It had to happen eventually
Allow me to preface my tale with a bit of background info. My parents, as some of you may know, live in rural Oklahoma. My father works graveyards, and in his spare time he likes to drink. A lot. And when he drinks he tends to get bored, which is when he likes to call me. Yes my father drunk dials me. Often. This leads me to the events of this morning, when he was doing said drinking and decided to do said drunk dialing. But I, like a good little girl, was at work and therefore did not answer my phone any of the 5 times he called me. So he decided to call around to my friends in Oklahoma to see if any of them had talked to me today. They, of course had not, as I have a policy about making social calls at the ass crack of dawn. (I go to work at 7am) At this point he has worked himself up into a drunken panic and decides that it is time to get the police involved as I'm now probably lying in a ditch somewhere bleeding to death. So he calls the Hayward police department, who call me. I, of course, still am at work where my phone is still on silent so I am still not answering it. So they send an officer to my house. That's right, the cops showed up on my doorstep, sending my poor landlord Chris into a bit of a panic himself. He calls me, also getting no answer. Then he calls our roommate Nicole. But Nicole is in San Diego, as this is where she works 4 days out of the week. So all she can do is call me too, and leave yet another panicked voicemail. Oh wait, there is something else she can do. She has
maelstrome's number, she can call him. So now he's calling me panicking and freaking out as well. But all anyone in this state knows is that the cops and my dad are looking for me. So in his half awake and allergy-medicated state,
maelstrome is plotting our escape to Mexico or Canada. Now remember that all of this is occurring while I'm sitting at work minding my own business and oblivious to all. But then at a little before 9am I decide to take a break. I check my messages and holy shit! So I spend nearly an hour on the phone with my parents, my roommates, my boyfriend, various friends in Oklahoma, and the Hayward police trying to get this straightened out. Now I'm looking for the hidden cameras, because if this isn't some sort of prank it should be.