Kurt's Diary 1/10
Title: Kurt's Diary
Author:K-Lee
Rating: NC-17 in later chapters
Summary: Kurt's feelings for Blaine.
Spoliers: From the episode, 'Never Been Kissed'
Dear Diary,
Bullying is a tragedy. Why we go through it, who knows? Of course, others are idiots and very narrow-minded. My first encounter with another boy like me was at Dalton Academy.
Dalton Academy is an all-boys private school who also happens to be out competition. I wasn't doing recon for glee business, it was or personal business. As I entered the school, I asked a boy to tell me what was going on. Apparently the Warblers, their glee club, throws impromtu performances. He led me down a shortcut and I swear my skin tingled where his fingers held my hand. He left me to sing with the glee club and boy was he good. He sung 'Teenage Dream' and his version was better than the original. My heart burst with joy when he would throw glances at me. His eyes were....marvelous. They had this intensity that no one else had.
Of course, I was a bad spy. He found me out and confronted me with his two best friends. The boy's name was Blaine and after asking a very humiliating question on their sexuality, I found he was gay. His two friends were straight with girlfriends and and they were actually sitting next to each other! None of the others moved over at the sight of Blaine and i knew they were an accepting bunch. Blaine must have seen my jelousness, for he asked his friends to leave. He told me he understood what I was going through and regretted running away. He told me to face my fears and stand up for myself.
The next day I did and damn Karofsky took me by suprise. He kissed me! My first kiss was with an overgrown oaf that smells like sweat and meat. His lips tasted like hamburgers and I wanted to gag, but his hands were firmly on my face. He pulled away and I could see my shocked reflecion through his eyes. I never knew self-loathing was a possibility of bullying.
Yesterday, i asked Blaine to talk to Karofsky. But, Karofsky wouldn't listen and instead pushed Blaine. Just at that scene I had an adrenaline rush and pushed the jock that I would have never thought I would fight back to. Karofsky looked at the two of us and left. All I could do was sit in the stairs, before I fell. Blaine offered to buy me some lunch and we talked. About our families. About our closest friends. About anything that didn't involve Karofsky or bullying.
That night I lay in my bed, wondering how I could have met someone as incredible as Blaine. He was sweet and understanding and funny all at the same time. Plus, I couldn't get over his nose. That perfect nose that had no word to describe it. A shame, if you ask me. Nothing could compare to Blaine and soon Blaine was i every fantasy I had. The fantasies about singing. The fantasies about my future. Even the fantasies of sex. Like a normal gay teenage boy, I practice on bananas and watch porn when my dad isn't home, but now every man I imagined the banana was owned by turned to Blaine. I could see his smiling face, when he was please after our incredible sex. His exctasy face when I was still sucking him off. It made me come quicker than anyone else.
Blaine had asked me to dinner tommorrow night. I'm excited but nervous and hope that our date goes well. I have to go and find the perfect outfit. Maybe my new Marc Jacobs sweater will blow him away. XD
Love,
Kurt