Aug 06, 2005 02:39
So here I sit, it's something like 3 AM and of course I can't sleep because I didn't get to bed until something like 5 AM yesterday. whoops. No one is really online to pester since the G went home tonight I believe, so I decided to pop open ye olde LJ and start hitting buttons randomly until I ran out of stuff to say.
I was sitting at my desk today shuffling up some playing cards to break in the deck for some tricks, and looking around my desk I realized something about myself. I am a supreme hobby whore. Looking at it in the gestault, I'm amazed at all of the quirky hobbies I've picked up over the years and the people that I picked them up from. I guess I never really thought about how much people have left their influence on me. Kind of strange, I always figured myself as pursueing my own interests and being simply me, but the more I think about it, most of my interests became my interests because of other people. Or perhaps it is precisely the combination of all these things together that makes each of us unique? Anyway, from where I sat, I could see at least a remnant of at least one of my hobbies, and for those interested, here goes...Obviously the deck of cards I am shuffling for some magic tricks (hobby courtesy of Rob M.), a stack of MtG cards (Arthur), the scarf I've been crocheting on and off for ages (Jama), source prints for a game I've been programming (Pat S.), a half finished woven bracelet of silver and gold fill wire (Annie), dice for gaming (Bill), models I've built (Daniel), my chalk bag for rock climbing (Spot), some anime DVDs (Jonathan), my Go board (Mike), and random recipe cards (Lindsey). Like I said, I'm a total hobby whore, heh. anyways, I found that fairly enlightening, If you're reading this, I challenge you to think about your interests and how those came about, perhaps you'll be equally perplexed ;)
Back to reality for a bit...I got my stitches out earlier today, so I am back to normal...or whatever it is that passes for normal with me. Having my wisdom teeth out wasn't nearly the horrible experience that everyone described to me, really the biggest annoyance was some aching and the lack of solid food for a while. That being said, I'm really glad that's over with.
So it's just over a week now until I get back to UD, and I can't wait! As Alex said, he and Chris will be there on the 13th and I'll be in on the 14th. I am really looking forward to seeing everyone again. You know, for such a painfully long summer, this one went by really fast, I remember thinking I would never get through it at the start. I dunno, something about this summer made it feel like it went by really fast, anyone else get that?
I got to talk to Jonathan today for the first time in a few months now. Most of the people reading this won't know who he is, but he was one of my best friends from high school who joined the marines afterwards and is also one of the people I can blame for getting me into anime. We caught up on a lot of things. He's stationed in Okinawa right now, and before that he was in Thailand doing humanitarian aid after the tsunami. it's kind of weird to think I haven't actually seen him in well over 2 years now. He's changed a lot. Then again, so have I.
Thinking back to High School, I really am amazed at who I was back then and who I am now. Hmm, most of you who do read this probably don't know this, but back in high school I was a pretty shy introverted person. Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying I was a total social reject, but I always had kind of a shell back then. I would always hold back wondering what people would think if I actually spoke my mind. Kind of weird to even think about now, given my current penchant for saying things without worrying what about what my friends will think, or about political correctness in general.
Anyway, once more back to reality. I just got done booking my Greyhound Tickets from Dayton to Indy and back for GenCon. It's pretty much set in stone now, I'm going for sure. I just need Scott and/or Alan to get back to me about how the hotel check in and badge pick up is going to work. I plan to have a total blast there, but it's a real pity that I couldn't con anybody from UD into going (Darn you G). Scott has sent me my work hours ...They...leave a bit to be desired, but here goes...
Arrive Thursday Night
Friday: 3PM-3AM
Saturday: 8PM-8AM
Sunday 8:30 AM - 8:30 PM
Leave for UD again in the wee hours of monday
Did you catch that? That's right, there is only half an hour of sleep built into that schedule between my saturday and sunday shifts. Oh well, it's GenCon, I shouldn't be sleeping anyway ;) It really is a pity, though, that I'm going to miss a lot of people moving in between the 18th and 21st. And I'm going to miss my house's own "Welcome back" party, how ironic is that? It seems like UD schedules the academic year around making conventions of any kind inconvenient to attend.
So anyway, where is my head at right now you might ask? That's a pretty good question ;) I've actually been pretty mellowed out in the past week or so (or perhaps that was just because of the painkillers from the wisdom teeth thing). Despite my previous feelings about it, the counselor I've been seeing has really given me some great insight about a lot of things. There are a lot of things that go one in ones life, and I'm realizing that there are just some things that are far beyond my power to control. C'est la vie, blaming and self-doubt won't do anything healthy. So with this new revelation in tow, it feels like there's been a pretty solid weight lifted off of me. So what does all this stuff mean? Am I trying to say I'm happy? No...There's far too much still going on behind the scenes right now for me to really claim that. Does that mean I'm down and depressed? Again, no, some things are beyond my control, just have to grin and bear that too. So what in the hell am I actually getting at? I suppose that the simple realization that there are some things I can't control and that there is no reason to blame myself for those things has actually given me back a measure of control in my own life. I am enjoying something right now that I can't say I've had in quite a long time. A serene state of mind. For the first time in a while I feel like I've got a pretty good handle on things. And to that end, I'm content.
Wow, looking back on this post, that was a really weird mix of a real life update with a lot of in-my-head psychobabble. I guess I've just been awake too long. Later days friends, take care.
Carthago delenda est,
Justin