Fic: The kiss-giving hypothesis (6/?)
Title: The Kiss-giving Hypothesis; chapter 6
Author: adenosinatri
Betas: psycholizard, mist72, southern_heaven.
Rating: PG-13
Word Count: 1583
Fandom: The Big Bang Theory
Pairings/Characters: Penny/Sheldon, with featuring appearences from the others
Summary: Sheldon wonders how kissing Penny would be.
Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original plot is the property of the author. No money is being made from this work. No copyright infringement is intended.
AN : A longer chapter for you guys! I hope you enjoy this, because other updates on this story may take a longer while to come since I'm currently working on a lot of other stories and stuff. Any grammatical glitches, or such, leftovers are totally my fault, do call out on them. Also, am I the only one unable to login at fanfiction.net?
As it turns out, I was right about an upcoming inquisition from Wolowitz. No surprises there. However, the whole thing had me extremely uncomfortable. The next day at work he entered my office abruptly and essentially harassed me until I explained “what was going on.”
Of course, I had no choice but to reveal the whole truth; I cannot lie. Not convincingly, and certainly not without preparation. When I finished he just stared back at me, his mouth agape and eyes bugged, which I’d guess is a common expression of disbelief.
“Hold up,” he finally said, waving his palms at me. “You. And PENNY. You MADE OUT with PENNY? YOU?”
He practically spat out the words.
“Excuse me, but I do not appreciate your tone.”
“Oh, really? This is…This is unbelievable. Tell me this didn’t really happen.”
I frowned. “Okay, this didn’t really happen.” He was shaking his head repeatedly, eyes still wide. Why did everyone have to keep behaving in such confusing, illogical and not to mention inappropriate manners?
“What exactly is the purpose of my saying these words? Just for future reference.”
“Nothing. Forget it. I just…” He paused. Then he had the look on his face. The look of great ideas. Most people would say, as if a light bulb had appeared over his head, suddenly enlightening his mind with amazing discoveries. Which is, of course, ridiculous. No one would even think of light bulbs when they had a great idea, let alone actually have one appear on their heads. Well, I suppose Thomas Edison probably did think of light bulbs when he had his great idea. But it’s a valid comic device, I granted. So Wolowitz looked back at me a dazed expression stamped on his face.
“Wait a second, wait a second. Yes. I can turn this around on my favor!” He ran up to me and grabbing a hold of my shoulders, desperately shook me.
“Sheldon. You have to tell me every little detail. Every single thing you did to get this to happen, and most importantly, everything that she did to you during the…well. Go ahead.”
I looked at him with despise and pulled my self away from his sweaty grasp.
“I most certainly will not. Whatever has passed between Penny and I is a private matter and I would very much like if you did not discuss this any further and that it was kept it within the confines of this office.”
“Oh, no way. If you’re not telling me, I’m telling on you.” I gulped dryly.
“But… You can’t. Leonard. He must never find out about this. He could very well kill me, for all I know. He’s certainly shown this inclination before.” I pleaded. A malicious grin appeared on his face.
“Well, well, looks like Dr. Sheldon Cooper wants Mr. Wolowitz to keep a secret, doesn’t he? Well in that case…” He wrapped his arm around my shoulders and led me to sit on my chair, “…He’s going to tell everything in order to buy Mr. Wolowitz’s silence, won’t he now?”
“Are you blackmailing me?”
“Oh, yeah.”
I gulped again. This could become difficult to handle.
I was forced to ‘spill my guts’ to Wolowitz, so to speak. Though, I’m inclined to believe it could very well had been literal, especially since I felt highly nauseated over the course of our conversation. When I was finished giving him what he deemed sufficient information (I tried my best not to reveal anything that could embarrass Penny, I felt sufficient embarrassment for the two of us), he smiled wider and moved to leave the room.
“What’s going on, Howard? Sheldon?” Luckily it was only Rajesh, showing up at the threshold. I would have not been able to recover had it been Leonard. Wolowitz, who now had grown a permanent grin on his face, stared back at him.
“Well, you wouldn’t believe it, my friend. Remember what we witnessed the previous afternoon?”
And so my day proceeded, with annoying remarks, and sideway glances and insinuations, all coming from two men I assumed where my friends. But even I know that’s not very friendly behavior. Not to mention unpleasant. Especially since I was still trying to keep it a secret from Leonard, who, due to the others’ attempts at making me feel awkward, was now beginning to get suspicious. Gladly, due to my absolute lack of romantic history he just passed it off as regular teasing on their part.
Teasing which got to a point where I thought it would never stop.
Some were highly stupid such as texting me, asking for further details on the colors of her undergarments. Others were surprisingly convoluted, involving fake notes from “Penny” and lingerie hidden in my desk drawers, along with a Teddy Bear with flowers delivered by an enthusiastic man, rambling about my “hot blonde girlfriend”. Incidentally, it appeared at the exact moment of my meeting with Dr, Gablehauser.
I’d had about enough by the end of the day, and much to my delight, the practical jokes did not follow me home, where Leonard and I were planning on eating our recently bought Chinese food. Penny, however, appeared to have different plans, for me at least. She was suspiciously standing on the hallway, closer to our door than to hers. I observed as Leonard frowned and asked her what she wanted. When she revealed her intention to speak to me, I felt the blood rush down from my face and gulped. Leonard glanced back at me and I noted he didn’t seem very pleased by that turn of events. But, oddly enough, he smiled at Penny and went inside with our food, shutting the door on his way. Penny faced me and reluctantly, I did the same. She smiled slightly.
“So, I guess it’s time to talk, huh?” she said.
“What matter do you wish to discuss?”
“Well, what do you think?”
I sighed. “Reasonably speaking there’s only one prominent subject at the present moment. However, I do not see how the conversation could progress to a further level than what it is at currently. That being said, I’m hungry and I’d like to go eat my Chinese food.”
I regretted my words as soon as I’ve finished them, for Penny’s face twisted into an expression of pure fury.
“So that’s it? Gosh, I bet you didn’t even think about this at all today, did you?”
“Well, it was hard not to with Wolowitz and Koothrappali teasing me about it the entire morning and afternoon.”
“And you told them? You know what? Forget it! I thought that maybe it had meant something for you too, but CLEARLY I was wrong! See you later, Sheldon.”
And she stormed off into her apartment. The hollow sound of the door slamming prompted me to jump.
This wasn’t right. I realized I had crossed some sort of line by ignoring Penny’s desire to proceed in conversation. I turned back to knock on her door.
“Penny. Penny. Penny.”
Silence. I tried again.
“Penny. Penny. Penny.”
Nothing. I sighed.
“Penny, if I by any chance expressed anything that disturbed you, I’d like to offer my apologies. I would prefer, however, if I did not have to do so to the door.”
After a minute, which I first imagined to have been five - disproved by a quick glance at my watch - she had opened the door and was glaring at me again, her mouth hanging open. She shook her head a few times and finally spoke.
“So you do want to talk things over?”
“I assume that would be best. Yes.”
“Okay. Talk.”
“I beg your pardon?”
“You want to talk, do it. I’ve talked enough.”
“I…I…I’m not sure what to say.”
“Figures.”
She motioned to close the door, but I stirred my hand forward to hold the door handle in place.
“Must you be so difficult?”
“Oh, now I’m the one being difficult?”
“I was never difficult. I offered you plenty of easier options and explanations; you merely choose to refute science over romance.”
“What can I say? I must be a fool.”
“I do not think you’re a fool. I do, however, believe you may be forming delusional thoughts regarding my person.”
“Such as…”
“Well, for one thing, that I would easily succumb to romantic situations.”
“You succumbed to kissing me. Twice.”
“I…don’t know what came over me.”
She smiled mischievously and nodded.
“Come on, admit it. You like me.”
“I do not.”
“Do too.”
“Do no…Penny. I will not partake in childish games with you.”
She chuckled. “Fine, sweetie.” And, as if concluding that thought, she climbed on her toes and placed a chaste kiss on the tip of my lips. I lifted my hands up to hold her face in place before she could pull back. An action which I cannot explain using reason. I can, however, say it was the action that brought us the greatest of all troubles, for that was the moment Leonard chose to open our apartment door to seek me out. As I held Penny, I heard the door open, and before I could react, I heard him say with a yelp.
“Guys? Sheldon? What…What…What’s happening?”
I dropped Penny with force and turned to face him. The contorted mix of anger and hurt in his face caused pain in my stomach. The repercussions of this event were beyond my imagination, but I could tell by the fury in his eyes that it couldn’t possibly end well.
Author: adenosinatri
Betas: psycholizard, mist72, southern_heaven.
Rating: PG-13
Word Count: 1583
Fandom: The Big Bang Theory
Pairings/Characters: Penny/Sheldon, with featuring appearences from the others
Summary: Sheldon wonders how kissing Penny would be.
Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original plot is the property of the author. No money is being made from this work. No copyright infringement is intended.
AN : A longer chapter for you guys! I hope you enjoy this, because other updates on this story may take a longer while to come since I'm currently working on a lot of other stories and stuff. Any grammatical glitches, or such, leftovers are totally my fault, do call out on them. Also, am I the only one unable to login at fanfiction.net?
As it turns out, I was right about an upcoming inquisition from Wolowitz. No surprises there. However, the whole thing had me extremely uncomfortable. The next day at work he entered my office abruptly and essentially harassed me until I explained “what was going on.”
Of course, I had no choice but to reveal the whole truth; I cannot lie. Not convincingly, and certainly not without preparation. When I finished he just stared back at me, his mouth agape and eyes bugged, which I’d guess is a common expression of disbelief.
“Hold up,” he finally said, waving his palms at me. “You. And PENNY. You MADE OUT with PENNY? YOU?”
He practically spat out the words.
“Excuse me, but I do not appreciate your tone.”
“Oh, really? This is…This is unbelievable. Tell me this didn’t really happen.”
I frowned. “Okay, this didn’t really happen.” He was shaking his head repeatedly, eyes still wide. Why did everyone have to keep behaving in such confusing, illogical and not to mention inappropriate manners?
“What exactly is the purpose of my saying these words? Just for future reference.”
“Nothing. Forget it. I just…” He paused. Then he had the look on his face. The look of great ideas. Most people would say, as if a light bulb had appeared over his head, suddenly enlightening his mind with amazing discoveries. Which is, of course, ridiculous. No one would even think of light bulbs when they had a great idea, let alone actually have one appear on their heads. Well, I suppose Thomas Edison probably did think of light bulbs when he had his great idea. But it’s a valid comic device, I granted. So Wolowitz looked back at me a dazed expression stamped on his face.
“Wait a second, wait a second. Yes. I can turn this around on my favor!” He ran up to me and grabbing a hold of my shoulders, desperately shook me.
“Sheldon. You have to tell me every little detail. Every single thing you did to get this to happen, and most importantly, everything that she did to you during the…well. Go ahead.”
I looked at him with despise and pulled my self away from his sweaty grasp.
“I most certainly will not. Whatever has passed between Penny and I is a private matter and I would very much like if you did not discuss this any further and that it was kept it within the confines of this office.”
“Oh, no way. If you’re not telling me, I’m telling on you.” I gulped dryly.
“But… You can’t. Leonard. He must never find out about this. He could very well kill me, for all I know. He’s certainly shown this inclination before.” I pleaded. A malicious grin appeared on his face.
“Well, well, looks like Dr. Sheldon Cooper wants Mr. Wolowitz to keep a secret, doesn’t he? Well in that case…” He wrapped his arm around my shoulders and led me to sit on my chair, “…He’s going to tell everything in order to buy Mr. Wolowitz’s silence, won’t he now?”
“Are you blackmailing me?”
“Oh, yeah.”
I gulped again. This could become difficult to handle.
I was forced to ‘spill my guts’ to Wolowitz, so to speak. Though, I’m inclined to believe it could very well had been literal, especially since I felt highly nauseated over the course of our conversation. When I was finished giving him what he deemed sufficient information (I tried my best not to reveal anything that could embarrass Penny, I felt sufficient embarrassment for the two of us), he smiled wider and moved to leave the room.
“What’s going on, Howard? Sheldon?” Luckily it was only Rajesh, showing up at the threshold. I would have not been able to recover had it been Leonard. Wolowitz, who now had grown a permanent grin on his face, stared back at him.
“Well, you wouldn’t believe it, my friend. Remember what we witnessed the previous afternoon?”
And so my day proceeded, with annoying remarks, and sideway glances and insinuations, all coming from two men I assumed where my friends. But even I know that’s not very friendly behavior. Not to mention unpleasant. Especially since I was still trying to keep it a secret from Leonard, who, due to the others’ attempts at making me feel awkward, was now beginning to get suspicious. Gladly, due to my absolute lack of romantic history he just passed it off as regular teasing on their part.
Teasing which got to a point where I thought it would never stop.
Some were highly stupid such as texting me, asking for further details on the colors of her undergarments. Others were surprisingly convoluted, involving fake notes from “Penny” and lingerie hidden in my desk drawers, along with a Teddy Bear with flowers delivered by an enthusiastic man, rambling about my “hot blonde girlfriend”. Incidentally, it appeared at the exact moment of my meeting with Dr, Gablehauser.
I’d had about enough by the end of the day, and much to my delight, the practical jokes did not follow me home, where Leonard and I were planning on eating our recently bought Chinese food. Penny, however, appeared to have different plans, for me at least. She was suspiciously standing on the hallway, closer to our door than to hers. I observed as Leonard frowned and asked her what she wanted. When she revealed her intention to speak to me, I felt the blood rush down from my face and gulped. Leonard glanced back at me and I noted he didn’t seem very pleased by that turn of events. But, oddly enough, he smiled at Penny and went inside with our food, shutting the door on his way. Penny faced me and reluctantly, I did the same. She smiled slightly.
“So, I guess it’s time to talk, huh?” she said.
“What matter do you wish to discuss?”
“Well, what do you think?”
I sighed. “Reasonably speaking there’s only one prominent subject at the present moment. However, I do not see how the conversation could progress to a further level than what it is at currently. That being said, I’m hungry and I’d like to go eat my Chinese food.”
I regretted my words as soon as I’ve finished them, for Penny’s face twisted into an expression of pure fury.
“So that’s it? Gosh, I bet you didn’t even think about this at all today, did you?”
“Well, it was hard not to with Wolowitz and Koothrappali teasing me about it the entire morning and afternoon.”
“And you told them? You know what? Forget it! I thought that maybe it had meant something for you too, but CLEARLY I was wrong! See you later, Sheldon.”
And she stormed off into her apartment. The hollow sound of the door slamming prompted me to jump.
This wasn’t right. I realized I had crossed some sort of line by ignoring Penny’s desire to proceed in conversation. I turned back to knock on her door.
“Penny. Penny. Penny.”
Silence. I tried again.
“Penny. Penny. Penny.”
Nothing. I sighed.
“Penny, if I by any chance expressed anything that disturbed you, I’d like to offer my apologies. I would prefer, however, if I did not have to do so to the door.”
After a minute, which I first imagined to have been five - disproved by a quick glance at my watch - she had opened the door and was glaring at me again, her mouth hanging open. She shook her head a few times and finally spoke.
“So you do want to talk things over?”
“I assume that would be best. Yes.”
“Okay. Talk.”
“I beg your pardon?”
“You want to talk, do it. I’ve talked enough.”
“I…I…I’m not sure what to say.”
“Figures.”
She motioned to close the door, but I stirred my hand forward to hold the door handle in place.
“Must you be so difficult?”
“Oh, now I’m the one being difficult?”
“I was never difficult. I offered you plenty of easier options and explanations; you merely choose to refute science over romance.”
“What can I say? I must be a fool.”
“I do not think you’re a fool. I do, however, believe you may be forming delusional thoughts regarding my person.”
“Such as…”
“Well, for one thing, that I would easily succumb to romantic situations.”
“You succumbed to kissing me. Twice.”
“I…don’t know what came over me.”
She smiled mischievously and nodded.
“Come on, admit it. You like me.”
“I do not.”
“Do too.”
“Do no…Penny. I will not partake in childish games with you.”
She chuckled. “Fine, sweetie.” And, as if concluding that thought, she climbed on her toes and placed a chaste kiss on the tip of my lips. I lifted my hands up to hold her face in place before she could pull back. An action which I cannot explain using reason. I can, however, say it was the action that brought us the greatest of all troubles, for that was the moment Leonard chose to open our apartment door to seek me out. As I held Penny, I heard the door open, and before I could react, I heard him say with a yelp.
“Guys? Sheldon? What…What…What’s happening?”
I dropped Penny with force and turned to face him. The contorted mix of anger and hurt in his face caused pain in my stomach. The repercussions of this event were beyond my imagination, but I could tell by the fury in his eyes that it couldn’t possibly end well.