just stuff
so what been going on? nada interesante, i'm going through a GIGANTIC rough patch in swimming. tim says i get "too down on myself", but maybe i'm just more intune with me than he is. i know i know, he is the coach he knows way more about this than i would, but ugh. maybe that is my whole goal in life, just to make it so freakin' complicated even I don't want to live it, and it's my life. i'm like one big walking contradiction, i don't understand myself, i'm not following the greek laws! 1) know thyself. i don't really know me, and if i did, sometimes i wonder if i'm really not that great of a person. maybe i'm really some crazy self absorbed creature who should go shut herself up in a cave and die of starvation, then haunt all the stupid kids that are ignorant enough to enter my tomb. ...ok enough of pity lets move on. the meet is this weekend. ok you know what is weird, there are two freshman that are kindof cute...i find them oddly attractive, but not enough to do anything about it. as of the moment boys are just too much trouble, i can't handle one of 'em right now, too much stress. i mean it isn't like i stress enough anyway...ok so how is everyone else?