Perception of Reality
Perception of Reality by Camden
He’s sick of it. Completely, totally, utterly sick. Spike is driving him completely insane. He can’t even hang out in his own basement anymore, because Spike is always there. He never has anything to do, so he just sits around making inappropriate comments all day long. Lately, he’s started making remarks of a… sexual nature. And the bitch of it is that it’s making Xander hot.
A month ago, he never would have considered Spike that way. Hello, evil! Not that he’s never thought about guys. Although he’d never own up to it, even under torture. They could stick flaming bamboo under his fingernails, and he’d still never admit anything. Especially not the fact that Spike’s little innuendoes have started getting to him.
As he opens the door to the basement, he automatically looks around for Spike. Seeing that he’s alone, he walks over and pulls out the sofa bed. It’s late, and he has no intention of doing anything but going to sleep. He shucks off his uniform and sits on the edge of the bed to pull off his socks. Dressed only in boxers, he slides under the blanket and listens to the silence.
Inevitably, he starts thinking about Spike. Earlier, before he’d left, Spike had been messing with him again. Making snide comments about Anya, and how Xander could do better. Someone else could better serve his “special” needs, Spike had said. He’d said that Anya isn’t really Xander’s “type” at all.
Xander thinks about this. More and more he’s becoming convinced that Anya isn’t his type. He’s starting to suspect that his type has a penis. And a sexy black coat. And a slight sun allergy.
Groaning, he flings his arm over his face. Damn Spike. He might have been able to ignore these little niggling doubts about his preferences if Spike hadn’t started screwing with him. He quickly realizes that thinking about Spike and screwing together is rapidly making him hard.
He wonders how much time he has before Spike gets back from wherever he is. He figures that it’s enough, and he reaches into his boxers and wraps his hand around his dick. It’s extremely hard, and his hand feels good. He begins to stroke. And fantasize.
Forbidden images begin to spin through his fevered mind. Spike naked. Xander on his knees in front of naked Spike. Spike’s hands on his head, encouraging him onward. He groans and begins to stroke harder. He imagines bending over, while Spike’s talented tongue works over his asshole and down to his balls.
He’s panting hard now. He grabs his t-shirt and shoots his load into it. He lies back, breathing hard, letting the t-shirt fall over the side of the bed. He rolls onto his side, ready to go to sleep, when he hears a voice.
“Why, Xander. That was very entertaining.” Suddenly, Spike is standing beside the bed, wearing back jeans and a black t-shirt. His feet are bare. He obviously didn’t just come from outside.
Xander’s heart begins to pound. He sits up, blinking, as if Spike might be an illusion. “When the hell did you get here?”
“Been here the whole time. Was sittin’ on the steps over there behind your classy little bead curtain.”
“Why the hell were you hiding?”
“Wasn’t hiding. That’s where I like to sit and have a fag. But I got lucky tonight, didn’t I? Caught the whole show. I give it two thumbs up.” Spike puts both thumbs in the air, grinning like an idiot.
Xander can feel the heat in his face, and he’s sure he’s as red as Willow used to get during class presentations. “Shut up, asshole. Men have needs. Get over it. You could’ve said something instead of listening to me like some kind of pervert.” He points at Spike accusingly. “That’s it! You’re a big perv. A voyeur!”
“A voyeur? Me? I was an innocent bystander. You’re the one who gets off on wanking in front of other people. I’m not the one with the kink. You’re an exhibitionist.”
“I didn’t know you were there!” Xander fairly shrieks. “Spying on me, you weirdo.”
“Probably made it better for you. It’s not like I don’t know that you were thinking of me the whole time.”
Xander’s mouth drops open. He racks his brain, trying to think if he could have moaned Spike’s name or something else damning.
“Ha! I knew it! What were you thinking about doing to me?” He walks closer. He spreads his hand over his fly in a way that makes Xander a little nervous. Spike runs his tongue along the edge of his teeth, looking a little predatory. And a little sensuous, too. “Were you thinking about my cock, hmm? Pretending it was mine you were stroking?” He runs his hand down the front of his jeans, caressing himself. His pants are tight enough that Xander can see that he’s hard.
The idea that Spike is getting off on this is at once terrifying and highly arousing. Xander’s caught in the brink between wanting to run away and wanting to jump Spike’s bones. He’s also pretty sure that he knows which option he wants more. It’s hard to take the first step. And it’s not just the orientation thing. It’s the vampire thing. The Spike thing.
Spike is someone that Xander has feared and envied. Hated and lusted after. Wanted to kill and wanted to fuck. All of those things in fairly equal amounts since their first meeting. Spike is dangerous. Not just the fangs, either. But he’s not sure that he cares anymore.
As Xander’s mind is churning away, Spike moves his finger - just one finger - and pops the first button on his jeans. Xander can feel a trickle of sweat run down between his shoulder blades. Another crook of Spike’s finger and another button is free. Spike runs his hand up his stomach, skimming the t-shirt along with his hand. He’s showing off.
Xander doesn’t care, though. He drinks in the perfectly sculpted muscles of Spike’s stomach, and the line of whiskey-dark hair running down past that second open button. Xander realizes what Spike is doing. He’s pushing. Waiting to see how far he can go before Xander calls this whole thing off. He could do that. He could tell Spike to go away and leave him alone.
But he’s already basically admitted to Spike that he was thinking about him while he jacked off. His cards are on the table. He decides to call Spike’s bluff. Worst case scenario, Spike will call him a poof and try to use this as ammo later. But on the other hand, this could be a revelation.
Xander hasn’t gotten enough good things in his life. A luckier man might not be willing to take the risk, but Xander is. He reaches out and hooks the next button of Spike’s jeans and pops it free. Spike inhales a little, and drops his shirt back down. He looks at Xander questioningly.
Xander smiles a little, and frees the next button. He pushes the jeans down and out of the way. Spike’s cock is right in front of him, and it’s rock-hard. Xander doesn’t even hesitate. He wraps his hand around it and squeezes.
“Oh fuck.” Spike moans a bit. “I didn’t think you’d really… Oh, god, just like that.”
There isn’t any going back, but Xander isn’t worried. He’s too busy to worry about later. He has several things on his to-do list. He glances up at Spike. He’s looking down at Xander, his eyes smoldering. Xander grins up at him. Just like in his fantasy, he slides off the bed and kneels down in front of Spike.
He licks up and down the length of Spike’s cock, and then opens his mouth to take him inside. Spike’s hands are in Xander’s hair now, guiding and caressing his head, but it’s nothing like Xander’s fantasy.
It’s a million times better.