Thanksgiving -- Private Thoughts
Thanksgiving is just around the corner. I can't believe November is already half way over. Danny and I got to talking about the holiday and family traditions this weekend. Our family tradition for Thanksgiving...is attempting to be 'American' about it. We have turkey and stuffing, we watch the Macy's Day Parade...but that's about it.
It's weird -- I never realized it until I was in college just how insular my family is. There's my father, mother and two sisters...and that's it. Everyone else is in Spain. Unlike my friends from school, I never went to a relative's in the country or spent the day jumping in leaves or watching football...I always wanted to, though.
It's silly, but I still want that. I love my family and I love my culture...but there's this little girl -- my father's daughter -- who wants a big family Thanksgiving with relatives and leaf-jumping, little kids running around and football watching...
I told Danny about it... it was...less awkward than it could have been. We've only been going out a short while and there I am babbling about...family and kids and all of that...but he understood...that I didn't mean him or expect anything from him. Like I said -- it could have been way more awkward, but it wasn't. He didn't think it was silly for wanting those things, even though I still think it is...
My sister, when we were little, wanted blond hair and blue eyes, because that's what was 'in' -- we lost our accents and spoke only English at school. But as much as she wanted, she would never grow up to be blond haired with blue eyes. Sure, she could have gotten hair dye and contacts -- but she couldn't physically turn into this Barbie doll. You don't just...change ethnicities or backgrounds over night -- or really at all.
The All-American image, for those who don't resemble it, is a fairytale, like my imaginary Thanksgiving. You don't just wake up with a big family one morning, or relatives in the country or little kids throwing leaves. It takes more than that.
I suppose I've started to wonder lately if one day I'll wake up...and it'll be too late.
It's weird -- I never realized it until I was in college just how insular my family is. There's my father, mother and two sisters...and that's it. Everyone else is in Spain. Unlike my friends from school, I never went to a relative's in the country or spent the day jumping in leaves or watching football...I always wanted to, though.
It's silly, but I still want that. I love my family and I love my culture...but there's this little girl -- my father's daughter -- who wants a big family Thanksgiving with relatives and leaf-jumping, little kids running around and football watching...
I told Danny about it... it was...less awkward than it could have been. We've only been going out a short while and there I am babbling about...family and kids and all of that...but he understood...that I didn't mean him or expect anything from him. Like I said -- it could have been way more awkward, but it wasn't. He didn't think it was silly for wanting those things, even though I still think it is...
My sister, when we were little, wanted blond hair and blue eyes, because that's what was 'in' -- we lost our accents and spoke only English at school. But as much as she wanted, she would never grow up to be blond haired with blue eyes. Sure, she could have gotten hair dye and contacts -- but she couldn't physically turn into this Barbie doll. You don't just...change ethnicities or backgrounds over night -- or really at all.
The All-American image, for those who don't resemble it, is a fairytale, like my imaginary Thanksgiving. You don't just wake up with a big family one morning, or relatives in the country or little kids throwing leaves. It takes more than that.
I suppose I've started to wonder lately if one day I'll wake up...and it'll be too late.