Exposure Settings
How much do I expose my "true" self to others online?
At what point do I expose who I am, if i do at all, and how much do I expose of myself?
How do I decide who I want to invite inside the sorted inner workings of Addi?
Being the sometimes reflective person that I am I think about the above questions when I share personal things online, consciously and unconsciously. When I am physically near another person on a daily basis it's much harder to hide things about myself. Sooner or later that person will see the good, bad, and ugly in Addi. Despite my efforts all the selfish, callous, and personal physical and character flaws that comprise the whole of me eventually come to the surface.
However the dynamics of online relationships offer me much more control in this matter. I can choose what picture I want to put up. The horrifying photo of me unshaven, with wild hair, and a head cold can stay safely locked up in my computer files. The immature and petty emotional outburst I had the other day can remain hidden to others. I am free to present myself as charming, semi-intelligent, sensitive, and witty to those I communicate with.
The obvious drawback with this "power" is that it's only a part of who I really am. It's like looking at the tip of an iceberg, and not knowing that 70% of it remains hidden from view.
Don't get me wrong. I'm not suggesting that it's a positive thing to share all of who I am with everyone I meet:
LJ Friend: What's up, Addi?
Me: I have some weird rash on my foot today. One of my co-workers looks and smells like a pig, I enjoy stepping on cockroaches, and at the moment I have a boner thinking about your gorgeous tits.
LJ Friend: I see...well, I need to go now.
Some things are best kept to oneself.
Every person is unique. Every "relationship" I develop online is also unique. Determining what I share and when I share things of a personal nature varies with each relationship. There are so many factors involved. What I am aware of though is that I wrestle with questions like, "Should I share this now about myself, or wait?"; "Do I really care what this person thinks about me?"; or "What if I share this and they think less of me?"
So to those of you reading this that think you know Addi I offer this note of cautious reality: Whether I choose to share it with you or not, there is an angelic side and a dark side that make up who I am; an open book for the world to see side, and a purposely closed enigmatic side to my personality.
For what it's worth I have to live with myself 24/7, and I'm still trying to figure out who Addi is.
At what point do I expose who I am, if i do at all, and how much do I expose of myself?
How do I decide who I want to invite inside the sorted inner workings of Addi?
Being the sometimes reflective person that I am I think about the above questions when I share personal things online, consciously and unconsciously. When I am physically near another person on a daily basis it's much harder to hide things about myself. Sooner or later that person will see the good, bad, and ugly in Addi. Despite my efforts all the selfish, callous, and personal physical and character flaws that comprise the whole of me eventually come to the surface.
However the dynamics of online relationships offer me much more control in this matter. I can choose what picture I want to put up. The horrifying photo of me unshaven, with wild hair, and a head cold can stay safely locked up in my computer files. The immature and petty emotional outburst I had the other day can remain hidden to others. I am free to present myself as charming, semi-intelligent, sensitive, and witty to those I communicate with.
The obvious drawback with this "power" is that it's only a part of who I really am. It's like looking at the tip of an iceberg, and not knowing that 70% of it remains hidden from view.
Don't get me wrong. I'm not suggesting that it's a positive thing to share all of who I am with everyone I meet:
LJ Friend: What's up, Addi?
Me: I have some weird rash on my foot today. One of my co-workers looks and smells like a pig, I enjoy stepping on cockroaches, and at the moment I have a boner thinking about your gorgeous tits.
LJ Friend: I see...well, I need to go now.
Some things are best kept to oneself.
Every person is unique. Every "relationship" I develop online is also unique. Determining what I share and when I share things of a personal nature varies with each relationship. There are so many factors involved. What I am aware of though is that I wrestle with questions like, "Should I share this now about myself, or wait?"; "Do I really care what this person thinks about me?"; or "What if I share this and they think less of me?"
So to those of you reading this that think you know Addi I offer this note of cautious reality: Whether I choose to share it with you or not, there is an angelic side and a dark side that make up who I am; an open book for the world to see side, and a purposely closed enigmatic side to my personality.
For what it's worth I have to live with myself 24/7, and I'm still trying to figure out who Addi is.