MOVING TOO FAST
It's quite funny how one day your life can be completely normal, and the next, you're in some place you never thought you'de be. I'm all unpacked, and now, there's no turning back on what i've done. I'm enrolled in school, set up my room, and even bought a ton of food that I, the picky, vegitarian, cranberryjuice loving, lesbian addition to the "family", need. So what now? I don't understand fully why I'm even here. I wanted out on my family. I wanted out on my school. I think I just wanted out on my life completely so I wouldn't feel so god damned depressed. But, I'm more of a wreck than ever! I'm full of angst, and I'm really nervous about school. What if everyone hates me and thinks I'm a dumbass. Oh wait, I don't care what people think of me, I forgot. But really, I don't care what people think of me. I'm content with myself, and who I am, and I know I have plenty of friends back home. But it fucking sucks when you walk through the halls and everyone stares at you and talks about you. When people talk about you AND YOU'RE RIGHT THERE. And just to top off making this whole transition-from-hell-that's-supposed-to-make-my-life-so-much-better, I'm going to an uber conservative school, and my mother is forcing me to dress weird [even though I don't even live with her anymore?!] What is this? I wan't someone to talk to. But oh, wait, I don't know ANYONE here, and, I'm forbidden from telling ANYONE I'm gay. Will I listen. Probably not. Obviously I'm not going to walk through the halls shouting "Look at me, I'm a fucking homosexual!" But it can't hurt to tell people if they ask, I suppose. Or maybe it will. Maybe everyone will shun me for being myself before they even get to know me like everyother two-faced bitch on this earth. Story of my life. My own mother even hates me. I hate to sit hear and whine, but I think I get the right after being kicked out of my fucking house for abso-fucking-lutely nothing. What a surprize. Call me, visit me, text me, fucking, do something. I need to talk to someone. Now. Before I go completely mad, and have read every book in my NEW room. That's what I'll be doing until I get a fucking life up here. So thanks everyone. You're awesome really. I love moving away from everything I know and love just for being a god damned homosexual. It's quite fun.