BAI NOW!

[acalculatedname]

It appears that my time in Exhibit B is over-- and much later than I ever expected. Gotta say that I was greatly surprised and, truly, honored to have made it into the final 8-ish; still hard to believe. My very sincere and humble thanks to everyone who made that possible at one point or another, for whatever reason they decided to do so (hopefully

Comments

[porn_this_way]

Well shit! A’ight, I feel like a total dick now. One hit wonder - ouch, was definitely not intending to exile you to such an unfortunate category! It’s more that you created something that shattered the mold in such a spectacular way, it set the friggen standard for that particular genre (in this case, the classic “I don’t know what to write” post). It’s not a matter of one-hit-wonder, it’s a matter of you created a true classic that, two and a half seasons later, after countless good posts by countless good writers, is not only still memorable, but still stands out as *the* gold standard, and has truly earned its place among the ranks of immortal posts.

I also feel the need to say that I’ve only been around since Season 8, so any shenanigans you may have perpetrated before then were also before my time - and, being unaware of their existence, I'm not really in any position to comment on them. mc-lji died way too soon (though the premise was brilliant, and the few entries he put up before his untimely demise were hilarious, not remotely an epic fail!), and dammit, when you linked to your old journal that had that rap battle post in it, it threw a server error when I tried to check it out! Shenanigans indeed.

I promise, with all my heart, to only use my skills for evil, but I still shake my fist at you for flying the coop!

[acalculatedname]

Those are some strong words, which that entry probably does not deserve. Basically, I had an "I don't know what to write" moment on my hands... but those types of moments tend to lead to immediate LJI dismissal,* and I wasn't ready to go yet, so I did what comes naturally: bullshitting.

I really AM glad you see it as more than that, though, really. Just part of the ongoing lesson - as in art (and I would DEFINITELY stop short of calling my LJI entries "art"), it's just hard to know what part of your output will really resonate with someone. :)

Yeah, I forgot that rap-battle track was no longer hosted (Soop had a friend providing that hosting back then to protect all three parties' anonymity). I still have it... I'll try to remember to repost it for your "enjoyment." It would have been one of the better tracks in mc_lji's oeuvre, if mc_lji had existed then.

* I suspect that part of the reason why I was tossed out this round was that folks may have confused my last entry with an "I don't know what to write" moment. It wasn't at all - it was actually one of my more arduous and careful entries, especially this season. Of course, the aborted W14 results also indicated that it was Just My Time To Go anyway - and I wrote that last job accordingly, knowing it would probably be my last. People could have responded to *that* too - I've also learned that when you write something with strong hints of "I think I'm gonna die," the voters happily decide to help you along. :)

[porn_this_way]

Pffft, that entry totally deserves those words, because I said so, and that's that :P

I don't think your entry from last week sounded like an "I don't know what to write" deal at all. It was written in a fairly scattershot style, sure, but the style was deliberate (or at least seemed so!) and was a perfect match to the tone and nature of the entry, so...?

IDK, dude. There are some weeks where I've been looking at the vote, just sitting there scratching my head and being all like "GO HOME, POLL. YOU'RE DRUNK." I also think LJI has turned primarily into a fiction writing contest, which is kind of tragic. Not that I have *anything* against well-written fiction. Hell, some of my fave contestants have posted primarily fiction. But when the competition so heavily favors one specific genre or style of post that anyone who doesn't write in that style seems to be at a disadvantage, that kinda blows.

[acalculatedname]

OK, so let me kind of explain what went down to make it easy on you: I had been asked to help helm the aforementioned all-LJI-snark-all-the-time account, srs_bidness, and I had written two entries kinda halfassed, not really caring all that much / doing it mostly as a favor of sorts to Soop. It was still only about 5 weeks into the season.

Then this S5 LJI participant foolonthehill (that was / seemingly is her account name - I dare not link her with "lj user") posted the dreaded "IDK what to write LOL so uh here's a Youtube video of me singing a Beatles song ("Good Day Sunshine") against the Beatles' recording." No, I'm not joking at all - that was seriously the entirety of her entry.

Now, this part will sound familiar: foolonthehill had well over 500 LJ friends as her personal vote-army, and I can't remember if she won the tribe vote that week with that shit, or if she just managed to beat me soundly in the tribal vote. One of the two.

I actually took the round "defeat" really kinda fucking personally. I mean, my entry had actually been a written entry with some damn care and brains involved, FFS... and also had something (however almost-as-tenuous) to do with the damn prompt. And some complete idiot singing over a Beatles CD for two minutes wins the vote? I mean, Christ, she couldn't even sing.

This was a reinforcement of my belief that LJI was not at all about merit / inherently flawed / "had to be destroyed," and from that point until my eventual eSuicide, I took on my snark-mission with incredibly, visibly renewed fervor and viciousness.

For that first "post-rebirth" entry, I did what anyone would do: wrote a quasi-Socratic meta-entry (note: NOT required reading) about my anger with a fake Karl Rove campaign-manager figure, made a hip-hop beat using nothing but a handful of appropriate Beatles samples (FOTH sure did like the Beatles and that made her VERY UNIQUE!), and threw down what as far as I know was LJI's first and last hip-hop diss track aimed at one particular participant.

Here's the MP3 (dirty / NSFW version), and here are the lyrics. Not my best beat ever, but I had to work in all those damn Beatles songs (including "Fool on the Hill", obvs, and "Good Day Sunshine").

She dropped out of LJI a few weeks later, probably because she didn't give much of a shit in the first place; the evidence suggested that she'd never even NOTICED my "challenge." Awkward.

I think in general you would appreciate srs_bidness, no matter who was writing for him (mostly me in S5, entirely Soop in S4). It's now a little crazy going back through his stuff and trying to figure out what the fuck is going on sometimes, because it's all kinda dated-inside-meta (although there are STILL a few referenced Season 4 / 5-era players hanging around!), but... yeah, he made a weekly point of doing EXACTLY the sort of thing you seem to do so very well every 3-5 entries. :)

HUGS, PORNY. HUGS.

[porn_this_way]

You did NOT just call me "porny"!! I'd so kick your ass for that if I weren't too busy laughing my ass off at that rap track.

Although I have gotten into a grudge match with another contestant that resulted in a quick volley of "fuck you, man! No, fuck YOU!" entries targeting each other, there was no musical component at all or anything that compares to this magnitude. Your retort to bad Beatles karaoke was absolute perfection, and it's more than a little tragic that your challenge was never answered. ("This part will sound familiar" indeed. The more things change...oy!)

I definitely think I would have appreciated a lot of the srs_bidness shenanigans. Yet one more reason to take myself out into the parking lot and kick my own ass for not leaping into Idol ages before I did! However, there's a pretty good chance I'm gonna go look through some old srs_bidness shenanigans next time I'm...er...partaking of various herbs and potions while enjoying a quiet evening at home.