite nearly carefree. It was like seeing an invisible weight being lifted from his shoulders -- one that you didn't quite notice until it was gone. And Rei felt another sense of relief wash through her, a certain gratefulness for her gift, before her grin softened slightly.

"So what are you going to do?" she asked, looking up at him almost imploringly.

[wingsandwill]

"I don't know." Castiel answered her question, but it wasn't the usual hopeless, lost tone he normally had when he said those words. It was simply that he hadn't thought about it, hadn't at all had a chance to make any sort of plan looking forward.

"It changes things." An understatement, but he had to say it. Because it did. Knowing this changed everything for him, immediately.

[marsfireignite]

Rei grinned at him before taking a seat on his bed, carefully picking up Adva to avoid disturbing her or waking her up. Cupping the kitten in the palms of her hands, she looks up at the angel, pleased.

"She's getting fat, I think you feed her too much," Rei said lightly, gently stroking the kitten. "And I'm glad," she added, grin softening into a warm smile. "I was getting tired of you being depressed."

[wingsandwill]

Adva slept on blissfully, completely unaware of the change in position or the person holding her, giving off a tiny kitten purr as she did so.

"I don't." He protested immediately, though the kitten was slightly chubby. Hey, he'd been keeping on feeding her, taking care of the small creature as a distraction and for something he could do right. Only it seemed it wasn't the only thing he could do correctly after all.

Rei's last comment though, he tilted his head slightly at and was about to refute, but then he stopped. He hadn't really recognized it as such, but that was indeed exactly what he'd been, for so many reason. He hadn't been aware it had been enough to bother Rei, though, and he couldn't say all the feelings he had were gone; it was far too early for that. But he did feel like things looked brighter than they had in a long time. "It was unintentional."

[marsfireignite]

"Being depressed usually is," Rei said mildly, fingers gently massaging the kitten's sides. "Everyone gets depressed. It's normal."

She was -- a constant plaguing in the back of her head. It was sometimes hard to keep going, after living in Adstringendum for so long. Getting out of bed was difficult on some days, falling asleep before three nearly impossible on others, but Rei kept most of that to herself. She found strength to go on so long as no one else knew how difficult it was to keep going on. The moment people knew, the moment she would stop going. She had too many people relying on her to quit.

[wingsandwill]

Castiel really wasn't aware, not that attuned to such things in other people, and not predisposed to recognize them; he was used to depressed behavior as the norm, considering how long he'd known the Winchester brothers. He himself was a mess of conflicting emotions at the moment, but they weren't all negative this time which was something unusual for him, though it was distracting and made it a little difficult to focus on what to say or what to do now.

So instead he just sat down on the bed next to Rei, glancing over at her. "Thank you."

[marsfireignite]

Rei was quiet for a moment, gently tickling Adva's ears, before she smiled faintly down at the small fuzzy creature.

"It's good to see something nice for a change."