Part OOC and Partly Part of the journal
Though I didn't really want to write this second half I have found that I am very pleased with it.. And so to continue with trials of Adira in death I have wrote the second half of The Day of the Dead story that I started.
I will say it is very important to know who she is talking to throughout the story..and yes.. bloodraven77 I will write a spoiler if you want... still can't believe a 5 page story needs such things... Oh.. and it is not quite so sad.. not so many tissues required this time...well anyway here it is:
Adira woke in her bed to the sound of bells and the smell of fire. The huge canopy bed about her was as suffocating as the smoke in the room. She closed her eyes to the burning and began to rub them as tears filled her eyes.
“Come we must go.” There was a hand in hers pulling her to her feet. She couldn’t see through the burning tears though it was familiar and comforting. She stumbled and a laugh echoed. “Do I have to carry you every time we get in trouble? I thought you would have out grown of that by now.”
There was no doubt about the voice. “Silvas?” she heard a door open and the fresh air began to clear her eyes as she felt the ground under her feet again. It was indeed Silvas. He stood smiling. She blushed having never seen him in full Centauri regalia or with both eyes. She moved to hug him but he held her away. She was confused.
“You are not mine, nor were you ever to be.” He smiled bitterly. “But I would still give everything for you.” There was an infinitely sad tone to his words. “Now go.” He pointed down the stairs and she again found herself looking on the burning capitol from the palace stairs. “They are waiting for you.” He sighed. “And there are those waiting for me.” He gave her a kiss on the cheek. “Good-bye, my Little One.” She watched him leave or perhaps fade into nothing it was hard to say exactly which was happening.
She looked down the stairs and felt a cold and frightening feeling emanating from the garden. She looked back to the last place she had seen Silvas and she missed him for the first time in a long time. Things rushed back to her, his laugh, his kiss, the sound of is breathing and she knew now that she would never hear it again. That moment was the last time she would ever see him. Adira wanted nothing more then to sit down and cry, fade away to nothing as she had seen him do.
“Come on, they will not wait all day for my shy little flower.” Her eyes snapped to the sound. The words were barely a memory any longer, lost so far back in her childhood that they had almost vanished. The man hobbled up the stairs with his bright silver cane and gaudy blue dress uniform.
“Father?” she ran to him as she had never been able to do as a child.
He grinned taking her in his arms. “I see my flower did indeed blossom into the most beautiful bloom in the garden.” She had forgotten the strength in his embrace and squeaked as she had when she was a child. He laughed heartily. “I see I have still to learn how hard I can hug you without crushing that bloom.” He took her arm and led her down the stairs. “There is much to see in the imperial gardens. Much beauty and even deeper shadows lie within its walls.”
“You my flower must show me how courageous you can be. I must leave you out here alone as your mother is waiting” She looked at him queerly. They were the same words he had said when he led her onto the stage the first time at the conservancy. She was about to argue but he was already gone. Her brow furrowed in confusion and fear as she looked to the entrance of the garden.
“Be strong.” She encouraged herself as she moved down the path. It was dark and the shadows appeared to move; like being in the dark as a child when the shapes seem to be coming for you.
“What do you want?” The voice echoed arrogantly from beside her. She turned and found herself face to face with a swarthy human, his smile so kind that it could only mean evil. She had never seen him before but she somehow knew him. “Ah, the Lady Adira. They have truly understated your beauty.” He took her hand and kissed it and suddenly she felt disgusting, dirty, used. She stepped back from him and he spoke again. “What do you want?”
She didn’t know what to say and her brow furrowed. She didn’t want to answer, there was a feeling that any answer would lead to trouble and so she said nothing. “What do you want?” His voice was so thunderous that she jumped and she could feel it vibrate through her chest like music played too loud. He stared at her with a piercing gaze that she could feel boring directly into her hearts and soul.
She fled from fear but as she turned he was before her still. “What do you want?” The words were sweet and persuasive. She stopped and sighed in frustration and fear.
“I want… I want you to go away and stop staring at me.” She didn’t want to say anything but at least that would get rid of the coldness she felt from him.
“That is not an answer. What do you want?” His voice was full of anger and the darkness and shadows began to close around her. She bit her lip in terror and indecision. He began his piercing stare again and she bristled.
“The dead can’t “want” anything and so there is no answer to your question.” Her defiance had come back to her in a full rush and she pushed herself to bring out her full presence.
He tilted his head in curiosity and then smiled, that kind, too happy smile, that was like slime. “Alright, then what would you have wanted?” His eyes and voice were full of curiosity and concern.
She thought briefly and then turned on him with the full magnitude of her insolence. “I would have wanted to be with the man I loved, to be his wife and to be those things without disgrace to anyone. To be at his side no matter the ends that it took me to.”
His brow raised almost in surprise. “That is a very odd request. Are you sure?” She didn’t want to continue the conversation and so she nodded. “As you wish.” He bowed and stepped backward disappearing into the shadows.
She turned to continue down the path and heard another voice. She hurried toward it because it was familiar and somehow soothing. The path opened to a courtyard and she looked upon the man within sitting on a garden chair and reading from a hand written manuscript. He looked up at the sound of her footsteps.
He smiled and motioned for her to join him on a second chair that she swore was not there before. She shook her head to push away the confusion and took a seat across from him. He closed his book and laughed. “You know I still do not believe he did not drug you that night.”
She smiled and then laughed. “We are not having this conversation again.” She shook her head as he put the book down on the ground and crossed his legs putting one hand on his leg he began to gesture with the other. “So tell me why do you love that most intolerable man as you do? A woman of your beauty could surely do better.”
She sighed. “We have had this conversation before as well.”
He grinned. “Yes, but we have never finished and you have never given me an answer.” He shook his head and a laugh escaped. “I can’t imagine how anyone could love him.”
She sighed rolling her eyes. “Do you know what it is to be a slave?”
“Yes, of course your people were very thorough in teaching that to my people.” He nodded.
“Then you already know part of the answer.” She gazed into his eyes.
“I knew that. He freed you from slavery but that is not a reason to give your hearts to him.” His voice wasn’t argumentative more concerned.
Adira sighed and looked at the stones of the courtyard momentarily deep in thought. He studied her closely and smiled wryly. Finally she returned her gaze to the man sitting across from her. “I love him because I can do nothing else.” She sighed unable to put it into clearer words.
Her companion shook his head. “But why? Why is there no other way?”
She furrowed her brow trying to grasp the answer she could feel but had not the words for. “I…” She fell silent again. “I do because I trust him, respect him, I believe in him. Because of his devotion and his passion and his intelligence.” It wasn’t exactly what she felt but it was the closest her mind could come to expressing her hearts.
He raised his brow curiously. “And nothing about his titles. That is a very odd answer for a Centauri, isn’t it?”
That statement always made her angry she had heard it from Lord Tyree, Mariel, her friends and even from Londo in a not so direct way. Adira turned her gaze to him ferociously but said nothing.
He raised his hands in a calming and surrendering gesture. “Alright, then at least tell me why those other things matter?”
She again paused but only momentarily. “They make him an honorable man and because I am a romantic.” She grinned.
“That you are.” He stood abruptly and took her hand leading her across the cobblestones. “They say a romantic is foolish because they love too deeply and never lose hope. But is that not also what makes true honor?” He dropped her hand and smiled. “He is through there.” Sighing, he pointing down a second path and looked into her eyes. “I protected him for a time and I too came to see the honor that he holds within. You and I…” he pointed to both of them “are rare among his acquaintances.” Her brow furrowed unable to follow his line of thought. He grinned and leaned closer. “We had the courage to forgive him.”
She was shocked but had no time to respond before she felt cold rush down the path to her. The air was so cold it burned but she stepped in anyway. It was dark within and cold, bitterly cold. She stumbled on the uneven surface and because of the numbness spreading from her feet into her legs. Before her appeared a bright red light and she squinted to bear its brightness.
As her eyes adjusted she was again confronted by the image that had torn her hearts asunder. The crumpled form on the ground dressed in imperial white. She dashed, stumbling to his side and fell to the ground but as she rolled him to his back her brows furrowed in confusion. He was drunk, the smell of brivari so pungent that it made her choke. “Londo?” She shook him frantically. He had never been this drunk.
“He is ours now?” The voice sent waves of shivers through Adira and yet she wasn’t even quite sure if she had heard it or if it was part of her mind. She was too afraid to look where she had thought it had come from. She reached for Londo’s shoulder again to attempt to wake him and she saw it. She gasped in shock, covering her mouth with her hand. She stumbled backwards staring at the single eye in horror.
A laugh came from that same unknown that she had refused to look at. “It is part of him, now, he lives if it lives and he dies if it dies. You could say it is the Keeper of his life.” The voice was monotone and growled in a way. She stood and turned. The creature before her was almost as terrifying as the sight of the eye. She glanced at Londo’s catatonic form and anger began to surge through her.
The creature smiled its tiny jagged mouth turning up at the ends. “There is nothing you can do.”
She was defiant and seething. “There is always something that can be done.”
The creature looked at her inquisitively, “What are you willing to do?” the tone remained flat.
“Anything.” It slipped out angrily before she could think.
It grinned. “Would you trade places with him?” She gave Londo a concerned look and without turning away nodded.
She didn’t see the creature nod but her eyes widened as she watched the tentacles of the eye unwrap from Londo’s shoulder. The spider like creature scurried toward her and she looked to the other figure. “Is he alive and unharmed?” The creature nodded and Adira looked back to the spider which was tentatively standing before her. She watched it coil its tentacles about her leg and shimmy up. It tickled and she would have jumped but she was too petrified to do anything but stare. Adira felt the tentacles on her bare shoulders and clenched her fists. She looked once more to Londo before she felt the stabbing pain in her neck and dropped unconscious to the floor.
Adira bolted up in bed screaming. She glanced around feeling the terror that something might indeed be hiding beneath her bed.
“My flower you must hurry. We are to leave in an hour.” She jumped at the sound of his voice and she looked to him for comfort. He smiled laying his cane on the bed he sat. Wiping the tears from her cheek he spoke. “The nightmares again?” She nodded and he smiled reassuringly. “They will pass with time.” Then he laughed whispering. “But your mother, if we are late for your performance, we will never hear the end of that nightmare. Come, get dressed.” He turned and shuffled from the room. She listened momentarily to the sound of the cane on the wooden stairs before dashing out of bed to dress.
The entire court had been invited to the festival and she was nervous but also excited as she walked up the stairs to the opera hall with her father. They were rushed as she had only minutes before her performance was to begin. She sighed at least there was no time to get anxious waiting backstage. Adira regained her confidence as she saw the three women waiting backstage despite the annoyed expression of her mother. Deljah pushed at them. “Go, you two are already a few minutes late as it is, maybe no one will notice.” He voice was filled with anxiety.
Her father led her out on to the stage and she shook nervously as she looked out on the crowd. Every seat in the opera hall was full. She gave her father a troubled glance. He smiled wide and whispered. “You my flower must show me how courageous you can be. I must leave you out here alone as your mother is waiting” The fear was starting to build in her as she saw all of the eyes looking at her. He father leaned close as she was introduced. “When I sing I pick someone in the crowd and pretend I am singing to them and ignore everyone else.” He smiled. “I assure you it will help. Just try not to stare at them.”
Her father gave her a kiss on the cheek and left the stage she was alone. She looked to the lower balconies planning to implement her father’s advice when she saw him or at least his eyes anyway. He smiled pleasantly and she started to get lost in his eyes when she realized she had missed her cue. She blushed as the conductor cleared his throat and seamlessly repeated the first bars of the song. She was still staring at him when she started to sing. His eyes went wide as he heard her voice and he smiled. He made her voice feel as if it would falter from her fluttering hearts and she looked away.
As her song came to an end she looked for the man she had seen but his seat was now empty. She walked from the stage saddened, with her recent dreams there was no way to tell if he had actually ever really been there. She sighed as she stepped back stage knowing that both of her parents would be irritated and demand an explanation for the missed cue. She looked to her mother and raised a brow. Deljah was smiling broad and giddy like a child.
“These were left for you.” One of the attendants came from behind with the biggest bouquet of flowers she had ever seen. Adira was speechless as she tried to imagine who had brought them. She looked to her mother for an answer as she ran her fingers through the blooms.
“He is in the foyer with your father. I think you have made quite an impression on him.” Her words were encouraging. Adira turned and glided out into the foyer. Her hearts stopped as her eyes fell upon her father and the Centauri she had seen in the balcony of the opera hall.
I will say it is very important to know who she is talking to throughout the story..and yes.. bloodraven77 I will write a spoiler if you want... still can't believe a 5 page story needs such things... Oh.. and it is not quite so sad.. not so many tissues required this time...well anyway here it is:
Adira woke in her bed to the sound of bells and the smell of fire. The huge canopy bed about her was as suffocating as the smoke in the room. She closed her eyes to the burning and began to rub them as tears filled her eyes.
“Come we must go.” There was a hand in hers pulling her to her feet. She couldn’t see through the burning tears though it was familiar and comforting. She stumbled and a laugh echoed. “Do I have to carry you every time we get in trouble? I thought you would have out grown of that by now.”
There was no doubt about the voice. “Silvas?” she heard a door open and the fresh air began to clear her eyes as she felt the ground under her feet again. It was indeed Silvas. He stood smiling. She blushed having never seen him in full Centauri regalia or with both eyes. She moved to hug him but he held her away. She was confused.
“You are not mine, nor were you ever to be.” He smiled bitterly. “But I would still give everything for you.” There was an infinitely sad tone to his words. “Now go.” He pointed down the stairs and she again found herself looking on the burning capitol from the palace stairs. “They are waiting for you.” He sighed. “And there are those waiting for me.” He gave her a kiss on the cheek. “Good-bye, my Little One.” She watched him leave or perhaps fade into nothing it was hard to say exactly which was happening.
She looked down the stairs and felt a cold and frightening feeling emanating from the garden. She looked back to the last place she had seen Silvas and she missed him for the first time in a long time. Things rushed back to her, his laugh, his kiss, the sound of is breathing and she knew now that she would never hear it again. That moment was the last time she would ever see him. Adira wanted nothing more then to sit down and cry, fade away to nothing as she had seen him do.
“Come on, they will not wait all day for my shy little flower.” Her eyes snapped to the sound. The words were barely a memory any longer, lost so far back in her childhood that they had almost vanished. The man hobbled up the stairs with his bright silver cane and gaudy blue dress uniform.
“Father?” she ran to him as she had never been able to do as a child.
He grinned taking her in his arms. “I see my flower did indeed blossom into the most beautiful bloom in the garden.” She had forgotten the strength in his embrace and squeaked as she had when she was a child. He laughed heartily. “I see I have still to learn how hard I can hug you without crushing that bloom.” He took her arm and led her down the stairs. “There is much to see in the imperial gardens. Much beauty and even deeper shadows lie within its walls.”
“You my flower must show me how courageous you can be. I must leave you out here alone as your mother is waiting” She looked at him queerly. They were the same words he had said when he led her onto the stage the first time at the conservancy. She was about to argue but he was already gone. Her brow furrowed in confusion and fear as she looked to the entrance of the garden.
“Be strong.” She encouraged herself as she moved down the path. It was dark and the shadows appeared to move; like being in the dark as a child when the shapes seem to be coming for you.
“What do you want?” The voice echoed arrogantly from beside her. She turned and found herself face to face with a swarthy human, his smile so kind that it could only mean evil. She had never seen him before but she somehow knew him. “Ah, the Lady Adira. They have truly understated your beauty.” He took her hand and kissed it and suddenly she felt disgusting, dirty, used. She stepped back from him and he spoke again. “What do you want?”
She didn’t know what to say and her brow furrowed. She didn’t want to answer, there was a feeling that any answer would lead to trouble and so she said nothing. “What do you want?” His voice was so thunderous that she jumped and she could feel it vibrate through her chest like music played too loud. He stared at her with a piercing gaze that she could feel boring directly into her hearts and soul.
She fled from fear but as she turned he was before her still. “What do you want?” The words were sweet and persuasive. She stopped and sighed in frustration and fear.
“I want… I want you to go away and stop staring at me.” She didn’t want to say anything but at least that would get rid of the coldness she felt from him.
“That is not an answer. What do you want?” His voice was full of anger and the darkness and shadows began to close around her. She bit her lip in terror and indecision. He began his piercing stare again and she bristled.
“The dead can’t “want” anything and so there is no answer to your question.” Her defiance had come back to her in a full rush and she pushed herself to bring out her full presence.
He tilted his head in curiosity and then smiled, that kind, too happy smile, that was like slime. “Alright, then what would you have wanted?” His eyes and voice were full of curiosity and concern.
She thought briefly and then turned on him with the full magnitude of her insolence. “I would have wanted to be with the man I loved, to be his wife and to be those things without disgrace to anyone. To be at his side no matter the ends that it took me to.”
His brow raised almost in surprise. “That is a very odd request. Are you sure?” She didn’t want to continue the conversation and so she nodded. “As you wish.” He bowed and stepped backward disappearing into the shadows.
She turned to continue down the path and heard another voice. She hurried toward it because it was familiar and somehow soothing. The path opened to a courtyard and she looked upon the man within sitting on a garden chair and reading from a hand written manuscript. He looked up at the sound of her footsteps.
He smiled and motioned for her to join him on a second chair that she swore was not there before. She shook her head to push away the confusion and took a seat across from him. He closed his book and laughed. “You know I still do not believe he did not drug you that night.”
She smiled and then laughed. “We are not having this conversation again.” She shook her head as he put the book down on the ground and crossed his legs putting one hand on his leg he began to gesture with the other. “So tell me why do you love that most intolerable man as you do? A woman of your beauty could surely do better.”
She sighed. “We have had this conversation before as well.”
He grinned. “Yes, but we have never finished and you have never given me an answer.” He shook his head and a laugh escaped. “I can’t imagine how anyone could love him.”
She sighed rolling her eyes. “Do you know what it is to be a slave?”
“Yes, of course your people were very thorough in teaching that to my people.” He nodded.
“Then you already know part of the answer.” She gazed into his eyes.
“I knew that. He freed you from slavery but that is not a reason to give your hearts to him.” His voice wasn’t argumentative more concerned.
Adira sighed and looked at the stones of the courtyard momentarily deep in thought. He studied her closely and smiled wryly. Finally she returned her gaze to the man sitting across from her. “I love him because I can do nothing else.” She sighed unable to put it into clearer words.
Her companion shook his head. “But why? Why is there no other way?”
She furrowed her brow trying to grasp the answer she could feel but had not the words for. “I…” She fell silent again. “I do because I trust him, respect him, I believe in him. Because of his devotion and his passion and his intelligence.” It wasn’t exactly what she felt but it was the closest her mind could come to expressing her hearts.
He raised his brow curiously. “And nothing about his titles. That is a very odd answer for a Centauri, isn’t it?”
That statement always made her angry she had heard it from Lord Tyree, Mariel, her friends and even from Londo in a not so direct way. Adira turned her gaze to him ferociously but said nothing.
He raised his hands in a calming and surrendering gesture. “Alright, then at least tell me why those other things matter?”
She again paused but only momentarily. “They make him an honorable man and because I am a romantic.” She grinned.
“That you are.” He stood abruptly and took her hand leading her across the cobblestones. “They say a romantic is foolish because they love too deeply and never lose hope. But is that not also what makes true honor?” He dropped her hand and smiled. “He is through there.” Sighing, he pointing down a second path and looked into her eyes. “I protected him for a time and I too came to see the honor that he holds within. You and I…” he pointed to both of them “are rare among his acquaintances.” Her brow furrowed unable to follow his line of thought. He grinned and leaned closer. “We had the courage to forgive him.”
She was shocked but had no time to respond before she felt cold rush down the path to her. The air was so cold it burned but she stepped in anyway. It was dark within and cold, bitterly cold. She stumbled on the uneven surface and because of the numbness spreading from her feet into her legs. Before her appeared a bright red light and she squinted to bear its brightness.
As her eyes adjusted she was again confronted by the image that had torn her hearts asunder. The crumpled form on the ground dressed in imperial white. She dashed, stumbling to his side and fell to the ground but as she rolled him to his back her brows furrowed in confusion. He was drunk, the smell of brivari so pungent that it made her choke. “Londo?” She shook him frantically. He had never been this drunk.
“He is ours now?” The voice sent waves of shivers through Adira and yet she wasn’t even quite sure if she had heard it or if it was part of her mind. She was too afraid to look where she had thought it had come from. She reached for Londo’s shoulder again to attempt to wake him and she saw it. She gasped in shock, covering her mouth with her hand. She stumbled backwards staring at the single eye in horror.
A laugh came from that same unknown that she had refused to look at. “It is part of him, now, he lives if it lives and he dies if it dies. You could say it is the Keeper of his life.” The voice was monotone and growled in a way. She stood and turned. The creature before her was almost as terrifying as the sight of the eye. She glanced at Londo’s catatonic form and anger began to surge through her.
The creature smiled its tiny jagged mouth turning up at the ends. “There is nothing you can do.”
She was defiant and seething. “There is always something that can be done.”
The creature looked at her inquisitively, “What are you willing to do?” the tone remained flat.
“Anything.” It slipped out angrily before she could think.
It grinned. “Would you trade places with him?” She gave Londo a concerned look and without turning away nodded.
She didn’t see the creature nod but her eyes widened as she watched the tentacles of the eye unwrap from Londo’s shoulder. The spider like creature scurried toward her and she looked to the other figure. “Is he alive and unharmed?” The creature nodded and Adira looked back to the spider which was tentatively standing before her. She watched it coil its tentacles about her leg and shimmy up. It tickled and she would have jumped but she was too petrified to do anything but stare. Adira felt the tentacles on her bare shoulders and clenched her fists. She looked once more to Londo before she felt the stabbing pain in her neck and dropped unconscious to the floor.
Adira bolted up in bed screaming. She glanced around feeling the terror that something might indeed be hiding beneath her bed.
“My flower you must hurry. We are to leave in an hour.” She jumped at the sound of his voice and she looked to him for comfort. He smiled laying his cane on the bed he sat. Wiping the tears from her cheek he spoke. “The nightmares again?” She nodded and he smiled reassuringly. “They will pass with time.” Then he laughed whispering. “But your mother, if we are late for your performance, we will never hear the end of that nightmare. Come, get dressed.” He turned and shuffled from the room. She listened momentarily to the sound of the cane on the wooden stairs before dashing out of bed to dress.
The entire court had been invited to the festival and she was nervous but also excited as she walked up the stairs to the opera hall with her father. They were rushed as she had only minutes before her performance was to begin. She sighed at least there was no time to get anxious waiting backstage. Adira regained her confidence as she saw the three women waiting backstage despite the annoyed expression of her mother. Deljah pushed at them. “Go, you two are already a few minutes late as it is, maybe no one will notice.” He voice was filled with anxiety.
Her father led her out on to the stage and she shook nervously as she looked out on the crowd. Every seat in the opera hall was full. She gave her father a troubled glance. He smiled wide and whispered. “You my flower must show me how courageous you can be. I must leave you out here alone as your mother is waiting” The fear was starting to build in her as she saw all of the eyes looking at her. He father leaned close as she was introduced. “When I sing I pick someone in the crowd and pretend I am singing to them and ignore everyone else.” He smiled. “I assure you it will help. Just try not to stare at them.”
Her father gave her a kiss on the cheek and left the stage she was alone. She looked to the lower balconies planning to implement her father’s advice when she saw him or at least his eyes anyway. He smiled pleasantly and she started to get lost in his eyes when she realized she had missed her cue. She blushed as the conductor cleared his throat and seamlessly repeated the first bars of the song. She was still staring at him when she started to sing. His eyes went wide as he heard her voice and he smiled. He made her voice feel as if it would falter from her fluttering hearts and she looked away.
As her song came to an end she looked for the man she had seen but his seat was now empty. She walked from the stage saddened, with her recent dreams there was no way to tell if he had actually ever really been there. She sighed as she stepped back stage knowing that both of her parents would be irritated and demand an explanation for the missed cue. She looked to her mother and raised a brow. Deljah was smiling broad and giddy like a child.
“These were left for you.” One of the attendants came from behind with the biggest bouquet of flowers she had ever seen. Adira was speechless as she tried to imagine who had brought them. She looked to her mother for an answer as she ran her fingers through the blooms.
“He is in the foyer with your father. I think you have made quite an impression on him.” Her words were encouraging. Adira turned and glided out into the foyer. Her hearts stopped as her eyes fell upon her father and the Centauri she had seen in the balcony of the opera hall.