. : .
"you'll find the shame is like the pain.......
you only feel it once." - Katherine Merrtoi, Dangerous Liasions.
i hate a lot of things now.
i love my job.. sometimes i love nicholaus. i hate feeling sick all day and hating food but i like knowing what's going on inside my body.
so... the lady at the pregnancy crisis center told me that i'm eight weeks along now.. ::sigh::.. so.. this is what's going on inside my uteris..
Your baby's head is quite big, due to the rapid growth of the brain. The upper limbs resemble paddles. Your baby-to-be's heart begins to separate into four chambers, and blood is circulating throughout the body. Intestines form within the umbilical cord, but will later migrate back into the abdominal cavity. In the next few days, foot plates, with the beginnings of toe rays, will appear. The external ears are now present. Your baby is now 10 to 13 millimeters long -- about the size of a cherry. The cells that will become either testes or ovaries arrive, but there is no obvious sign of gender yet. Muscle contractions are beginning, but these early "movements" are not yet perceptible.
the other day i slept for twenty hours with a pair of two hour intervals somewhere in the middle. i can hardly keep my eyes open anymore. i'm having the best sleep i've ever had in my entire life. nick and i are having dinner over at dean and kathy treats house sunday night, they're wonderful.. i think that no matter how many prospective parents i meet.. they'll end up being my final choice.
beav has been e-mailing me just to check up, it's been nice hearing from her, but i'm not expecting a sudden need to forgive her for being such a shit.
i really gotta go to bed now.. i am dead tired. how sad that i still update this fucking thing. everyone knows that i have no friends outside of mollie and nick.. and i tell mollie more than i could ever type here. well.. fuck you all. i probably don't care about you anymore anyway.