Fic: Nothing Ventured (Logan/Veronica) PG-13
Title: Nothing Ventured
Author: addictedtojoy
Pairing/Character: Logan/Veronica
Word Count: 913
Rating: PG-13
Summary: They don't write handbooks for this.
Spoilers/Warnings: everything up to and including the season finale (and hopes for September)
A/N: Unbetaed, so please forgive my spelling errors. Because of the weird computer situation at home (oh, for the internet of residence!) I am posting this without running it by my beta first. Long story, short, please be kind and try to see past any glaring errors you might find. This may become part of a longer work, or maybe not. I haven't decided yet, and I guess any/all feedback I receive may help me make that decision. So, if you have an opinion either way, let me know.
She's pretty sure that this is the way it's supposed to be, but sometimes it's hard to tell. Complete silence from the one she most wants to talk to, and too many words from those she really doesn't. They don't write handbooks for this, nothing titled "How to fix things between you and your ex-boyfriend, who is also the ex-boyfriend of your dead best friend and whose father you helped put in jail two months ago." Even Jerry Springer never had material this good.
The summer passes in a sun-drenched haze. Cases, beach with Wallace, the usual pretense of living that she has grown accustomed to over the last year and a half. Almost two years now, and isn't it funny how you can go on living without ever actually taking a breath?
She has been non-breathing for a while now.
When September comes, she has a hard time imagining what school will be like. She hasn't been back since the night Aaron tried to burn her alive. Maybe an attempt on your life and a severely-burned father got you a get-out-of-jail-free card these days. Then again, this is Neptune. That kind of shit was practically routine. She is kind of surprised they let her get out of the last few weeks of school so easily.
So, senior year now, and Neptune High is once again foreign ground. Everything was easy with Lilly there, and then nearly intolerable without her. Then, for a while, it was actually okay, with Logan and Wallace and Weevil. But now... well, now hardly bears thinking about. She finds herself continually running her fingers over her pockets, then chastizing herself for wanting to pull out her cell phone every time and check if he'd called.
He'd never called.
Really, she knows she shouldn't be surprised. Would she have called, if their situations had been reversed? After all, wasn't she the one who told Meg she'd didn't forgive the people who'd hurt her? And even though she'd made an exception for him, that night at the disastrous surprise un-birthday party (before she'd found the cameras) she didn't really expect him to do the same for her. Her forgiveness had lasted so short a time, too, that maybe he hadn't noticed.
...
The first morning, first day (how cruel could the universe get?) she sees him in the hallway. In fact, they share a homeroom, and isn't that poetic. He doesn't meet her eyes, and she knows that he hates her. Even though she expected it, her heart sinks a little as she tightens her hatches for the onslaught. They've been through this before: perceived betrayal (okay, this time, a little more than "perceived" - she had turned him into the police, after all) followed either by stony silence or vicious commentary in front of the majority of the student body. More often the latter, actually. So, she is prepared, even though it makes her stomach ache a little more. It is even worse now than before, because she knows what it is like to have him.
Nothing, no words or eye contact for the rest of the day, until a hand reaches out at the end of school and yanks her into the newspaper office. It is mostly dark, and completely deserted, except for them.
His words surprise her, though the intensity in his eyes does not. "I need to know, Veronica," he says in a loud whisper, his voice gravelly, not at all the viciousness she expected.
"Need to know what?" she asks cautiously. There are so many things left to explain between them, she doesn't know which part he means.
"Whether or not you went back to him."
She blinks up at him. Even in the moment, it feels like it happens in slow motions, like a cartoonist's depiction of surprise. Of everything he would want to know, this is the last she would have guessed. Still, she repeats, "Went back to him?" to make sure she hasn't misunderstood.
He grips her arm quickly, and too tightly, but she hardly notices. "Don't play dumb, Veronica," he rasps out. "Yes, went back to him. Did you get back together with Duncan after you found out you weren't his sister, and... and who killed Lilly." He stumbles a little over Lilly's name, omitting the crucial detail about that scenario that hangs over both their heads. But he moves past it quickly, almost too fast for her to follow, and is staring at her intently, eyes darting all over her face, searching for something.
She shakes her head. Shouldn't he know all this? Didn't he talk to Duncan? But instead she says, "No. No, I didn't. I couldn't, when I still..." her voice trails off, uncertain as to the reception the words to follow would receive. But he seems to want to hear them, so she finishes, "When I still care about you."
All at once, his grip on her arm relaxes, but his hands are on her back, pulling her to him, and his lips are insistent upon hers, like he could suck the truth from between them if he just wants it enough. She wraps her arms around his neck, hanging on for dear life, clinging to this second chance. Enough, she tries to tell herself, it is enough to have even this moment of forgiveness, of reprieve, even if it doesn't last.
And it can't last, can it? Things have never worked that way for Veronica Mars.
Author: addictedtojoy
Pairing/Character: Logan/Veronica
Word Count: 913
Rating: PG-13
Summary: They don't write handbooks for this.
Spoilers/Warnings: everything up to and including the season finale (and hopes for September)
A/N: Unbetaed, so please forgive my spelling errors. Because of the weird computer situation at home (oh, for the internet of residence!) I am posting this without running it by my beta first. Long story, short, please be kind and try to see past any glaring errors you might find. This may become part of a longer work, or maybe not. I haven't decided yet, and I guess any/all feedback I receive may help me make that decision. So, if you have an opinion either way, let me know.
She's pretty sure that this is the way it's supposed to be, but sometimes it's hard to tell. Complete silence from the one she most wants to talk to, and too many words from those she really doesn't. They don't write handbooks for this, nothing titled "How to fix things between you and your ex-boyfriend, who is also the ex-boyfriend of your dead best friend and whose father you helped put in jail two months ago." Even Jerry Springer never had material this good.
The summer passes in a sun-drenched haze. Cases, beach with Wallace, the usual pretense of living that she has grown accustomed to over the last year and a half. Almost two years now, and isn't it funny how you can go on living without ever actually taking a breath?
She has been non-breathing for a while now.
When September comes, she has a hard time imagining what school will be like. She hasn't been back since the night Aaron tried to burn her alive. Maybe an attempt on your life and a severely-burned father got you a get-out-of-jail-free card these days. Then again, this is Neptune. That kind of shit was practically routine. She is kind of surprised they let her get out of the last few weeks of school so easily.
So, senior year now, and Neptune High is once again foreign ground. Everything was easy with Lilly there, and then nearly intolerable without her. Then, for a while, it was actually okay, with Logan and Wallace and Weevil. But now... well, now hardly bears thinking about. She finds herself continually running her fingers over her pockets, then chastizing herself for wanting to pull out her cell phone every time and check if he'd called.
He'd never called.
Really, she knows she shouldn't be surprised. Would she have called, if their situations had been reversed? After all, wasn't she the one who told Meg she'd didn't forgive the people who'd hurt her? And even though she'd made an exception for him, that night at the disastrous surprise un-birthday party (before she'd found the cameras) she didn't really expect him to do the same for her. Her forgiveness had lasted so short a time, too, that maybe he hadn't noticed.
...
The first morning, first day (how cruel could the universe get?) she sees him in the hallway. In fact, they share a homeroom, and isn't that poetic. He doesn't meet her eyes, and she knows that he hates her. Even though she expected it, her heart sinks a little as she tightens her hatches for the onslaught. They've been through this before: perceived betrayal (okay, this time, a little more than "perceived" - she had turned him into the police, after all) followed either by stony silence or vicious commentary in front of the majority of the student body. More often the latter, actually. So, she is prepared, even though it makes her stomach ache a little more. It is even worse now than before, because she knows what it is like to have him.
Nothing, no words or eye contact for the rest of the day, until a hand reaches out at the end of school and yanks her into the newspaper office. It is mostly dark, and completely deserted, except for them.
His words surprise her, though the intensity in his eyes does not. "I need to know, Veronica," he says in a loud whisper, his voice gravelly, not at all the viciousness she expected.
"Need to know what?" she asks cautiously. There are so many things left to explain between them, she doesn't know which part he means.
"Whether or not you went back to him."
She blinks up at him. Even in the moment, it feels like it happens in slow motions, like a cartoonist's depiction of surprise. Of everything he would want to know, this is the last she would have guessed. Still, she repeats, "Went back to him?" to make sure she hasn't misunderstood.
He grips her arm quickly, and too tightly, but she hardly notices. "Don't play dumb, Veronica," he rasps out. "Yes, went back to him. Did you get back together with Duncan after you found out you weren't his sister, and... and who killed Lilly." He stumbles a little over Lilly's name, omitting the crucial detail about that scenario that hangs over both their heads. But he moves past it quickly, almost too fast for her to follow, and is staring at her intently, eyes darting all over her face, searching for something.
She shakes her head. Shouldn't he know all this? Didn't he talk to Duncan? But instead she says, "No. No, I didn't. I couldn't, when I still..." her voice trails off, uncertain as to the reception the words to follow would receive. But he seems to want to hear them, so she finishes, "When I still care about you."
All at once, his grip on her arm relaxes, but his hands are on her back, pulling her to him, and his lips are insistent upon hers, like he could suck the truth from between them if he just wants it enough. She wraps her arms around his neck, hanging on for dear life, clinging to this second chance. Enough, she tries to tell herself, it is enough to have even this moment of forgiveness, of reprieve, even if it doesn't last.
And it can't last, can it? Things have never worked that way for Veronica Mars.