gloomy prospects
i knew it. i knew this day would come. drifting through life in a dream come true would only keep me afloat for so long. i'm so fickle. i reek of obsession and lust for a wider circle of friends. i have been a shut in too long. i'm moving out. but all i want to do is drown my inner monologue, marinate it in tequila. what if what i'm thinking slips out? what if what i'm imagining comes true? i shudder to think i would stoop to measures of diversion i never thought my self capable of. but i want it so bad i can taste it. i love and love and love and love and love. if it only weren't so much. i'm tearing my own heart out and watching myself writhe in my death throes on the floor, but wondering how come i have blood on my hands. i hate my obsessions. they overpower me.