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I'm applying to this young writer's convention/retreat/thing, and you have to send in a one-page writing sample with your paperwork. Somehow my mother managed to wheedle her way into making me let her read my submission before I sent it off. Now my self-esteem is way down because, as usual, she ripped it to shreds. There wasn't any, like, "I'm
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I understand what you're saying, and your mum is correct in her criticism, BUT you're prepared to stand/fall on your own mistakes. You're adept enough to see actual flaws and know how to fix them. This means you have a MORE professional attitude than your mum.
The thing is, you're more capable of defending your work without being precious about it than your mum thinks you are. She wouldn't be doing it if she didn't expect a bit of a fight. You can take her suggestions on board, but it's better if you say before that this is a primary draft. You ARE aware of the faults in it thankyouverymuch. And if she doesn't like being intercepted with a 'yeah, I know' every fault she finds, she can either wait to read a later draft or keep her beak out.
Y'see, here's the thing, your mum is cold about this 'cause it's her job. She thinks she's mentally preparing you for the chilly, objective eyes of literary critics and editors. She's not. She's just failing as a supportive parent, 'cause she can't take her business hat off. And she's sticking her beak into everything you do 'cause it's her way of 'being there'. But she can't soften her critique up a bit, tell you she's proud, and sugar the faults pill, 'cause that's not how she behaves at work and she can't or won't separate you: daughter from writing: work. It's awful, but you won't get her respect until you have a Pulitzer or have exceeded ALL of her career achievements.
I'm glad you're still going for the seminar and sod it, you have 10 days to thump a few spelling mistakes. :)
As for That Guy. I've run into one of those and trust me, it's got fuck all to do with low self-esteem. Sociopaths are just that. It's not the negative traits of your nature they take advantage of - it's the positive traits. You value yourself. If you didn't we wouldn't be having another conversation about why your mum can't see she's shaving a cent or two off your self-worth pricetag. This guy wouldn't've got CLOSE if you weren't a caring soul who's conscious of others and respectful of their needs. So, fuck the low self-esteem argument. It was never a 'relationship' (that's going to be a tough habit to kick. 15 years later and I still refer to my abuser as 'The Psycho Ex'). If you weren't great, he wouldn've got his foot in the door.
And any more reaching for Joy Division if you're in a less that cheerful, butterflies, kittens and rainbows I'll be in here with the Jesus and Mary Chain! (Don't make me reach for the Sisters of Mercy and AC/DC! :O)
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