3 more weeks
3 more weeks until graduation and I'm terrified. Everything is just piling up and its starting to get to me. I want to enjoy my final days here at UT but its tough when Im trying to find a job, trying to manage relationships, and trying to figure out what it is I want to do with my life. My schedule is packed full of worthless end of year projects, papers and tests, and I dont know where I will be or what I will be doing come July. I can't remember a time when I didnt have at least some semblance of a plan for the short term. Im hoping that once graduation comes, my lack of a plan won't feel so suffocating and that I may actually be able to embrace the fact that I can now do anything I want, be anything I want, and its all up to me to decide which course of action to take.
However, if theres one thing i've realized recently, its that I dont actually enjoy making choices. In fact, i'm awful at it. I hate committing to things because I always second guess myself and wonder if I made the right choice. Consequently, I think I've missed out on a lot of things because I never just went for it. Well, its time to starting going for it (whatever it is), or there will be nothing left for me to go for.
However, if theres one thing i've realized recently, its that I dont actually enjoy making choices. In fact, i'm awful at it. I hate committing to things because I always second guess myself and wonder if I made the right choice. Consequently, I think I've missed out on a lot of things because I never just went for it. Well, its time to starting going for it (whatever it is), or there will be nothing left for me to go for.