Hoarders
A few months ago I started watching Hoarders on A&E. The show has a profound effect but it should have had me bawling my eyes out. But it didn't for some strange reason. Perhaps it's because I could not identify with the type of hoarding I see on the show. It should have a very strong emotional response because I grew up as the son of a hoarder.
My father grew up in the WWII days in Egypt. I think many people, because of the scarcity of things, ended up inflicted with this condition. My father was a paper and records hoarder. He was also an avid collector of things, but usually very precious things of value. Those things took up very little space, but the paper consumed our condo. After he passed away, my mom's living room was filled to the brim with boxes full of paper and trinkets. Because I had issues with going to her Condo for a few years, it was never tackled. Finally, when she was in Tahiti, I spent 3 or 4 days going through the boxes and getting rid of as much as I could. Most of the boxes were in the living room because my dad was going through them. He didn't want to leave all his stuff for us to go through.
I'm sure it's less now, but it's still an amazing amount of stuff which still consumes an entire den. And when I say consume, I mean consume. 12 feet by 12 feet, with maybe 6 square feet empty but the rest packed to the rafters. While my mom is in Egypt I hope to slowly go through it all and have it as close to empty as possible. At least her place is mostly empty except for that room.
I like to think my dad was a recovering hoarder. He was a wonderful man! If he wasn't, I might have resented him the way many of the children of hoarders seem to. I never had a girlfriend in high school, and was ashamed to bring friends to my home.
I was a hoarder on a smaller scale, accumulating worthless things for fear of possibly needing it in the future. I've read books on the subject and have no issues getting rid of things. Understanding the psychology was integral to my change. It helps that I knew what hoarding looked like, and never wanted that for myself. I still have the bad habit of leaving things where they are rather than put them in their place. Growing up in a cluttered home meant you never saw additional mess, so plates got left on couches, and I was often scolded for leaving dishes around (I could not eat at the dining room table because it was stacked with my dad's paper) and my dad always wanted me to vacuum even though very little floor showed. My dad was OCD about vacuuming, which I found bizarre. Why did the crumbs on the floor bother him and not the immense clutter?
I miss my dad terribly, and I wonder what he would think about the Hoarders show. Again, he was nowhere as bad as the people on the show, but there was definitely a very real problem. Thank goodness paper doesn't smell!!!