Restless slumbers | self para
"My mind is growing numb
To the whole world I'm in
And all my senses drowned
By memories of what scares me most"
He adjusted the scarf around his neck better, never stopping, always facing forwards, his feet hitting the dark concrete below him louder than he would have liked. “Don’t look at anyone in the eyes, don’t stop walking, act like you weren’t scared to dead” he chanted in his mind. He cursed himself and his nonexistent sense of direction. “How can you be so stupid, Erik!”
He had decided it would be a good idea to go for a walk; he liked to walk after all, and he hadn’t been around the city yet. He hadn’t been around the city yet. It took him several months to not get lost when going to the city back at home. Why hadn’t he thought he could get lost in here, an unknown place? He almost scoffed at his own idiocy; almost, because he didn’t want to draw attention to himself.
Somehow he had ended up on what looked like a slum. Everyone around here seemed drug addicts, drunkards or criminals. In any other moment he would have reprimanded himself for being so discriminative, but right now he couldn’t care less. The sun was already hiding, and he was hungry, tired and, to be honest, scared. At least to himself he could admit it; he was a coward. It was one of the things he hated the most about himself, but what could he do? He was a weak person, physically and emotionally. He couldn’t defend himself, at least not in a situation like this one.
He took a turn to the left and found himself on a dead end. The smoke of a cigarette was the only thing visible in the dark. Suddenly there were shining eyes looking at him and below them the gleam of what he thought to be a penknife. Without needing to think twice he turned around and began running with all his might. Fast footsteps could be heard behind him; the man was following him.
Turning on a corner his eyes widened, at least, his salvation! “Taxi!” he shouted, relieve obvious in his features. The car stopped in front of him almost immediately and he got in as fast as possible, slamming the door shut after him. It was then when he noticed something wasn’t right, there was a tickling sensation on his hand. He looked down and found the seat full of worms and cockroaches. He removed his hand from there and averted his gaze towards the driver. And then he screamed.
He woke up with a start, a bit disorientated at first before noticing he was sitting on his bed, safe. He slumped back down and put his arm against his forehead, his heart still beating furiously on his chest. Of course it was a dream; it was all too weird to be real. But as he closed his eyes the driver’s face appeared, the image still too clear on his mind; void eyes, rotten flesh, worms going out of his mouth and ears… Just remembering it was making him feel sick.
Knowing he wouldn’t be able to fall asleep again he got up and stretched his limbs, planning to get ready for another day of work.