Make This Go on Forever, Part I
Title: Make This Go on Forever, Part I
Author: Adrianna Coylho
Pairing: Gibbs/Ducky, pre-Gibbs/DiNozzo, post-Gibbs/Fornell
Rating: NC-17
Word Count: 20,058
Spoilers: Up to and including Season 5 Finale.
Warnings: Nothing the rating doesn’t cover...
Summary: Set after the end of Season 5, Gibbs is attempting to work with his new team. When a local school blows up due to a faulty gas mains the team are called in to investigate the deaths of three marines mysteriously on the site. Gibbs’ mind, however, is not on the job after yet another relationship break-up and he turns to his oldest friend for comfort. Inspired by Snow Patrol’s ‘Make This Go on Forever’. Quote taken from lyrics by Gary Lightbody.
Notes: Much love goes to my wonderful beta & friend nakeisha . This was written just after Season Five finished, so it is now AU as far as the new team is concerned.
Fabulous accompanying artwork by kaynyne : Artwork (Illos 2 may not be suitable to open at work ;)
| ~ | Part II | Part III | Part IV | Part V | Part VI | Part VII |
~~~~~~~~~
“Please don’t let this turn into something it’s not.
I can only give you everything I’ve got.
I can’t be as sorry as you think I should.
But I’ll still love you more than anyone else could.”
~~~~~~~~~
Gibbs eyed the team sitting around him in the bullpen as dispatch relayed the pertinent details of the case through the receiver he had pressed to his ear.
“Got it.”
Gibbs hung up, hands already on his gear. He paused. The other agents in the room hadn’t even noticed his movements yet, never mind followed suit.
“Gear up.”
He’d tried to put an edge on the phrase to turn it into an order these agents might actually respond to, but the weariness dulled the effect somewhat. He decided to wrap on the desk sharply as he made his way out; maybe that would stir them.
Agents Thomas and Bridge had finally caught on. Agent Jameson just smiled and stood to follow his new team. Gibbs noted with a glance that the experienced agent had indeed already geared up, without drawing undue attention. Gibbs really couldn’t figure out why he had Jameson on his team. The agent was good; good enough for his own team. Gibbs knew from his file that he’d already turned down no fewer than two official offers of such a position. Gibbs had momentarily wondered why, but had quickly switched his thoughts to Tony. Since Jenny’s passing he had managed to ‘update’ himself on his former Senior Agent’s file. Certain things he knew would never make it in there, but he did see, with more than a little pride, that Jen had offered him his own team in Rota. A slight feeling of guilt had soon followed when he reasoned why Tony may have turned it down. Looking back now, he really should have taken it. Gibbs wondered if Tony was thinking the same thing, sitting out there on the USS Ronald Reagan.
As they headed to the garage, Gibbs listened to Agent Bridge talking to Autopsy on her cell. It didn’t seem like she was talking with Ducky. Palmer must have answered unless the young agent had pulled herself together since her last encounter with the ME. Bridge had, for some reason, not known what to do with herself when confronted with the older man. Falling over her words and ‘sir’ing him at every other breath, whilst Ducky had just listened, bemused. He’d asked Gibbs if the girl was like that with suspects. She’d been perfectly capable as far as Gibbs had seen. It had just been when she was around Ducky. Ducky had seemed a little proud of that.
They hit the road in reasonable time, presumably Ducky and Palmer were on their way too. Gibbs tried to turn his attention to the case as he drove, he didn’t need his mind wandering to the events of the night before. This could turn out to be a high profile case anyway; he needed to concentrate.
The school they were going to had been all over the news for the past six hours. A gas mains had exploded taking half the school with it just as the kids had been settled in that morning. NCIS agents had, along with all the other agencies, been requested not to flood the scene in an attempt to help. The number of on and off duty members of the city’s emergency services that had turned up had already made it difficult to coordinate the operation, and that was without considering the swarm of terrified parents and other relatives being held back at the gates. Gibbs was amazed that anyone had thought to call NCIS in the circumstances. There had been so many already brought out in body bags that it seemed strange anyone would have taken note of the fact that the three marines they were coming to collect were out of place.
Approaching what was left of the building on foot, the team had a job finding a way through to the line. Gibbs really didn’t think this was the time to be abruptly pushing past people. As he approached the secured line he looked up at the school sign. His breath hitched a little as he read the name. Damn, why hadn’t he noticed that earlier? Quickly diverting his own thoughts, he kept to the task in hand and addressed the fireman on the right side of the tape as he flashed his badge.
“Gibbs. NCIS. You have three of ours in there somewhere?”
“We have more than three here, buddy. The place is swarming with uniforms that have been helping out since this whole thing started. We can’t let anymore in, we’re overwhelmed as it is…”
“We’ve been asked to attend a crime scene…” Gibbs broke off as he picked out a very familiar silhouette moving out of the building. “We’re with him.” Gibbs gestured towards the ME.
“Him? He’s been here six hours straight, hasn’t stopped.”
Gibbs looked over to Ducky. His face was strained and anxious, his limp far more pronounced than usual. How had Gibbs not noticed he wasn’t at work? Guess he had been too involved in his own head after last night. At that moment Ducky looked up and caught his eye. No more than a tired flicker of recognition crossed his face. Ducky turned back to the patient he had been assessing as they carried him out before moving over to the tape.
“Jethro.”
“Duck?”
“I’ve heard why you might be coming, I’m sorry I wasn’t able to call it in myself. It’s been… fraught.”
Gibbs reached over the tape and gently squeezed Ducky’s shoulder.
“You have no reason to apologise, Duck.”
Ducky looked tiredly up at him.
“You’d better come through.”
The team followed Gibbs under the tape and across the courtyard after Ducky and a Fire Chief, who had joined them, picking their way through rubble and groups of rescuers. They reached the relative quiet of the scene; this area had already been checked and cleared, though apparently not before these marines had been caught by the delayed fall of some of the structure.
“’Scuse me for leaving you to it, Agent Gibbs, but my concerns are elsewhere...”
“Of course.” Gibbs waved the Fire Chief away. They would work better without disturbance anyway.
Gibbs was glad that his new team had at least some idea of how to go about working a scene together. They seemed to have slotted into roles fairly swiftly. At least that would allow him a little breathing space on this one. He turned his attention to Ducky. He didn’t have any of his usual equipment and was making do on his assessment. Probably what he had been doing all day. Gibbs cursed as he realised that there was no way Palmer was going to be able to find his way through to them on his own. The timid young man was probably stuck behind the crowds at the entrance, either that or he was still trying to get the ME’s van anywhere within four blocks of the place. Just when Ducky needed him most too. Typical.
Gibbs crouched beside the ME.
“Anything you can tell me, Duck?”
His tone was softer than usual. Ducky looked up at him.
“What can I say, Jethro? It appears these two were crushed to death by this beam. That young man however…” Ducky struggled to get up before moving across to the third marine. “Isn’t under or near any of the debris.”
Ducky knelt again to inspect the third body.
“He has had similar injuries, but quite some time before our other two.” Ducky paused as he studied bruising on the marine’s arms. “He’s been moved, Jethro.”
Jameson had been surveying the scene. “Not unlikely, Doctor, maybe these two found him and moved him out from under some of this and dislodged the rest. Unfortunate, but not unlikely.”
Gibbs and Ducky exchanged a look.
“Yeah. Okay Jameson you process it. Thomas, go find Mr. Palmer and help him.”
Gibbs paused restlessly for a moment. Ducky watched him as the younger man seemed to be trying to make a decision.
“Have you spoken to Tobias yet, Jethro?”
“Duck…” Gibbs crouched down next to Ducky again and waited until the other agents were far enough away to be out of earshot. “Tobias and I… parted company last night. So no, I haven’t spoken to him.”
Ducky looked at him, somewhat reproachfully. His tone was a little less than friendly when he spoke.
“For Goodness sake, Jethro, I think that’s been trumped by Emily’s school being reduced to rubble.”
~~~~~~~~~
Gibbs finally reached a spot out of earshot of everyone that still kept him in good visual contact. Pulling out his cell, he didn’t pause to think. He pressed and held a button. Speed dial worked its magic. He was kind of glad that McGee had shown him that. As much as he hadn’t enjoyed being shown reams of seemingly pointless functions by his junior agent, he had ended up using many of them and right now it was kind of a comfort to think of his old team. It was almost as if McGee was still hovering over him as he used it. This particular occasion it definitely helped. Pressing one key instead of ten meant that was nine less chances to hang up. The cell rang a few times before Tobias picked up. He didn’t give Gibbs a chance to speak.
“She’s fine, Jethro. I’d have called if anything had happened to her, you know that.”
“Do I, Tobias? Would you...?” Gibbs held back.
There was momentary silence.
“Yes, Jethro. I would have... But no, it wouldn’t have been to use you for comfort, I wouldn’t have taken you back. We’re through. We were clear on that.”
“Toby... You wouldn’t have been using me... I”
“I know, I know... just, leave it. Emily’s fine. She wasn’t even in school today - Diane said she felt ill this morning, didn’t take her in...” Gibbs could almost hear Tobias thinking. “We’ll talk another time, Jethro. I have to go... Thanks for your concern.” The last was an afterthought, but Gibbs took it in the genuine spirit it was meant.
Pushing the cell back into his pocket, Gibbs felt their relationship slip a little further back in his mind. It was over and what it had been was fading into memory already. He looked up. The first figure he picked out was that of Ducky, crouching over a body. His eyes were always drawn to the smaller man, his old friend. Ducky looked up. Gibbs nodded to him. Ducky turned his lips up a little and gave a single nod in acknowledgement. Emily was okay, that was all that mattered.
~~~~~~~~
Scene processed, Gibbs watched his team pack up. Palmer thankfully had had enough sense to take the bulk of the workload off Ducky without being coaxed to. Still Ducky looked weary, worryingly so.
“Stop looking at me like that, Jethro. I know I look a fright, you don’t have to remind me.” Ducky managed a weak smile. “You talked to Tobias...” His tone was softer now.
“Yeah.”
“I’m sorry I was so abrupt with you. It just seemed like you needed a bit of a shove to do the right thing.” Ducky looked genuinely remorseful.
“No apologies, Duck.” Gibbs ran a hand across Ducky’s shoulders in comfort. “And you don’t look that bad.” Gibbs grinned down at him.
Ducky laughed a little. “Well I have to admit I am feeling it.” He acknowledged, as low under his breath as he could whilst still enabling his friend to hear. Gibbs squeezed Duck’s shoulder a little.
“Come on, Duck, let me take you home.”
Ducky looked up to object but reconsidered as the movement caused him quite some pain.
“Okay, I submit.” He gave Gibbs a thankful smile before packing his young assistant off with the final bits and pieces.
Gibbs waited until they had finished up before returning to the doctor’s side. He made a point of letting the others get a head start on them.
“About set, Duck?”
“Yes, Jethro.”
As the pair walked back through what was left of the building, Gibbs watched his companion carefully. They had both been through the mill over the past twenty-four hours, for very different reasons, but nonetheless both of them were emotionally even more than physically tired. Gibbs watched Ducky for signs of discomfort. He wasn’t one to complain, Gibbs knew, but Gibbs’ real concern was how Ducky was feeling. Cases which involved children always affected him badly, more so than he ever truly admitted - even to Gibbs. But Gibbs could see it. He could see the effect the day’s events had had on him. The way he held himself; falsely upright, determinedly striding, when it was clear he’d rather allow the sorrow to pull him down, allow the feeling to overwhelm him so that he could grieve. Gibbs made a mental note that he would need to give Ducky space to mourn. Be close, but give him space.
Gibbs followed the worldly doctor back through the dissipating crowds at the gate. People were still wandering in dribs and drabs. The building was all but cleared of casualties now. Most visitors were there to lay flowers, a carpet of which had grown in place of the crowd since they had last been out here. It was reaching these that showed a little of Ducky’s resolve beginning to fade. He put a hand to his mouth, stopping for a moment to take in the hundreds of blooms and messages of carefully chosen words of farewell. Gibbs let him be. He would comfort him in private. Reaching out to him now would only make him breakdown completely and he knew Duck wouldn’t want that.
Ducky made a gesture with his hand towards the scene as if he wanted to say something, but the words didn’t come. Gibbs nodded his understanding as full eyes turned to look up at him. The two of them stood for a moment longer, before moving away, carefully picking their way through back onto the street. Ducky managed a block before beginning to lean into his friend. Gibbs finally put an arm around him and pulled him in as they walked. Gibbs let his own tears fall, remembering his own experience of losing Kelly, as he felt the erratic movement of Ducky’s chest against him.
~~~~~~~~~
As they pulled up to Ducky’s home in Reston, the last of the day’s light was disappearing over the horizon. Ducky sat in the passenger seat, gearing himself up to move when the car came to a halt. The weariness always hit him more once he was actually home and always a little prematurely. He was a little ashamed to admit that he’d ended up sitting out in his Morgan for quite a few minutes before making his way inside on some particularly tiresome nights. Not wishing this night to be one of them and unsure of Jethro’s intentions, he might have wanted to get home quickly himself, Ducky unbelted and pushed open the door straight away.
Coming round the front, Ducky smiled at Jethro as he followed him out of the car.
“Thank you, Jethro. I really appreciate it, especially... well.” Ducky gestured awkwardly. He hadn’t meant to bring it up. He changed tack. “Would you like to come in?”
“Yeah, Duck.” Jethro knew where Duck had been headed with that sentence, but he let it lie. “I wouldn’t mind.”
The pair headed up into the house. Jethro couldn’t help but glance in the direction of Mrs. Mallard’s bedroom, or what had been her bedroom until last year, as he passed through the hallway. He corrected himself quickly, but Ducky noticed.
“It’s okay, dear. Even I still do it sometimes and I’m here all the time. Drink?” Ducky’s offer was not an unusual one, but his voice betrayed how tired he was.
“I’ll get us a drink, Duck, you go ahead and clean up.”
Ducky looked at Jethro for a second, then nodded his agreement. Jethro always seemed to know what was on his mind and right now it was indeed the thought of hot water pelting down onto his tired body. He wouldn’t mind being served a drink either. It was one of the small pleasures of having company, especially company like Jethro, who felt as at home at Ducky’s as he did at his own.
Jethro made to move into the sitting room as Ducky made his way up the stairs. Jethro paused, his hand on the doorframe, as he watched his friend. He was clearly having a lot of trouble and not just with his bad leg. Jethro decided they both might be in need of a little TLC. He himself needed the company more than he’d realised. The prospect of an empty house after the last twenty-four hours wasn’t a pretty one. He thought of all those parents suffering tonight as he had all those years ago. It broke his heart. Thank God for friends like Duck. Jethro just hoped he’d be as much use to Ducky, as Ducky was being for him, by just being here. Drinks fixed, Jethro made his way into the kitchen to see what he could rustle up in Ducky’s absence.
~~~~~~~~
| ~ | Part II | Part III | Part IV | Part V | Part VI | Part VII |
Author: Adrianna Coylho
Pairing: Gibbs/Ducky, pre-Gibbs/DiNozzo, post-Gibbs/Fornell
Rating: NC-17
Word Count: 20,058
Spoilers: Up to and including Season 5 Finale.
Warnings: Nothing the rating doesn’t cover...
Summary: Set after the end of Season 5, Gibbs is attempting to work with his new team. When a local school blows up due to a faulty gas mains the team are called in to investigate the deaths of three marines mysteriously on the site. Gibbs’ mind, however, is not on the job after yet another relationship break-up and he turns to his oldest friend for comfort. Inspired by Snow Patrol’s ‘Make This Go on Forever’. Quote taken from lyrics by Gary Lightbody.
Notes: Much love goes to my wonderful beta & friend nakeisha . This was written just after Season Five finished, so it is now AU as far as the new team is concerned.
Fabulous accompanying artwork by kaynyne : Artwork (Illos 2 may not be suitable to open at work ;)
| ~ | Part II | Part III | Part IV | Part V | Part VI | Part VII |
~~~~~~~~~
“Please don’t let this turn into something it’s not.
I can only give you everything I’ve got.
I can’t be as sorry as you think I should.
But I’ll still love you more than anyone else could.”
~~~~~~~~~
Gibbs eyed the team sitting around him in the bullpen as dispatch relayed the pertinent details of the case through the receiver he had pressed to his ear.
“Got it.”
Gibbs hung up, hands already on his gear. He paused. The other agents in the room hadn’t even noticed his movements yet, never mind followed suit.
“Gear up.”
He’d tried to put an edge on the phrase to turn it into an order these agents might actually respond to, but the weariness dulled the effect somewhat. He decided to wrap on the desk sharply as he made his way out; maybe that would stir them.
Agents Thomas and Bridge had finally caught on. Agent Jameson just smiled and stood to follow his new team. Gibbs noted with a glance that the experienced agent had indeed already geared up, without drawing undue attention. Gibbs really couldn’t figure out why he had Jameson on his team. The agent was good; good enough for his own team. Gibbs knew from his file that he’d already turned down no fewer than two official offers of such a position. Gibbs had momentarily wondered why, but had quickly switched his thoughts to Tony. Since Jenny’s passing he had managed to ‘update’ himself on his former Senior Agent’s file. Certain things he knew would never make it in there, but he did see, with more than a little pride, that Jen had offered him his own team in Rota. A slight feeling of guilt had soon followed when he reasoned why Tony may have turned it down. Looking back now, he really should have taken it. Gibbs wondered if Tony was thinking the same thing, sitting out there on the USS Ronald Reagan.
As they headed to the garage, Gibbs listened to Agent Bridge talking to Autopsy on her cell. It didn’t seem like she was talking with Ducky. Palmer must have answered unless the young agent had pulled herself together since her last encounter with the ME. Bridge had, for some reason, not known what to do with herself when confronted with the older man. Falling over her words and ‘sir’ing him at every other breath, whilst Ducky had just listened, bemused. He’d asked Gibbs if the girl was like that with suspects. She’d been perfectly capable as far as Gibbs had seen. It had just been when she was around Ducky. Ducky had seemed a little proud of that.
They hit the road in reasonable time, presumably Ducky and Palmer were on their way too. Gibbs tried to turn his attention to the case as he drove, he didn’t need his mind wandering to the events of the night before. This could turn out to be a high profile case anyway; he needed to concentrate.
The school they were going to had been all over the news for the past six hours. A gas mains had exploded taking half the school with it just as the kids had been settled in that morning. NCIS agents had, along with all the other agencies, been requested not to flood the scene in an attempt to help. The number of on and off duty members of the city’s emergency services that had turned up had already made it difficult to coordinate the operation, and that was without considering the swarm of terrified parents and other relatives being held back at the gates. Gibbs was amazed that anyone had thought to call NCIS in the circumstances. There had been so many already brought out in body bags that it seemed strange anyone would have taken note of the fact that the three marines they were coming to collect were out of place.
Approaching what was left of the building on foot, the team had a job finding a way through to the line. Gibbs really didn’t think this was the time to be abruptly pushing past people. As he approached the secured line he looked up at the school sign. His breath hitched a little as he read the name. Damn, why hadn’t he noticed that earlier? Quickly diverting his own thoughts, he kept to the task in hand and addressed the fireman on the right side of the tape as he flashed his badge.
“Gibbs. NCIS. You have three of ours in there somewhere?”
“We have more than three here, buddy. The place is swarming with uniforms that have been helping out since this whole thing started. We can’t let anymore in, we’re overwhelmed as it is…”
“We’ve been asked to attend a crime scene…” Gibbs broke off as he picked out a very familiar silhouette moving out of the building. “We’re with him.” Gibbs gestured towards the ME.
“Him? He’s been here six hours straight, hasn’t stopped.”
Gibbs looked over to Ducky. His face was strained and anxious, his limp far more pronounced than usual. How had Gibbs not noticed he wasn’t at work? Guess he had been too involved in his own head after last night. At that moment Ducky looked up and caught his eye. No more than a tired flicker of recognition crossed his face. Ducky turned back to the patient he had been assessing as they carried him out before moving over to the tape.
“Jethro.”
“Duck?”
“I’ve heard why you might be coming, I’m sorry I wasn’t able to call it in myself. It’s been… fraught.”
Gibbs reached over the tape and gently squeezed Ducky’s shoulder.
“You have no reason to apologise, Duck.”
Ducky looked tiredly up at him.
“You’d better come through.”
The team followed Gibbs under the tape and across the courtyard after Ducky and a Fire Chief, who had joined them, picking their way through rubble and groups of rescuers. They reached the relative quiet of the scene; this area had already been checked and cleared, though apparently not before these marines had been caught by the delayed fall of some of the structure.
“’Scuse me for leaving you to it, Agent Gibbs, but my concerns are elsewhere...”
“Of course.” Gibbs waved the Fire Chief away. They would work better without disturbance anyway.
Gibbs was glad that his new team had at least some idea of how to go about working a scene together. They seemed to have slotted into roles fairly swiftly. At least that would allow him a little breathing space on this one. He turned his attention to Ducky. He didn’t have any of his usual equipment and was making do on his assessment. Probably what he had been doing all day. Gibbs cursed as he realised that there was no way Palmer was going to be able to find his way through to them on his own. The timid young man was probably stuck behind the crowds at the entrance, either that or he was still trying to get the ME’s van anywhere within four blocks of the place. Just when Ducky needed him most too. Typical.
Gibbs crouched beside the ME.
“Anything you can tell me, Duck?”
His tone was softer than usual. Ducky looked up at him.
“What can I say, Jethro? It appears these two were crushed to death by this beam. That young man however…” Ducky struggled to get up before moving across to the third marine. “Isn’t under or near any of the debris.”
Ducky knelt again to inspect the third body.
“He has had similar injuries, but quite some time before our other two.” Ducky paused as he studied bruising on the marine’s arms. “He’s been moved, Jethro.”
Jameson had been surveying the scene. “Not unlikely, Doctor, maybe these two found him and moved him out from under some of this and dislodged the rest. Unfortunate, but not unlikely.”
Gibbs and Ducky exchanged a look.
“Yeah. Okay Jameson you process it. Thomas, go find Mr. Palmer and help him.”
Gibbs paused restlessly for a moment. Ducky watched him as the younger man seemed to be trying to make a decision.
“Have you spoken to Tobias yet, Jethro?”
“Duck…” Gibbs crouched down next to Ducky again and waited until the other agents were far enough away to be out of earshot. “Tobias and I… parted company last night. So no, I haven’t spoken to him.”
Ducky looked at him, somewhat reproachfully. His tone was a little less than friendly when he spoke.
“For Goodness sake, Jethro, I think that’s been trumped by Emily’s school being reduced to rubble.”
~~~~~~~~~
Gibbs finally reached a spot out of earshot of everyone that still kept him in good visual contact. Pulling out his cell, he didn’t pause to think. He pressed and held a button. Speed dial worked its magic. He was kind of glad that McGee had shown him that. As much as he hadn’t enjoyed being shown reams of seemingly pointless functions by his junior agent, he had ended up using many of them and right now it was kind of a comfort to think of his old team. It was almost as if McGee was still hovering over him as he used it. This particular occasion it definitely helped. Pressing one key instead of ten meant that was nine less chances to hang up. The cell rang a few times before Tobias picked up. He didn’t give Gibbs a chance to speak.
“She’s fine, Jethro. I’d have called if anything had happened to her, you know that.”
“Do I, Tobias? Would you...?” Gibbs held back.
There was momentary silence.
“Yes, Jethro. I would have... But no, it wouldn’t have been to use you for comfort, I wouldn’t have taken you back. We’re through. We were clear on that.”
“Toby... You wouldn’t have been using me... I”
“I know, I know... just, leave it. Emily’s fine. She wasn’t even in school today - Diane said she felt ill this morning, didn’t take her in...” Gibbs could almost hear Tobias thinking. “We’ll talk another time, Jethro. I have to go... Thanks for your concern.” The last was an afterthought, but Gibbs took it in the genuine spirit it was meant.
Pushing the cell back into his pocket, Gibbs felt their relationship slip a little further back in his mind. It was over and what it had been was fading into memory already. He looked up. The first figure he picked out was that of Ducky, crouching over a body. His eyes were always drawn to the smaller man, his old friend. Ducky looked up. Gibbs nodded to him. Ducky turned his lips up a little and gave a single nod in acknowledgement. Emily was okay, that was all that mattered.
~~~~~~~~
Scene processed, Gibbs watched his team pack up. Palmer thankfully had had enough sense to take the bulk of the workload off Ducky without being coaxed to. Still Ducky looked weary, worryingly so.
“Stop looking at me like that, Jethro. I know I look a fright, you don’t have to remind me.” Ducky managed a weak smile. “You talked to Tobias...” His tone was softer now.
“Yeah.”
“I’m sorry I was so abrupt with you. It just seemed like you needed a bit of a shove to do the right thing.” Ducky looked genuinely remorseful.
“No apologies, Duck.” Gibbs ran a hand across Ducky’s shoulders in comfort. “And you don’t look that bad.” Gibbs grinned down at him.
Ducky laughed a little. “Well I have to admit I am feeling it.” He acknowledged, as low under his breath as he could whilst still enabling his friend to hear. Gibbs squeezed Duck’s shoulder a little.
“Come on, Duck, let me take you home.”
Ducky looked up to object but reconsidered as the movement caused him quite some pain.
“Okay, I submit.” He gave Gibbs a thankful smile before packing his young assistant off with the final bits and pieces.
Gibbs waited until they had finished up before returning to the doctor’s side. He made a point of letting the others get a head start on them.
“About set, Duck?”
“Yes, Jethro.”
As the pair walked back through what was left of the building, Gibbs watched his companion carefully. They had both been through the mill over the past twenty-four hours, for very different reasons, but nonetheless both of them were emotionally even more than physically tired. Gibbs watched Ducky for signs of discomfort. He wasn’t one to complain, Gibbs knew, but Gibbs’ real concern was how Ducky was feeling. Cases which involved children always affected him badly, more so than he ever truly admitted - even to Gibbs. But Gibbs could see it. He could see the effect the day’s events had had on him. The way he held himself; falsely upright, determinedly striding, when it was clear he’d rather allow the sorrow to pull him down, allow the feeling to overwhelm him so that he could grieve. Gibbs made a mental note that he would need to give Ducky space to mourn. Be close, but give him space.
Gibbs followed the worldly doctor back through the dissipating crowds at the gate. People were still wandering in dribs and drabs. The building was all but cleared of casualties now. Most visitors were there to lay flowers, a carpet of which had grown in place of the crowd since they had last been out here. It was reaching these that showed a little of Ducky’s resolve beginning to fade. He put a hand to his mouth, stopping for a moment to take in the hundreds of blooms and messages of carefully chosen words of farewell. Gibbs let him be. He would comfort him in private. Reaching out to him now would only make him breakdown completely and he knew Duck wouldn’t want that.
Ducky made a gesture with his hand towards the scene as if he wanted to say something, but the words didn’t come. Gibbs nodded his understanding as full eyes turned to look up at him. The two of them stood for a moment longer, before moving away, carefully picking their way through back onto the street. Ducky managed a block before beginning to lean into his friend. Gibbs finally put an arm around him and pulled him in as they walked. Gibbs let his own tears fall, remembering his own experience of losing Kelly, as he felt the erratic movement of Ducky’s chest against him.
~~~~~~~~~
As they pulled up to Ducky’s home in Reston, the last of the day’s light was disappearing over the horizon. Ducky sat in the passenger seat, gearing himself up to move when the car came to a halt. The weariness always hit him more once he was actually home and always a little prematurely. He was a little ashamed to admit that he’d ended up sitting out in his Morgan for quite a few minutes before making his way inside on some particularly tiresome nights. Not wishing this night to be one of them and unsure of Jethro’s intentions, he might have wanted to get home quickly himself, Ducky unbelted and pushed open the door straight away.
Coming round the front, Ducky smiled at Jethro as he followed him out of the car.
“Thank you, Jethro. I really appreciate it, especially... well.” Ducky gestured awkwardly. He hadn’t meant to bring it up. He changed tack. “Would you like to come in?”
“Yeah, Duck.” Jethro knew where Duck had been headed with that sentence, but he let it lie. “I wouldn’t mind.”
The pair headed up into the house. Jethro couldn’t help but glance in the direction of Mrs. Mallard’s bedroom, or what had been her bedroom until last year, as he passed through the hallway. He corrected himself quickly, but Ducky noticed.
“It’s okay, dear. Even I still do it sometimes and I’m here all the time. Drink?” Ducky’s offer was not an unusual one, but his voice betrayed how tired he was.
“I’ll get us a drink, Duck, you go ahead and clean up.”
Ducky looked at Jethro for a second, then nodded his agreement. Jethro always seemed to know what was on his mind and right now it was indeed the thought of hot water pelting down onto his tired body. He wouldn’t mind being served a drink either. It was one of the small pleasures of having company, especially company like Jethro, who felt as at home at Ducky’s as he did at his own.
Jethro made to move into the sitting room as Ducky made his way up the stairs. Jethro paused, his hand on the doorframe, as he watched his friend. He was clearly having a lot of trouble and not just with his bad leg. Jethro decided they both might be in need of a little TLC. He himself needed the company more than he’d realised. The prospect of an empty house after the last twenty-four hours wasn’t a pretty one. He thought of all those parents suffering tonight as he had all those years ago. It broke his heart. Thank God for friends like Duck. Jethro just hoped he’d be as much use to Ducky, as Ducky was being for him, by just being here. Drinks fixed, Jethro made his way into the kitchen to see what he could rustle up in Ducky’s absence.
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| ~ | Part II | Part III | Part IV | Part V | Part VI | Part VII |