Charmed fic: And all our heroes lose their shine
Title: And all our heroes lose their shine
Fandom: Charmed
Characters: Wyatt, Chris
Rating: PG-13
Summary: A young Wyatt is grieving and Chris doesn't know what to do. Chris, Wyatt brotherfic. Oneshot.
“Where are you going?” Chris asks, standing in the doorway to Wyatt’s bedroom. His brother nearly jumps in surprise, and turns sheepishly towards Chris.
“Shouldn’t you be asleep?” Wyatt says.
“Shouldn’t you?” Chris shoots back.
“I’m just meeting some friends Chris.”
“You’re sneaking out?” Chris says. Then he smiles, “Mom is gonna be so mad!”
“You better not tell her!” Wyatt hisses. “I mean it Chris! This has to be between us.”
“Then let me come with you!” Chris says.
“No way, you’re too young,” Wyatt replies. “Besides, these are my friends, not yours. Promise me you won’t go blabbing to Mom.”
Chris pulls a face but grudgingly agrees. He stomps off to his room, calling Wyatt all sorts of names. But before he can think of anything really creative, he’s already fallen asleep.
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In the morning Chris pauses on the stairs. His stomach is grumbling and he wants breakfast, but he stops because he can tell that something is wrong. He peeks around the landing and sees his brother and parents sitting in the living room. His parents’ expressions are dark and serious, and Wyatt… Chris does a double-take, because there’s no way that Wyatt is crying! His mother has her arm around him, and his brother has he face pressed against her shoulder. Wyatt looks up, bloodshot eyes meeting Chris’, and Chris doesn’t know why, but he turns and runs back up the stairs, out of sight.
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Chris stays in his room, hungry and confused, for what seems like forever. He can’t get the look on Wyatt’s face out of his mind. It doesn’t make sense, Wyatt is strong and brave and he doesn’t cry. Okay, so maybe once in a while he would, and he sure was a crybaby when they were little, but he hasn’t done it in a long, long time. So what had happened? What could have happened to make him so sad? It scares Chris, and he wracks his brain, coming up with horrific scenarios. Fear creeps into him, because maybe someone in the family had died. What if it was Aunt Paige, or Aunt Phoebe, or Lena? Each moment that passes seems like an eternity as Chris waits for someone to come upstairs and tell him. He can barely stand the wait, and considers going back downstairs; facing whatever doom is waiting head on rather than hiding like a baby. But he doesn’t. As the minutes continue on and on, he wishes that someone were there with him. He wants someone to hold him and tell him everything is alright, but the only person he really wants to do that is Wyatt, and Wyatt is too upset to comfort anyone. It frightens him, knowing that his brother is so messed up, and he doesn’t know what to do.
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Finally there’s a knock at the door. Chris sucks in a nervous breath as the door opens and his father quietly enters. “You’re awake?” Leo asks. “How long have you been waiting up here?”
Chris just shakes his head, waiting for the explanation of what’s going on.
“Wyatt’s friend… Nick Chiaro is dead,” Leo says.
“Nick?” Chris repeats. He feels relieved and that just makes him feel guilty. He should not be relieved that Wyatt’s best friend is dead, but he can’t help but be happy that it isn’t anyone in his family.
“Wyatt snuck out last night and met up with Nick and Brad. They went vanquishing and… Nick was killed by the demons they were fighting.”
“Is Wyatt okay?” Chris asks quickly. If Nick was killed while Wyatt was right there… then those demons must’ve been crazy strong.
“He’s a little banged up,” Leo concedes. “He said there were more demons than they were expecting.” Leo shakes his head, voice quavering. “Anyway, I need you to put on something nice - your black suit I guess. I’ll make you something for breakfast and then we’re all going over to Nick’s mother’s house.”
“Do I have to go?” Chris asks, heart pounding at the idea of entering that house, of having to face the mother’s grief.
“Yes you have to,” Leo responds. “They believe that the body has to be buried within three days of dying. She’s having the wake today and the funeral will be tomorrow.”
“Already? But… don’t they need to… to embalm the body or something?”
“They don’t believe in preserving the body.”
“Is it going to smell bad?”
“Chris, please, just get changed.” Chris falls silent and nods, walking over to his closet. Leo seems relieved, and he leaves the room as Chris pulls on his suit pants.
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Breakfast sits like a rock in his stomach as he stands in the Chiaro living room. The furniture has been moved and there is a casket where the TV would probably go. They dressed Nick up in a suit before they stuck him in there. Chris hadn’t wanted to look, but Leo had led him up to the kneeler in front of the casket with the rest of the family. Nick does smell funny, but heavy perfumes have been sprayed throughout the room, and so it’s mostly covered. There are cuts on Nick’s face, and Chris wonders what the death blow was. If he pulls back the shirt would he see a huge gash? Did they have to twist his neck back straight again? Is his spine severed somewhere? He almost asks, but then he sees the dead expression on Wyatt’s face and he keeps his mouth shut.
Wyatt does not say anything. His face is very white, just like Nick’s is, and if he hadn’t been moving every now and then he might’ve been mistaken for dead. He just stands in the corner silently, staring at his shoes. Chris almost goes to him once or twice, but something stops him. He’s no good at comforting people anyway, and he doesn’t know what to say to Wyatt. So he leaves him alone.
The whole family is there. He sees Aunt Paige whispering to Nick’s mother, holding her hands. Uncle Alec is talking with some of the other witches, and Chris catches enough of their conversation to know that they’re discussing the plans for the funeral tomorrow. It will be a very witchy funeral apparently, with white candles and blessings and everything. Chris has never been to one, and he’s interested in what it will be like. Aunt Phoebe and his mother are standing together in the corner opposite Wyatt, but they’re not talking, they’re just standing. Even little Lena is there; she’s holding Wyatt’s hand and not saying anything at all. Chris can’t help but think that holding Wyatt’s hand isn’t really that helpful of a thing, but he doesn’t turn to her or pull away from her.
Nick’s sister is Chris’ age, and though he’s never really spoken to her before, she walks straight over to him. He stiffens, not sure what to say to her. “There’s a hole in his chest,” she says without so much as greeting him.
“What?” Chris asks, confused.
“Nick… there’s a hole in his chest. Mom says his heart was burned right out of him. That’s why Wyatt couldn’t heal him.”
Chris feels slightly sick at this revelation, and he imagines Wyatt putting his hands on a gaping bloody hole and trying to heal it back up. He imagines Wyatt covered in gore and screaming futilely. His brother had never been able to accept defeat, and had always been proud of his powers and how many people he’s helped. This must have hit like a terrible blow. He glances over at Wyatt, and thinks that maybe the expression on his face is just one acknowledging this awful failure.
“Why are you telling me this?” Chris asks.
She shrugs. “Nobody will talk to me, all they want to do is say how they’re really sorry. But I don’t know…”
“Aren’t you sad?”
She shrugs again. “Mom is sad; really sad. But… it’s just really weird. I mean yesterday was totally normal, and then I went to sleep, and then this morning I went downstairs to find my mom sobbing and my brother dead. I don’t think I’ve caught up with it all yet. Are you sad?”
Chris is taken aback by the question. “I don’t know.”
She nods, as if this is the answer she was expecting. Some adult comes over and takes her by the hand, leads her away. She turns back to Chris for a minute and smiles a little. Chris can’t bring himself to smile back.
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It seems like forever before they finally go home. Chris is tired from standing around, and the food at the wake tasted bad, or maybe it was just that the perfume in the house had made him nauseous. Wyatt goes straight to his room as soon as they get back, and Chris wonders if his brother is hungry. He must be, since he hadn’t seen Wyatt eat any breakfast, or have snacks at the wake.
“Come on Chris, I’ll fix you something,” Piper says, leading him to the kitchen. There are tear tracks on her face but she remains in control of her emotions while she whips together a hoagie. She pours potato chips on the plate and slices up a melon too. Chris sits at the table and dutifully eats it, even though it too has the same weird taste as the food at the wake. When he finally chokes down the last of the sandwich, his mother puts a plate of cookies in front of him. He looks up at her, and it seems like she’s not really there at all. She’s on auto-pilot, doing what needs to be done but not really involved in it at all. He has one cookie in his mouth when the house shakes and there’s a series of thuds and bangs from upstairs. He nearly chokes, and his mother runs from the room. He hears her footsteps on the stairs, hears Wyatt’s bedroom door open, and then he hears shouting.
Forgetting about the cookies, he climbs the stairs and stands outside of his brother’s room. It’s been trashed, and in the middle of the broken furniture and mess of clothes and books, Wyatt is shouting obscenities at his mother. Piper for her part barely reacts, letting him vent. But Chris is angry at Wyatt for saying these things, and when Wyatt raises his hands, Chris hits him with telekinesis and shoves him backwards. Wyatt lands on his rear, looking surprised. That’s the first real emotion Chris has seen on his face since Nick died.
“Chris!” Piper admonishes, and Chris’ face goes red. Why is he being reprimanded? But Wyatt doesn’t react, he just sits on the floor in his mess of a room and doesn’t say anything at all.
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The funeral is terrible. Chris sits beside Wyatt for it, and almost immediately wishes that someone else had sat with his brother. Wyatt is stiff and silent throughout, but at one point he grabs Chris’ hand and squeezes it so hard that Chris imagines his bones snapping into pieces.
At the end of the service, Mrs. Chiaro throws herself on her son’s coffin, screaming and sobbing. The action has a ripple effect and soon almost everyone has burst into tears. Chris fights for his own composure, even though he never really knew Nick, and he notices that Nick’s sister is crying hard. But then Wyatt begins to tremble, and Chris looks up to see tears running down his brother’s face. He doesn’t know what to do, he just sits there staring at Wyatt. The blond lowers his head into his hands and Chris awkwardly rubs his back. Thankfully his mother takes over, drawing Wyatt against her, a mirror to the position Chris found them in the previous morning. Chris raises his hand, intent on trying to comfort his brother, but he lets it fall back beside him. He doesn’t know what to do.
Eventually Mrs. Chiaro is pried off of the coffin and everyone exits the mausoleum. Wyatt trudges ahead of the rest of the family. He loosens his tie and throws it on the ground. Leo bends and picks it up, but he doesn’t try to catch up with Wyatt. Chris thinks his brother looks greatly diminished as he walks, head down and hands in his pockets. He barely resembles the boy Chris has looked up to his entire life.
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Chris lays awake that night and the next and the next. Wyatt has been reclusive ever since the funeral, not speaking to anyone. Piper and Leo have run out of ideas, and Chris finds his worry over his brother keeping him up.
Chris’ ceiling is covered with glow-in-the-dark stars in the shape of constellations, and he has spent many nights staring up at them. He traces Orion with his eyes, remembering how Wyatt had looked over a star map and then waved his hand, orbing all of the stars into perfect formation on his ceiling. Wyatt had shrugged in response to Chris’ enthusiastic applause at this display of magical prowess, but there had been a smile tugging at his lips.
Chris hears Wyatt tossing and turning on the other side of the wall and sighs. He wants to do something, but he doesn’t know what. Grief is not something Chris has had much experience with, and Wyatt’s grief is stronger than anything he has ever seen. It has swallowed up his brother, overtaken him with such force. Chris’ only foray with grief had been when his best friend died in a car crash. He remembers holding her hand in the hospital, and sitting through the funeral; but more than that he remembers Wyatt’s quiet strength. Wyatt had stayed beside him the entire time, holding him while he cried, and comforting him when he could not. He thinks of Wyatt climbing into his bed and kissing his forehead when he couldn’t sleep; strong arms encircling him.
Chris’ face flushes with shame as he recalls this. His brother had been there for him, but what has Chris done for Wyatt?
Chris slips out of his bed and creeps to Wyatt’s room. A spell had repaired the damage Wyatt had inflicted on it, and so Chris sees that it is as clean and orderly as usual when he pushes the door open. Wyatt stares at him from his place on the bed, but he does not ask Chris why he is there. So Chris says nothing, he just climbs into bed with Wyatt. “I’m sorry Wy,” he whispers, laying his head on his brother’s chest. He loops his arm across Wyatt and rubs his arm. Wyatt stiffens and then relaxes into the touch. Chris tries to mirror what Wyatt had done for him, tries to think like his brother as Wyatt begins to shake. He leans forward, and plants a kiss in Wyatt’s hair. Wyatt clings to him, and cries himself to sleep.
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Chris wakes up stiff and sore, Wyatt lying on his arm. He props himself up with his other arm, trying to decide if he can roll Wyatt off without waking him. But then he catches sight of the peaceful expression on the older boy’s face and decides to do nothing. He rests his head on Wyatt’s shoulder and closes his eyes, listening to Wyatt’s soft breaths. He tightens his hold on Wyatt.
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When Chris wakes again, Wyatt is standing by the window, looking outside. Chris rolls towards him, surveying him. There’s something about his posture and his stance that’s just so Wyatt, that Chris finds himself sighing in relief. When his brother turns to him, he can still see grief in the corners of his eyes, but it is no longer crushing him.
“It happened so fast,” Wyatt says. Chris sits up straighter, amazed that his brother’s silence is suddenly breaking. “One minute we were alone and the next… we were surrounded. Brad just took off… he just ran off on us. I looked for Nick… I just wanted to orb us both out of there, but he was already far away from me… he wanted to stay and fight. By the time I… I turned away for one second, and when I looked back he was on the ground. There was… there was this huge hole in his chest and blood everywhere and I knew… I knew he was already dead, but I tried to heal him anyway. And it didn’t work.” Tears fall down Wyatt’s face and he swipes at them. “I really tried.”
“It wasn’t your fault…” Chris says awkwardly. He repeats the line again, adding more conviction. Even if Wyatt can’t believe him, Chris knows it’s true. “You can’t save everybody.”
“I know,” Wyatt mutters. “I know. Nick was always reckless, no one could stop him when he wanted to do something.”
Chris reaches out to him, grabs his hand like Lena did at the wake. Wyatt suddenly pulls his hand away and instead embraces Chris tightly. “It could have been you, Chris, it could have been you,” Wyatt whispers, and Chris isn’t even sure that he meant to say it out loud. Is this what has really been eating up his brother? “I don’t know what I would have done if it was you.”
“It wasn’t,” Chris says. “It wasn’t and it won’t ever be. I believe in you, Wyatt, I believe in you.” Chris makes his promises over and over and Wyatt cries. Chris hopes that these are promises he can keep. When Wyatt finally releases him, he seems much calmer, more at peace than he has been in days. Chris smiles and stares up at Wyatt. The older boy is once again larger than life, once again the heroic older brother who can do anything. And Chris hopes that he stays that way forever.
Fandom: Charmed
Characters: Wyatt, Chris
Rating: PG-13
Summary: A young Wyatt is grieving and Chris doesn't know what to do. Chris, Wyatt brotherfic. Oneshot.
“Where are you going?” Chris asks, standing in the doorway to Wyatt’s bedroom. His brother nearly jumps in surprise, and turns sheepishly towards Chris.
“Shouldn’t you be asleep?” Wyatt says.
“Shouldn’t you?” Chris shoots back.
“I’m just meeting some friends Chris.”
“You’re sneaking out?” Chris says. Then he smiles, “Mom is gonna be so mad!”
“You better not tell her!” Wyatt hisses. “I mean it Chris! This has to be between us.”
“Then let me come with you!” Chris says.
“No way, you’re too young,” Wyatt replies. “Besides, these are my friends, not yours. Promise me you won’t go blabbing to Mom.”
Chris pulls a face but grudgingly agrees. He stomps off to his room, calling Wyatt all sorts of names. But before he can think of anything really creative, he’s already fallen asleep.
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In the morning Chris pauses on the stairs. His stomach is grumbling and he wants breakfast, but he stops because he can tell that something is wrong. He peeks around the landing and sees his brother and parents sitting in the living room. His parents’ expressions are dark and serious, and Wyatt… Chris does a double-take, because there’s no way that Wyatt is crying! His mother has her arm around him, and his brother has he face pressed against her shoulder. Wyatt looks up, bloodshot eyes meeting Chris’, and Chris doesn’t know why, but he turns and runs back up the stairs, out of sight.
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Chris stays in his room, hungry and confused, for what seems like forever. He can’t get the look on Wyatt’s face out of his mind. It doesn’t make sense, Wyatt is strong and brave and he doesn’t cry. Okay, so maybe once in a while he would, and he sure was a crybaby when they were little, but he hasn’t done it in a long, long time. So what had happened? What could have happened to make him so sad? It scares Chris, and he wracks his brain, coming up with horrific scenarios. Fear creeps into him, because maybe someone in the family had died. What if it was Aunt Paige, or Aunt Phoebe, or Lena? Each moment that passes seems like an eternity as Chris waits for someone to come upstairs and tell him. He can barely stand the wait, and considers going back downstairs; facing whatever doom is waiting head on rather than hiding like a baby. But he doesn’t. As the minutes continue on and on, he wishes that someone were there with him. He wants someone to hold him and tell him everything is alright, but the only person he really wants to do that is Wyatt, and Wyatt is too upset to comfort anyone. It frightens him, knowing that his brother is so messed up, and he doesn’t know what to do.
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Finally there’s a knock at the door. Chris sucks in a nervous breath as the door opens and his father quietly enters. “You’re awake?” Leo asks. “How long have you been waiting up here?”
Chris just shakes his head, waiting for the explanation of what’s going on.
“Wyatt’s friend… Nick Chiaro is dead,” Leo says.
“Nick?” Chris repeats. He feels relieved and that just makes him feel guilty. He should not be relieved that Wyatt’s best friend is dead, but he can’t help but be happy that it isn’t anyone in his family.
“Wyatt snuck out last night and met up with Nick and Brad. They went vanquishing and… Nick was killed by the demons they were fighting.”
“Is Wyatt okay?” Chris asks quickly. If Nick was killed while Wyatt was right there… then those demons must’ve been crazy strong.
“He’s a little banged up,” Leo concedes. “He said there were more demons than they were expecting.” Leo shakes his head, voice quavering. “Anyway, I need you to put on something nice - your black suit I guess. I’ll make you something for breakfast and then we’re all going over to Nick’s mother’s house.”
“Do I have to go?” Chris asks, heart pounding at the idea of entering that house, of having to face the mother’s grief.
“Yes you have to,” Leo responds. “They believe that the body has to be buried within three days of dying. She’s having the wake today and the funeral will be tomorrow.”
“Already? But… don’t they need to… to embalm the body or something?”
“They don’t believe in preserving the body.”
“Is it going to smell bad?”
“Chris, please, just get changed.” Chris falls silent and nods, walking over to his closet. Leo seems relieved, and he leaves the room as Chris pulls on his suit pants.
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Breakfast sits like a rock in his stomach as he stands in the Chiaro living room. The furniture has been moved and there is a casket where the TV would probably go. They dressed Nick up in a suit before they stuck him in there. Chris hadn’t wanted to look, but Leo had led him up to the kneeler in front of the casket with the rest of the family. Nick does smell funny, but heavy perfumes have been sprayed throughout the room, and so it’s mostly covered. There are cuts on Nick’s face, and Chris wonders what the death blow was. If he pulls back the shirt would he see a huge gash? Did they have to twist his neck back straight again? Is his spine severed somewhere? He almost asks, but then he sees the dead expression on Wyatt’s face and he keeps his mouth shut.
Wyatt does not say anything. His face is very white, just like Nick’s is, and if he hadn’t been moving every now and then he might’ve been mistaken for dead. He just stands in the corner silently, staring at his shoes. Chris almost goes to him once or twice, but something stops him. He’s no good at comforting people anyway, and he doesn’t know what to say to Wyatt. So he leaves him alone.
The whole family is there. He sees Aunt Paige whispering to Nick’s mother, holding her hands. Uncle Alec is talking with some of the other witches, and Chris catches enough of their conversation to know that they’re discussing the plans for the funeral tomorrow. It will be a very witchy funeral apparently, with white candles and blessings and everything. Chris has never been to one, and he’s interested in what it will be like. Aunt Phoebe and his mother are standing together in the corner opposite Wyatt, but they’re not talking, they’re just standing. Even little Lena is there; she’s holding Wyatt’s hand and not saying anything at all. Chris can’t help but think that holding Wyatt’s hand isn’t really that helpful of a thing, but he doesn’t turn to her or pull away from her.
Nick’s sister is Chris’ age, and though he’s never really spoken to her before, she walks straight over to him. He stiffens, not sure what to say to her. “There’s a hole in his chest,” she says without so much as greeting him.
“What?” Chris asks, confused.
“Nick… there’s a hole in his chest. Mom says his heart was burned right out of him. That’s why Wyatt couldn’t heal him.”
Chris feels slightly sick at this revelation, and he imagines Wyatt putting his hands on a gaping bloody hole and trying to heal it back up. He imagines Wyatt covered in gore and screaming futilely. His brother had never been able to accept defeat, and had always been proud of his powers and how many people he’s helped. This must have hit like a terrible blow. He glances over at Wyatt, and thinks that maybe the expression on his face is just one acknowledging this awful failure.
“Why are you telling me this?” Chris asks.
She shrugs. “Nobody will talk to me, all they want to do is say how they’re really sorry. But I don’t know…”
“Aren’t you sad?”
She shrugs again. “Mom is sad; really sad. But… it’s just really weird. I mean yesterday was totally normal, and then I went to sleep, and then this morning I went downstairs to find my mom sobbing and my brother dead. I don’t think I’ve caught up with it all yet. Are you sad?”
Chris is taken aback by the question. “I don’t know.”
She nods, as if this is the answer she was expecting. Some adult comes over and takes her by the hand, leads her away. She turns back to Chris for a minute and smiles a little. Chris can’t bring himself to smile back.
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It seems like forever before they finally go home. Chris is tired from standing around, and the food at the wake tasted bad, or maybe it was just that the perfume in the house had made him nauseous. Wyatt goes straight to his room as soon as they get back, and Chris wonders if his brother is hungry. He must be, since he hadn’t seen Wyatt eat any breakfast, or have snacks at the wake.
“Come on Chris, I’ll fix you something,” Piper says, leading him to the kitchen. There are tear tracks on her face but she remains in control of her emotions while she whips together a hoagie. She pours potato chips on the plate and slices up a melon too. Chris sits at the table and dutifully eats it, even though it too has the same weird taste as the food at the wake. When he finally chokes down the last of the sandwich, his mother puts a plate of cookies in front of him. He looks up at her, and it seems like she’s not really there at all. She’s on auto-pilot, doing what needs to be done but not really involved in it at all. He has one cookie in his mouth when the house shakes and there’s a series of thuds and bangs from upstairs. He nearly chokes, and his mother runs from the room. He hears her footsteps on the stairs, hears Wyatt’s bedroom door open, and then he hears shouting.
Forgetting about the cookies, he climbs the stairs and stands outside of his brother’s room. It’s been trashed, and in the middle of the broken furniture and mess of clothes and books, Wyatt is shouting obscenities at his mother. Piper for her part barely reacts, letting him vent. But Chris is angry at Wyatt for saying these things, and when Wyatt raises his hands, Chris hits him with telekinesis and shoves him backwards. Wyatt lands on his rear, looking surprised. That’s the first real emotion Chris has seen on his face since Nick died.
“Chris!” Piper admonishes, and Chris’ face goes red. Why is he being reprimanded? But Wyatt doesn’t react, he just sits on the floor in his mess of a room and doesn’t say anything at all.
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The funeral is terrible. Chris sits beside Wyatt for it, and almost immediately wishes that someone else had sat with his brother. Wyatt is stiff and silent throughout, but at one point he grabs Chris’ hand and squeezes it so hard that Chris imagines his bones snapping into pieces.
At the end of the service, Mrs. Chiaro throws herself on her son’s coffin, screaming and sobbing. The action has a ripple effect and soon almost everyone has burst into tears. Chris fights for his own composure, even though he never really knew Nick, and he notices that Nick’s sister is crying hard. But then Wyatt begins to tremble, and Chris looks up to see tears running down his brother’s face. He doesn’t know what to do, he just sits there staring at Wyatt. The blond lowers his head into his hands and Chris awkwardly rubs his back. Thankfully his mother takes over, drawing Wyatt against her, a mirror to the position Chris found them in the previous morning. Chris raises his hand, intent on trying to comfort his brother, but he lets it fall back beside him. He doesn’t know what to do.
Eventually Mrs. Chiaro is pried off of the coffin and everyone exits the mausoleum. Wyatt trudges ahead of the rest of the family. He loosens his tie and throws it on the ground. Leo bends and picks it up, but he doesn’t try to catch up with Wyatt. Chris thinks his brother looks greatly diminished as he walks, head down and hands in his pockets. He barely resembles the boy Chris has looked up to his entire life.
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Chris lays awake that night and the next and the next. Wyatt has been reclusive ever since the funeral, not speaking to anyone. Piper and Leo have run out of ideas, and Chris finds his worry over his brother keeping him up.
Chris’ ceiling is covered with glow-in-the-dark stars in the shape of constellations, and he has spent many nights staring up at them. He traces Orion with his eyes, remembering how Wyatt had looked over a star map and then waved his hand, orbing all of the stars into perfect formation on his ceiling. Wyatt had shrugged in response to Chris’ enthusiastic applause at this display of magical prowess, but there had been a smile tugging at his lips.
Chris hears Wyatt tossing and turning on the other side of the wall and sighs. He wants to do something, but he doesn’t know what. Grief is not something Chris has had much experience with, and Wyatt’s grief is stronger than anything he has ever seen. It has swallowed up his brother, overtaken him with such force. Chris’ only foray with grief had been when his best friend died in a car crash. He remembers holding her hand in the hospital, and sitting through the funeral; but more than that he remembers Wyatt’s quiet strength. Wyatt had stayed beside him the entire time, holding him while he cried, and comforting him when he could not. He thinks of Wyatt climbing into his bed and kissing his forehead when he couldn’t sleep; strong arms encircling him.
Chris’ face flushes with shame as he recalls this. His brother had been there for him, but what has Chris done for Wyatt?
Chris slips out of his bed and creeps to Wyatt’s room. A spell had repaired the damage Wyatt had inflicted on it, and so Chris sees that it is as clean and orderly as usual when he pushes the door open. Wyatt stares at him from his place on the bed, but he does not ask Chris why he is there. So Chris says nothing, he just climbs into bed with Wyatt. “I’m sorry Wy,” he whispers, laying his head on his brother’s chest. He loops his arm across Wyatt and rubs his arm. Wyatt stiffens and then relaxes into the touch. Chris tries to mirror what Wyatt had done for him, tries to think like his brother as Wyatt begins to shake. He leans forward, and plants a kiss in Wyatt’s hair. Wyatt clings to him, and cries himself to sleep.
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Chris wakes up stiff and sore, Wyatt lying on his arm. He props himself up with his other arm, trying to decide if he can roll Wyatt off without waking him. But then he catches sight of the peaceful expression on the older boy’s face and decides to do nothing. He rests his head on Wyatt’s shoulder and closes his eyes, listening to Wyatt’s soft breaths. He tightens his hold on Wyatt.
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When Chris wakes again, Wyatt is standing by the window, looking outside. Chris rolls towards him, surveying him. There’s something about his posture and his stance that’s just so Wyatt, that Chris finds himself sighing in relief. When his brother turns to him, he can still see grief in the corners of his eyes, but it is no longer crushing him.
“It happened so fast,” Wyatt says. Chris sits up straighter, amazed that his brother’s silence is suddenly breaking. “One minute we were alone and the next… we were surrounded. Brad just took off… he just ran off on us. I looked for Nick… I just wanted to orb us both out of there, but he was already far away from me… he wanted to stay and fight. By the time I… I turned away for one second, and when I looked back he was on the ground. There was… there was this huge hole in his chest and blood everywhere and I knew… I knew he was already dead, but I tried to heal him anyway. And it didn’t work.” Tears fall down Wyatt’s face and he swipes at them. “I really tried.”
“It wasn’t your fault…” Chris says awkwardly. He repeats the line again, adding more conviction. Even if Wyatt can’t believe him, Chris knows it’s true. “You can’t save everybody.”
“I know,” Wyatt mutters. “I know. Nick was always reckless, no one could stop him when he wanted to do something.”
Chris reaches out to him, grabs his hand like Lena did at the wake. Wyatt suddenly pulls his hand away and instead embraces Chris tightly. “It could have been you, Chris, it could have been you,” Wyatt whispers, and Chris isn’t even sure that he meant to say it out loud. Is this what has really been eating up his brother? “I don’t know what I would have done if it was you.”
“It wasn’t,” Chris says. “It wasn’t and it won’t ever be. I believe in you, Wyatt, I believe in you.” Chris makes his promises over and over and Wyatt cries. Chris hopes that these are promises he can keep. When Wyatt finally releases him, he seems much calmer, more at peace than he has been in days. Chris smiles and stares up at Wyatt. The older boy is once again larger than life, once again the heroic older brother who can do anything. And Chris hopes that he stays that way forever.