This is this. That I see more of your login name than I do of you. It's because the Nexus knew before I did that you would rather lose your company than even come to me for help. This is...
This is me feeling you wanted a pretty wife, a trophy on your arm and got a powerful mutant that didn't fit your ideals.
Augh. God.... I'm the biggest fuck up. I told you I'd make a horrible husband, and I am. I can't even keep a fucking company let alone the woman I adore.
Do you know how it felt, Adam? How it's felt all these months? I'm worth millions. On top of that? I'm a brilliant business woman. And yet you let your company fall to the hyenas rather than ask me for help.
Because that's the last thing I want if for you to have to worry about me! You already have a child on the way and no one wants some stupid man getting in their way. You have your own problems.
No, you're right. I should have asked for help. I should have gather the balls to ask you for help and had this taken care of months ago. But, you know what? I'm a moron and lousy husband. My father should have never left the company to me and I should have let it go to Derrek. He knew what he was doing.
I understand this. The feeling I have is that I've been too busy thinking that my life will be over if I loose the company rather than remembering that I already have a life with this wonderfully intelligent and funny woman and a dog that likes to eat my shoes. I already have a family and a life and this business that's soaked up everything, every ounce of my time has broken us apart. You want a divorce.
A divorce, Emma. That tells me I'm not doing my job as a husband and as you friend.
I notice you aren't denying it. It's true, isn't it? More than you wanted? It's a common theme amongst mutants that marry baseline humans. Not like it's the first time I've seen it, if it is true.
You lost the company in November, Adam. I barely see you, I don't even know what you're doing. I practically live alone now as it is, with you busy and Alex back with his parents.
And all I've done is wallow in this since November Adam. And than I was talking to Graydon about Raven and... and I nearly broke down crying over lunch with a man who, two months ago, would have killed me for breathing.
Alright. Honest, now. I feel like I am over my head, but I'm .... I have no clue what I'm doing. I want to fix this, Emma. I want to make you happy more than anything in the world. Now, I'm going to do a rather idiotic thing and ask what I have to do, specifically, to make you happy.
Spending more time at home isn't going to solve this if I'm always in Kansas trying to dig up my past. I'll drop the project and come to New York in full. I'll find a ...something, some sort of job in New York with you and the baby.
I'm not looking for a slave, Adam. If I wished that, I could have it. What I want is a partner. But in the end, Alex acted as more of one than you have since you lost the company.
And then your answer was for me to do what I would and you expect me to accept you're happy when all you do is remind me that I'm sweet and kind.
Do you really know me, Adam? That's what I worry about.
Can you explain to me, without accusing yourself of being inadequate, what you were thinking? Why you don't trust me? Why you would rather lose your family's company without asking me for help?
Can you tell me if you don't really feel in over your head with Emma Frost as your wife?
Because all my life I've been told that I can't be successful, and here I am faced with this huge problem and I act like a deer in the headlights. I wanted to prove that I can do something big on my own. No executives. No advisers. Just me.
I do trust you, Emma. I trust you more than I trust even myself. But if I asked for your help it could have been just like everything else. You'd find a way have someone help me do this. Not teach me to do it myself. And I...I can't do that. Not when I finally landed the woman of my dreams. My old man raised me to not show weakness in front of the wife. I try not to, but it still shows sometimes.
Emma Frost, the White Queen? Scares the piss out of me because she's far more witty, far more intelligent, and way better with stress than I am and that intimidates me. Emma Frost-Douglas, wife to the dorkiest farm boy even to leave Olathe, Kansas? Not so much. I feel at home with her, in her arms, and beside her. I feel like I have won the New York Marathon being with you, Emma...
So your answer was to prove him right? That, instead of doing whatever it took to prove him wrong, you let it own you? My Father? Told me I was trash, that I had no hope of being as good as my siblings.
Then the bastard left me the company. Do you know where my siblings are? Did you even know I have any? Well here it is. Two are dead, one is in a home. One of my own sisters? I shot rather than let her ruin my life.
I would have... Jesus christ, Adam. That is just... stupid. What did you learn from your way? How to further dwell in what your past is? Is that what you want? A reason to think you're wrong and broken? It's a little late to teach when you have nothing left. It's a little late when you have proven you would rather wallow than even tell me the truth!
Don't you get it?
They're the same person, Adam. There aren't two women. There is only one. Me. Wife. Mother. Business woman. And, yes, Queen.
This is this. That I see more of your login name than I do of you. It's because the Nexus knew before I did that you would rather lose your company than even come to me for help. This is...
This is me feeling you wanted a pretty wife, a trophy on your arm and got a powerful mutant that didn't fit your ideals.
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...........
Augh. God.... I'm the biggest fuck up. I told you I'd make a horrible husband, and I am. I can't even keep a fucking company let alone the woman I adore.
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Do you know how it felt, Adam? How it's felt all these months? I'm worth millions. On top of that? I'm a brilliant business woman. And yet you let your company fall to the hyenas rather than ask me for help.
Why?
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No, you're right. I should have asked for help. I should have gather the balls to ask you for help and had this taken care of months ago. But, you know what? I'm a moron and lousy husband. My father should have never left the company to me and I should have let it go to Derrek. He knew what he was doing.
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It's about me feeling you would have been happier if I never got my powers back from Hermes. That you would have been happier... With anyone but me.
And this isn't accusation. This isn't saying it's how it is. This is how I feel.
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A divorce, Emma. That tells me I'm not doing my job as a husband and as you friend.
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You lost the company in November, Adam. I barely see you, I don't even know what you're doing. I practically live alone now as it is, with you busy and Alex back with his parents.
And all I've done is wallow in this since November Adam. And than I was talking to Graydon about Raven and... and I nearly broke down crying over lunch with a man who, two months ago, would have killed me for breathing.
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Alright. Honest, now. I feel like I am over my head, but I'm .... I have no clue what I'm doing. I want to fix this, Emma. I want to make you happy more than anything in the world. Now, I'm going to do a rather idiotic thing and ask what I have to do, specifically, to make you happy.
Spending more time at home isn't going to solve this if I'm always in Kansas trying to dig up my past. I'll drop the project and come to New York in full. I'll find a ...something, some sort of job in New York with you and the baby.
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And then your answer was for me to do what I would and you expect me to accept you're happy when all you do is remind me that I'm sweet and kind.
Do you really know me, Adam? That's what I worry about.
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Can you tell me if you don't really feel in over your head with Emma Frost as your wife?
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I do trust you, Emma. I trust you more than I trust even myself. But if I asked for your help it could have been just like everything else. You'd find a way have someone help me do this. Not teach me to do it myself. And I...I can't do that. Not when I finally landed the woman of my dreams. My old man raised me to not show weakness in front of the wife. I try not to, but it still shows sometimes.
Emma Frost, the White Queen? Scares the piss out of me because she's far more witty, far more intelligent, and way better with stress than I am and that intimidates me. Emma Frost-Douglas, wife to the dorkiest farm boy even to leave Olathe, Kansas? Not so much. I feel at home with her, in her arms, and beside her. I feel like I have won the New York Marathon being with you, Emma...
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Then the bastard left me the company. Do you know where my siblings are? Did you even know I have any? Well here it is. Two are dead, one is in a home. One of my own sisters? I shot rather than let her ruin my life.
I would have... Jesus christ, Adam. That is just... stupid. What did you learn from your way? How to further dwell in what your past is? Is that what you want? A reason to think you're wrong and broken? It's a little late to teach when you have nothing left. It's a little late when you have proven you would rather wallow than even tell me the truth!
Don't you get it?
They're the same person, Adam. There aren't two women. There is only one. Me. Wife. Mother. Business woman. And, yes, Queen.
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