Minnie
Wherever you are, send Minnie love. She is nearing the very end of her journey through this life and I want her to feel love from everywhere, because I can't be by her side right now.
Minnie has always been the most amazing companion, friend, familiy. I remember when she was 4 months old, I carried her in my arms from the breeders house to the car. I remember it so vividly. From that moment, in June of 1998, we were together. I was her family and she was mine. I gave her unending and all-consuming love and she gave me nothing less. I named her Minuet after Beethoven's Minuet in G. Because she had a musical quality about her, a beauty that touched somewhere deep inside.
Minnie always came to me when I cried. We had our own language. When she was a puppy and she whined for her mom, when she was scared those first few nights, I had her in her crate next to my bed, I would get out of bed in the middle of the night and press my face to hers and say "bashi bashi." I don't know what it meant, it just came to me and it calmed her and it was our special way that nobody else knew to say I love you, I'm here for you, you have nothing to be afraid of because I will always protect you. It meant all of that. It means all of that.
Minnie loved to chase squirrels. Rabbits. Birds. She grew up on a mountainside in southern california. She was always "birdy" as we say in the golden retriever community. She couldn't keep her eyes off of them. One time she caught a rabbit and was just so so proud of herself. she stood at the back door holding it's foot for me and even though it was absolutely disgusting it was just so cute because she was so happy. she really really wanted to show me.
Minnie was so easy to train, it wasn't really like training at all. She just understood what I wanted, and was eager to do it. All she ever asked for in return was a pat on the head, a hug, a kind word. That's all she ever asked for in this entire world, was love. A being content with love. That is what I learned from her.
Minnie was there for me when I was very depressed. I probably wouldn't have lived had I not brought her to New York. I told my birth mother during a fight one time that I needed to bring Minnie with me so that I had a reason to live...so that I had a reason to get up in the morning, to stay alive because she couldn't live without me. I'm no longer depressed. I live every day and am genuinely a happy person, a happiness that comes from within, finally, instead of from other people, or substances, or antidepressants, or therapy. I could not be in the place that I'm in without Minnie's unconditional love.
I've written numerous poems about Minnie since I got her 10 and a half years ago. I suddenly can't find any of them in my journal, though.
If anyone has any pictures of her...I think there are some on facebook, could you email them to me? I would like to see her right now.
To Minnie. To everything you have taught me, without ever uttering a word. To everything you have given me, with just the lift of a paw. To the times you rolled around in the dirt just because it felt good, and all the times you layed on your back trying to catch your tail in your mouth. To the way you tap dance when you're about to get fed, or whenever I come home. I love you so much. You'll always be my pretty puppy girl.
Minnie has always been the most amazing companion, friend, familiy. I remember when she was 4 months old, I carried her in my arms from the breeders house to the car. I remember it so vividly. From that moment, in June of 1998, we were together. I was her family and she was mine. I gave her unending and all-consuming love and she gave me nothing less. I named her Minuet after Beethoven's Minuet in G. Because she had a musical quality about her, a beauty that touched somewhere deep inside.
Minnie always came to me when I cried. We had our own language. When she was a puppy and she whined for her mom, when she was scared those first few nights, I had her in her crate next to my bed, I would get out of bed in the middle of the night and press my face to hers and say "bashi bashi." I don't know what it meant, it just came to me and it calmed her and it was our special way that nobody else knew to say I love you, I'm here for you, you have nothing to be afraid of because I will always protect you. It meant all of that. It means all of that.
Minnie loved to chase squirrels. Rabbits. Birds. She grew up on a mountainside in southern california. She was always "birdy" as we say in the golden retriever community. She couldn't keep her eyes off of them. One time she caught a rabbit and was just so so proud of herself. she stood at the back door holding it's foot for me and even though it was absolutely disgusting it was just so cute because she was so happy. she really really wanted to show me.
Minnie was so easy to train, it wasn't really like training at all. She just understood what I wanted, and was eager to do it. All she ever asked for in return was a pat on the head, a hug, a kind word. That's all she ever asked for in this entire world, was love. A being content with love. That is what I learned from her.
Minnie was there for me when I was very depressed. I probably wouldn't have lived had I not brought her to New York. I told my birth mother during a fight one time that I needed to bring Minnie with me so that I had a reason to live...so that I had a reason to get up in the morning, to stay alive because she couldn't live without me. I'm no longer depressed. I live every day and am genuinely a happy person, a happiness that comes from within, finally, instead of from other people, or substances, or antidepressants, or therapy. I could not be in the place that I'm in without Minnie's unconditional love.
I've written numerous poems about Minnie since I got her 10 and a half years ago. I suddenly can't find any of them in my journal, though.
If anyone has any pictures of her...I think there are some on facebook, could you email them to me? I would like to see her right now.
To Minnie. To everything you have taught me, without ever uttering a word. To everything you have given me, with just the lift of a paw. To the times you rolled around in the dirt just because it felt good, and all the times you layed on your back trying to catch your tail in your mouth. To the way you tap dance when you're about to get fed, or whenever I come home. I love you so much. You'll always be my pretty puppy girl.