This is excellent, absolutely masterful. I'm in a bit a rush atm, so I will comment properly later, because I want to go back and read Gene's view of things again before commenting. IIRC you've done a cracking job of describing the same physical actions and expressions in a very similar way, but it's the pov that makes all the difference in the world.
This fic proves to me that it's Gene I love most, because having read both sides, my heart breaks for Gene who is desperate for love and thinks this is the only way Sam will accept him, whereas Sam just strikes me as being over-keen to submit and not take any responsibility for matters. Totally unfair, I know, especially after only one reading, so I'll read both sides again later and then comment properly.
Just thought, something I do recall from Gene's pov was that it was impossible to know what Sam was thinking, hence this idea. Whereas in this one, Sam is reading all sorts of things into Gene's expressions and actions.
Wow, thank you. I'm kind of at a loss as for what to say in the face of such a complementary comment. I guess, just thanks again, I suppose, and glad you found it a good read.
I'll cut Sam a bit of slack here, because he sees Gene's actions as just another way for his subconscious to punish, and he's never really fought against previous ones, like the TCG, because he was too scared of them. But i'll agree that he needs to grow some backbone and try to take matters into his own hands.
And the POV thing, about how Sam reads more into Gene's action than is done in the opposite situation, was intentional. I just thought Sam, being the more over-analytical of the two, would want to try and make sense in his head of Gene's motivations, whereas Gene thinks that he knows. If that made any sense :P
And I thought Gene's POV was depressing. This was fantastic! I loved how Gene thought he was doing this because it's what Sam wants, and how you reveal Sam is doing this because he thinks it's the only way he can get Gene.
These boys are so good at miscommunication, and you've captured that on the darkest, most wonderful level. Sam crying in the shower stole my angsty heart.
Yeah, when I do depressing, it's dark and miserable depressing. And they are experts at miscommunication, it's a surprise they ever communicate anything successfully at all.
And I'm particularly glad you liked the shower bit, because that was probably the hardest bit to write, describing Sam letting go of the mask he puts on when Gene comes over and completely breaking down, particularly when I tend to write from Gene's POV.
This was very, very haunting in so many ways. The dynamic between Sam and Gene that you've captured is just perfect, and the way that Sam's insecurities and sense of propriety stand in the way of the relationship, and of communication with Gene, is brilliantly done.
Gene was almost frightening in this piece, and I love the way that you've managed to make me love him even when he is frightening - he's trying so hard to be something that he thinks he should be, and to turn the relationship into something that he can fathom, and Sam is doing the same, and it's just blowing up in their faces...
Thanks! I'm glad you enjoyed it :) And I don't think it's stupid to squee over comments, particularly when the comments to stories in this comm are so thought-provoking.
I'm glad you think I wrote the Sam-Gene dynamic accurately because when I write this dark, I always worry that I lose that too much, because while they both separately have been to very dark places emotionally, their relationship, whil antagonistic, was in a way a relief from their respective darkness.
Also, it's good that Gene came across as frightening, because I would've been doing something wrong if he didn't in this sort of situation.
And I'm just basically happy that you enjoyed the fic so much. Thanks for reading :)
Reading this at work so sorry for the quick comment but throught this was excellent again. Showing the situation from both perspectives gives it great depth and makes it even more painful to experience. That is a good thing, she hastily adds. Am left feeling very sorry for both the boys and hoping that they would be able to sort themselves out but you seem to have showed them trapped in a cycle that is hard to escape from. Really good.
Thanks. I had to do both perspectives, because if it was just Gene's perspective by itself, it would've felt more incomplete plus I'm evil and like to depress people, muahahaha! - Who wrote that?
And hopefully, if a planned sequel goes according to plan, then perhaps the cycle may be broken, so don't give up hope (then again my happy endings tend to be somewhat weak in the happy part).
OK, so now I'm sat here like a right mopey bint but I think this was brilliantly done. A really nice explanation of why Sam doesn't fight it even though he doesn't want it. It's not just a case of wanting Gene -- that wouldn't explain it enough, that might involve trying to change what Gene is doing -- but the part of him that sees Gene as the "evolution," if you will, of the TCG is just a great idea. It is heart wrenching because we already know how Gene really feels and you have these lovely little flashes in here of more "tender" feelings about Gene that Sam can't admit to because of what's happening.
So that said, is it OK to say that I'd really like to see a third story to this? Perhaps Gene comes back for some reason, dropped his car keys or something and gets to see the after effect. It doesn't even have to have a happy ending -- Drayce beats down inner squeeing fan girl who just started screaming as I typed that she *wants* a happy ending -- but I think it would be fascinating to see what would happen if they both realize the
( ... )
I'll second the call for a part 3 where the truth comes out, and my preference would be for the happy ending!
That said, I agree that these two parts stand as an exemplary piece of work without a third part, and I speak as someone who normally gets pretty annoyed and upset at really angsty endings.
Aha! But you and Andy bunnied her for the neck deep angstyness to begin with. Methinks it might have had a happier outcome without the two of you warping Acid's poor little innocent mind... OK, well, warping her further.
Although I'm really glad you two evil wenches did bunny her as these two stories together really are brilliant ♥
And of course we WANT the happy ending... But the part of me that has remained 6 years old and wants a story with a beginning, middle and end is just looking for some resolution, even IF it is angsty... Look at my icon though -- do you really want to make Hugh cry more, Acid? Hmmm? *bats eyelashes*
Well, it wasn't really a question of deliberate bunnying, it just intrigued me that m31andy and I both saw that darkness as being what was really happening behind poor Gene's tragic misunderstanding. And I don't normally do angst as such, because I tend to see it as gratuitous unpleasantness in most cases! In this one it was the potential for a terrifying difference in the points of view that came over so strongly in the way acidpenguin had written Gene's part that - unusually for me - struck me as an interesting exercise in use of pov. And of course a very human study of two wonderful characters. /pseud blathering.
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This fic proves to me that it's Gene I love most, because having read both sides, my heart breaks for Gene who is desperate for love and thinks this is the only way Sam will accept him, whereas Sam just strikes me as being over-keen to submit and not take any responsibility for matters. Totally unfair, I know, especially after only one reading, so I'll read both sides again later and then comment properly.
Just thought, something I do recall from Gene's pov was that it was impossible to know what Sam was thinking, hence this idea. Whereas in this one, Sam is reading all sorts of things into Gene's expressions and actions.
I'll stop rambling now and come back later.
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I'll cut Sam a bit of slack here, because he sees Gene's actions as just another way for his subconscious to punish, and he's never really fought against previous ones, like the TCG, because he was too scared of them. But
i'll agree that he needs to grow some backbone and try to take matters into his own hands.
And the POV thing, about how Sam reads more into Gene's action than is done in the opposite situation, was intentional. I just thought Sam, being the more over-analytical of the two, would want to try and make sense in his head of Gene's motivations, whereas Gene thinks that he knows. If that made any sense :P
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These boys are so good at miscommunication, and you've captured that on the darkest, most wonderful level. Sam crying in the shower stole my angsty heart.
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And I'm particularly glad you liked the shower bit, because that was probably the hardest bit to write, describing Sam letting go of the mask he puts on when Gene comes over and completely breaking down, particularly when I tend to write from Gene's POV.
Thanks for reading, I'm glad you liked it.
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Gene was almost frightening in this piece, and I love the way that you've managed to make me love him even when he is frightening - he's trying so hard to be something that he thinks he should be, and to turn the relationship into something that he can fathom, and Sam is doing the same, and it's just blowing up in their faces...
Great fic!
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Is it stupid to squee over comments?
(loved the fic too, by the way)
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Also, it's good that Gene came across as frightening, because I would've been doing something wrong if he didn't in this sort of situation.
And I'm just basically happy that you enjoyed the fic so much. Thanks for reading :)
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And hopefully, if a planned sequel goes according to plan, then perhaps the cycle may be broken, so don't give up hope (then again my happy endings tend to be somewhat weak in the happy part).
Thanks for reading, and I'm glad you liked it.
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So that said, is it OK to say that I'd really like to see a third story to this? Perhaps Gene comes back for some reason, dropped his car keys or something and gets to see the after effect. It doesn't even have to have a happy ending -- Drayce beats down inner squeeing fan girl who just started screaming as I typed that she *wants* a happy ending -- but I think it would be fascinating to see what would happen if they both realize the ( ... )
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That said, I agree that these two parts stand as an exemplary piece of work without a third part, and I speak as someone who normally gets pretty annoyed and upset at really angsty endings.
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Although I'm really glad you two evil wenches did bunny her as these two stories together really are brilliant ♥
And of course we WANT the happy ending... But the part of me that has remained 6 years old and wants a story with a beginning, middle and end is just looking for some resolution, even IF it is angsty... Look at my icon though -- do you really want to make Hugh cry more, Acid? Hmmm? *bats eyelashes*
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