"Dear Live Journal" #5
Fuck work. And fuck responsibility. And fuck being adult.
I want to have my return to Neverland. I really want to come back to childhood. I desperately want this. I want to go back to that time when everything was simple. When I didn't have to decide anything by myself. I want to go back to that time when my parents decided what time I have to get up, what I should eat and wear, what I'm supposed to do for the rest of the day. And all this is because I suck at making decisions. And because whatever you decide is written on your ass. I don't want to take full responsibility about my decisions. Frankly, who really wants that. I don't want to feel guilty when something goes wrong. Which usually does. Fuck that.
Now I'm suffering from the consequences of my last decision. Surprise, ha. I only hope that everything will work for the best. Cause I can't live with the pressure. It's annoying. And it's bugging me. And it's affecting my sleeping habits. And I can't get it out of my head. I don't think about anything else all week. And I really want this to stop but I can't pressure myself to stop it. Fuck, me and pressure don't work well together.
I want to have my return to Neverland. I really want to come back to childhood. I desperately want this. I want to go back to that time when everything was simple. When I didn't have to decide anything by myself. I want to go back to that time when my parents decided what time I have to get up, what I should eat and wear, what I'm supposed to do for the rest of the day. And all this is because I suck at making decisions. And because whatever you decide is written on your ass. I don't want to take full responsibility about my decisions. Frankly, who really wants that. I don't want to feel guilty when something goes wrong. Which usually does. Fuck that.
Now I'm suffering from the consequences of my last decision. Surprise, ha. I only hope that everything will work for the best. Cause I can't live with the pressure. It's annoying. And it's bugging me. And it's affecting my sleeping habits. And I can't get it out of my head. I don't think about anything else all week. And I really want this to stop but I can't pressure myself to stop it. Fuck, me and pressure don't work well together.