A thought on communication
Lately, I've been realising - from somewhat of a new angle, at least - that I'm really not what you'd call a people person. I like living alone. I rarely call people just to chat, and I actually find it quite exhausting to talk to someone I'm not close with for an extended period of time. I need some time to myself everyday, quiet and secluded, and if I can't have that I become ill-tempered and cranky.
People who are, well, from the people-person-faction tend to find that strange. Those who have too little desire to communicate must be stuck-up, nasty sociopaths, maybe planning a killing spree. When I talk to people people and find myself questioned about what I do on weekends and who I hang out with, I involuntarily end up feeling a bit defensive about not attending parties often and not having a large circle of remote acquaintances.
It occurs to me that I shouldn't feel defensive about that -- every person has a natural amount of communication with others that they need and want, and some need and want less than others. That's okay. But I feel defensive anyway, and catch myself wondering, briefly, whether maybe I'm a freak after all, or, having sternly quelled that thought, wondering whether the other person thinks I'm a bit of a loner because I'm actually boring or have an otherwise horrible character and thus nobody wants to communicate or spend time with me.
It bothers me that, in a day and age when many people broadcast even the most unimportant details about their daily lives via twitter and the like, feeling reluctant to communicate endlessly seems to be slowly becoming a social stigma.
(And no, dears, this is not an attack on all the wonderful people around here who share much of their everyday-lives on their blog. Many of you are just as introverted as myself, I know that. I don't mind all the stuff people share; I only mind being expected, by some, to constantly do the same.)
People who are, well, from the people-person-faction tend to find that strange. Those who have too little desire to communicate must be stuck-up, nasty sociopaths, maybe planning a killing spree. When I talk to people people and find myself questioned about what I do on weekends and who I hang out with, I involuntarily end up feeling a bit defensive about not attending parties often and not having a large circle of remote acquaintances.
It occurs to me that I shouldn't feel defensive about that -- every person has a natural amount of communication with others that they need and want, and some need and want less than others. That's okay. But I feel defensive anyway, and catch myself wondering, briefly, whether maybe I'm a freak after all, or, having sternly quelled that thought, wondering whether the other person thinks I'm a bit of a loner because I'm actually boring or have an otherwise horrible character and thus nobody wants to communicate or spend time with me.
It bothers me that, in a day and age when many people broadcast even the most unimportant details about their daily lives via twitter and the like, feeling reluctant to communicate endlessly seems to be slowly becoming a social stigma.
(And no, dears, this is not an attack on all the wonderful people around here who share much of their everyday-lives on their blog. Many of you are just as introverted as myself, I know that. I don't mind all the stuff people share; I only mind being expected, by some, to constantly do the same.)