this is a day late..
well i guess i am a little late...i wanted to update yesterday but didnt get around to it..its been 6 months and 1 day..its crazy..i cant write much about it or read much about it cause its too hard..my real dad thinks im a baby cause im not over it yet..cause i still cry about it..well fuck him and anybody else who thinks that..my mother and miss buddington think i need to go to a grief therapist. i dunno bout that..its just that if im not with people, its ALL i think about. i get angry,sad,and angry again..i don't get happy when i think about the good times..that just doesnt work for me..i hate being alone...i go out to his memorial as much as i can. i always think that ill just man up and handle it, but i never seem too. i always break down..ive gone out there in the middle of the night and just sat there on that bench for an hour, alone..i feel like im crazy cause i just sit there and talk like he's right next to me. but i know hes not, and i can never change that.. thats what the hard part is for me. i dont think ill ever be "over it"