well i'm sick
well i'm sick and it sucks i've been not feeling good for days and then yesterday i puked a couple of time and this evening i just feel like crap i dont know what it is it sucks and you know i dont think anybody reads this cause i didn't get single comment when i asked people to comment on my last entry i dont even know why i even update i gusse its for my own benfit but it doesn't really help me at cause my life sucks some times i wish i feel asleep and never woke up thats how feel a lot time and no i'm not saying sucide or anything like that i'm just saying i wish i would never wake up and be in a coma for a couple of months cause mabey then people would care and pay attention to me. I mention this new group that i have been hanging out with at school well it just feels like i dont belong there and i gusse that what it always feels like when i hang out with a group of people and i always feel like my life is chaos and something is always going wrong or some one is always on my case about something and it sucks cause the only time i feel at peace is when i'm in my room at night either playing on my computer or reading but right now there is nothing to read and for some reason not many games are keeping my intrest which sucks. Then my room is mess and i can seem to be able to clean it and keep it clean which i gusse it my fault but it still is in transtion and i still want to paint it i still havn't gotten my bed which sucks so i'm sleeping on my mattress on the floor the mattress is very nice so its not too bad. I just need a big change in my life cuase it seems like its the same thing every week which greatly sucks i need a big change like getting a gf that would help me foucs on what i need to do i also need a new job. I would love a big change like moving which maybe sooner then i think cause my parents are considering moving to the east coast and if they did i would move with them. I think i'm going to make a big change this weekend some if you read this and see me a lot look for a change. I also considering a tattoo but i dont know what to get and all i want is something small like on my shoulder but i dont know what to get so any suggestions i'm thinking about an 8 or a J but i need some what of type or design something that i would like for a very long time since it would be permant so i dont know so. I just need somthing to change in my life but i dont know and i know i just cant sit around and wait for it to happen i need to take charge an do somthing and not be passive about my life i sort have been taking charge right now with my ADD and stuff so i think my first step is finding a new job and quiting my job i have now cause it is causing me a lot of problems just cause i dont enjoy it at all well i think this is a long enought post and i doubt any body going to read this so i'm going to go clean my room and go to bed and hope i never wake