(no subject)
I have to get up tomorrow early i have to, but i'm still not in bed, why? I don't know. i have to go out tomorrow i have to, but i hate going out, why? I don't know. I'll probably see them tomorrow, but it tears me up, why? I don't know.
I'm so fucked up lately, dunno why, it's like, i don't know what i want in life anymore at all, girls, sex, a relationship at all, ever! I complain that i haven't got what i used to want, and that he has, even though i don't want it anymore. I haven't done my coursework, i need to but i haven't i've decided i'm gonna work harder, but i haven't tried yet. I'm scared of failing, i don't know why, i wasn't even gonna return to sixth form.
If all goes well tomorrow i'm gonna start a new circle of friends, and start skateboarding again, i just need to replace a bearing.
I dunno how to feel about life, or about things, i guess i'm sick of people being happy when i never am. It's not that i'm particularly sad, but i'm not happy either.
People have what i don't or maybe i'm just feeling sorry for myself.
I doubt anyone will read this all, and i almost know no-one will take it in like i mean it to be took.
OH YEH AND THIS....MOST PEOPLE ARE MENTIONED SO READ
Really Long Survey (over 200)
Created by starsbleed2nite and taken 121984 times on Bzoink
What is your name?Stephen Edwin ChambersAre you named after anyone?Middle name was great great great....etc...grandads name.What's your screename?StarxhateWould you name a child of yours after you?God noIf you were born a member of the opposite sex what would your name be?Stephanie Marion ChambersIf you could switch names with a friend who would it be?If i HAD to? Curt cause he gets everything...Are there any mispronounciations/typos that ppl do w/ your name constantly?Stee/Steven/StephWould you drop your last name if you became famous?lol....noBasicsYour gender:MaleStraight/Gay/Bi:StraightSingle?YesIf not, do you want to be?Nice way to dump someone viat..quizBirthdate:15 October 1987Your age:17Age you act:7Age you wish you were:7Your height:*erm* 5' 9" ?Eye color:Green/YellowHappy with it?erm...i don't care reallyHair color:Brown/Black/RedHappy with it?NoLefty/righty/ambidextrous:RightyYour living arrangement:/w parents in a houseYour family:mums side only thanksHave any pets?2 dogs...but my dog died :(Whats your job?HAHA. qualified slackerPiercings?lip, had nose, but it suckedTattoos?wait till b-dayObsessions?D2X, Harry Potter, TeaAddictions?D2X, Tea, Cheese n ChipsDo you speak another language?French and a TEEENY bit of ChineseHave a favorite quote?Yes, ALL of Romeo and JulietDo you have a webpage?www.stephenchambers.tkDeep Thoughts About Life and You in itDo you live in the moment?I live in the past and for tomorrowDo you consider yourself tolerant of others?noDo you have any secrets?noDo you hate yourself?no i hate most othersDo you like your handwriting?noDo you have any bad habits?Not tidying roomWhat is the compliment you get from most people?That was amazing......(backflips) lol...If a movie was made about your life, what would it be called?How NOT to liveWhat's your biggest fear?Dying LonelyCan you sing?I think soDo you ever pretend to be someone else just to look cool?Johnny DeppAre you a loner?yesWhat are your #1 priorities in life?FunIf you were another person, would you be friends with you?NoAre you a daredevil?YesIs there anything you fear or hate about yourself?Hate is a strong word.Are you passive or agressive?Neither....Do you have a journal?...i woulda thought you'd notice....being on it and allWhat is your greatest strength and weakness?Strength=Trying Again \ Weakness=It never worksIf you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?No more spots EVERDo you think you are emotionally strong?lol noIs there anything you regret doing/not doing in life?Yes. i regret losing my virginity, i regret not kissing emDo you think life has been good so far?Upto the August last year, it couldnt have been betterWhat is the most important lesson you've learned from life?You can't win them allWhat do you like the most about your body?stomachAnd least?shouldersDo you think you are good looking?...at timesAre you confident?NO!What is the fictional character you are most like?Captain Jack SparrowAre you perceived wrongly?yes everydayDo You...Smoke?noDo drugs?noRead the newspaper?noPray?noGo to church?noTalk to strangers who IM you?yesSleep with stuffed animals?noTake walks in the rain?yesTalk to people even though you hate them?i have to reallyDrive?noLike to drive fast?noWould or Have You Ever?Liked your voice?yesHurt yourself?falling over yesBeen out of the country?noEaten something that made other people sick?marmiteBeen in love?I'd say so, but then again, i'd say no alsoDone drugs?yesGone skinny dipping?erm...not that i remember, that being said, tim had alcohol and a poolHad a medical emergency?yes x3Had surgery?yes x2Ran away from home?yesPlayed strip poker?noGotten beaten up?yesBeaten someone up?noBeen picked on?yesBeen on stage?loadsa timesSlept outdoors?yupThought about suicide?yes =(Pulled an all nighter?yup think i am tonight aswell XDIf yes, what is your record?4 daysGone one day without food?NOTalked on the phone all night?yesSlept together with the opposite sex w/o actually having sex?yesSlept all day?yesKilled someone?Emotionally Probably, Physically NoMade out with a stranger?lol yes, Rise Against GigHad sex with a stranger?NoThought you're going crazy?everydayKissed the same sex?....yes *shakes head in dissaproval*Done anything sexual with the same sex?NoBeen betrayed?Yes....so harshHad a dream that came true?A few...wierd thatBroken the law?YesMet a famous person?YesHave you ever killed an animal by accident?YesOn purpose?YesTold a secret you swore you wouldn't tell?YesStolen anything?NoBeen on radio/tv?YesBeen in a mosh-pit?lmao stupid question...at least once a weekHad a nervous breakdown?Dunno it sounds more serious than i've ever bee, i've broke down i guessBungee jumped?No...why have i started with caps all of a suddenHad a dream that kept coming back?YesBeliefsBelive in life on other planets?yepMiracles?noAstrology?kindaMagic?i wish but noGod?noSatan?noSanta?noGhosts?yep but not dead people...hyperactive imagination deficienciesLuck?yep bad and goodLove at first sight?no..attraction at first sightYin and yang (that good cant exist w/o bad)?too trueWitches?lol claire....noEaster bunny?noBelieve its possible to remain faithful forever?erm,..yeh if its rightBelieve theres a pot of gold at the end of a rainbow?noDo you wish on stars?i have done beforeDeep Theological QuestionsDo you believe in the traditional view of Heaven and Hell?noDo you think God has a gender?i dont believe in god, if there is a higher being, i wouldnt personify itDo you believe in organized religion?no, its a means of controlWhere do you think we go when we die?You ever read HDM?FriendsDo you have any gay/lesbian friends?probablyWho is your best friend?James Timothy AhernWho's the one person that knows most about you?Emily Rose BransonWhat's the best advice that anyone has ever given to you?Just Keep Skating - Tony GaleYour favourite inside joke?lol HebrewsThing you're picked on most about?Being alternativeWho's your longest known friend?Timothy Ride/ Georgina YatesNewest?Laura SimsShyest?Curt WalkerFunniest?John MatthewsSweetest?Louisa LawsonClosest?Emily Rose Brason (lol full names rock)Weirdest?Greg.....wtf is your last name gregSmartest?Emily Rose BransonDitziest?ChloeFriends you miss being close to the most?James Ahern / Emily Rose Branson / Curt WalkerLast person you talked to online?Darkyin DavidWho do you talk to most online?Curt usuallyWho are you on the phone with most?CurtWho do you trust most?Jason GormanWho listens to your problems?Jason, James, JohnWho do you fight most with?CurtWho's the nicest?LouisaWho's the most outgoing?James AhernWho's the best singer?lol....fuck....Jason cause he dares toWho's on your shit-list?No oneHave you ever thought of having sex with a friend?YepWho's your second family?The WalkersDo you always feel understood?Hardly everWho's the loudest friend?James AhernDo you trust others easily?YesWho's house were you last at?CurtsName one person who's arms you feel safe in:....this is too obvious ERBDo your friends know you?a few doFriend that lives farthest away:James AhernLove and All ThatDo you consider love a mistake?No, i consider infactuation a mistakeWhat do you find romantic?Kissing of the neck, Kissing in the rain, the right words at the tight timeTurn-on?Suspenders, Asian chicks, the crawlTurn-off?bad dress senseFirst kiss?kiss=year 3 with kirsten [lost contact] made out= last yearIf someone u had no interest in had interest in dating u how would u feel?i'd tell them. how would i feel? i wouldn't care tbhDo you prefer knowing someone before dating them or goingyesHave u ever wished it was more socially acceptable 4 a girl 2 ask a guy outYES!Have you ever been romantically attracted to someone physically unattractivyupDo you think the opposite sex finds you good looking?no, they find me as a shoulder to cry onWhat is best about the opposite sex?the way their figure goes in at the sideWhat is the worst thing about the opposite sex?missing themWhat's the last present someone gave you?Inflatable Wacken Guitar-my sisterAre you in love?NoDo you consider your significant other hot?I dont have one, if i did, i would yesWho Was the Last Person...That haunted you?EmYou wanted to kill?AaronThat you laughed at?JamesThat laughed at you?TimThat turned you on?LauraYou went shopping with?LMAO...lisaThat broke your heart?EmTo disappoint you?CurtTo ask you out?I've never been asked outTo make you cry?EmTo brighten up your day?JamesThat you thought about?GeorginaYou saw a movie with?JamesYou talked to on the phone?LouisaYou talked to through IM/ICQ?Dont use em foo!You saw?JamesYou lost?EmRight This Moment...Are you going out?was gonna go out, but fags didnt text me backWill it be with your significant other?FFS I DONT HAVE ONE YOU IDIOTOr some random person?erm, yeh everyones randomWhat are you wearing right now?boxers and glassesBody part you're touching right now:.....my elbow is touching my side.....does that turn you on?!What are you worried about right now?Failing BusinessWhat book are you reading?Harry Potter POAWhat's on your mousepad?Its a desk...infra-red mouse and all tht.Use 5 words to describe how you're feeling:Emotional,Frail, Confused,Weak,AnnoyedAre you bored?Believe me if i wasnt i wouldnt be taking this testAre you tired?NopeAre you talking to anyone online?No ones onlineAre you talking to anyone on the phone?NopeAre you lonely or content?LonelyAre you listening to music?No...but thats a damn good idea
Create a Survey | Search Surveys | Go to Bzoink
I'm so fucked up lately, dunno why, it's like, i don't know what i want in life anymore at all, girls, sex, a relationship at all, ever! I complain that i haven't got what i used to want, and that he has, even though i don't want it anymore. I haven't done my coursework, i need to but i haven't i've decided i'm gonna work harder, but i haven't tried yet. I'm scared of failing, i don't know why, i wasn't even gonna return to sixth form.
If all goes well tomorrow i'm gonna start a new circle of friends, and start skateboarding again, i just need to replace a bearing.
I dunno how to feel about life, or about things, i guess i'm sick of people being happy when i never am. It's not that i'm particularly sad, but i'm not happy either.
People have what i don't or maybe i'm just feeling sorry for myself.
I doubt anyone will read this all, and i almost know no-one will take it in like i mean it to be took.
OH YEH AND THIS....MOST PEOPLE ARE MENTIONED SO READ
Really Long Survey (over 200)
Created by starsbleed2nite and taken 121984 times on Bzoink
What is your name?Stephen Edwin ChambersAre you named after anyone?Middle name was great great great....etc...grandads name.What's your screename?StarxhateWould you name a child of yours after you?God noIf you were born a member of the opposite sex what would your name be?Stephanie Marion ChambersIf you could switch names with a friend who would it be?If i HAD to? Curt cause he gets everything...Are there any mispronounciations/typos that ppl do w/ your name constantly?Stee/Steven/StephWould you drop your last name if you became famous?lol....noBasicsYour gender:MaleStraight/Gay/Bi:StraightSingle?YesIf not, do you want to be?Nice way to dump someone viat..quizBirthdate:15 October 1987Your age:17Age you act:7Age you wish you were:7Your height:*erm* 5' 9" ?Eye color:Green/YellowHappy with it?erm...i don't care reallyHair color:Brown/Black/RedHappy with it?NoLefty/righty/ambidextrous:RightyYour living arrangement:/w parents in a houseYour family:mums side only thanksHave any pets?2 dogs...but my dog died :(Whats your job?HAHA. qualified slackerPiercings?lip, had nose, but it suckedTattoos?wait till b-dayObsessions?D2X, Harry Potter, TeaAddictions?D2X, Tea, Cheese n ChipsDo you speak another language?French and a TEEENY bit of ChineseHave a favorite quote?Yes, ALL of Romeo and JulietDo you have a webpage?www.stephenchambers.tkDeep Thoughts About Life and You in itDo you live in the moment?I live in the past and for tomorrowDo you consider yourself tolerant of others?noDo you have any secrets?noDo you hate yourself?no i hate most othersDo you like your handwriting?noDo you have any bad habits?Not tidying roomWhat is the compliment you get from most people?That was amazing......(backflips) lol...If a movie was made about your life, what would it be called?How NOT to liveWhat's your biggest fear?Dying LonelyCan you sing?I think soDo you ever pretend to be someone else just to look cool?Johnny DeppAre you a loner?yesWhat are your #1 priorities in life?FunIf you were another person, would you be friends with you?NoAre you a daredevil?YesIs there anything you fear or hate about yourself?Hate is a strong word.Are you passive or agressive?Neither....Do you have a journal?...i woulda thought you'd notice....being on it and allWhat is your greatest strength and weakness?Strength=Trying Again \ Weakness=It never worksIf you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?No more spots EVERDo you think you are emotionally strong?lol noIs there anything you regret doing/not doing in life?Yes. i regret losing my virginity, i regret not kissing emDo you think life has been good so far?Upto the August last year, it couldnt have been betterWhat is the most important lesson you've learned from life?You can't win them allWhat do you like the most about your body?stomachAnd least?shouldersDo you think you are good looking?...at timesAre you confident?NO!What is the fictional character you are most like?Captain Jack SparrowAre you perceived wrongly?yes everydayDo You...Smoke?noDo drugs?noRead the newspaper?noPray?noGo to church?noTalk to strangers who IM you?yesSleep with stuffed animals?noTake walks in the rain?yesTalk to people even though you hate them?i have to reallyDrive?noLike to drive fast?noWould or Have You Ever?Liked your voice?yesHurt yourself?falling over yesBeen out of the country?noEaten something that made other people sick?marmiteBeen in love?I'd say so, but then again, i'd say no alsoDone drugs?yesGone skinny dipping?erm...not that i remember, that being said, tim had alcohol and a poolHad a medical emergency?yes x3Had surgery?yes x2Ran away from home?yesPlayed strip poker?noGotten beaten up?yesBeaten someone up?noBeen picked on?yesBeen on stage?loadsa timesSlept outdoors?yupThought about suicide?yes =(Pulled an all nighter?yup think i am tonight aswell XDIf yes, what is your record?4 daysGone one day without food?NOTalked on the phone all night?yesSlept together with the opposite sex w/o actually having sex?yesSlept all day?yesKilled someone?Emotionally Probably, Physically NoMade out with a stranger?lol yes, Rise Against GigHad sex with a stranger?NoThought you're going crazy?everydayKissed the same sex?....yes *shakes head in dissaproval*Done anything sexual with the same sex?NoBeen betrayed?Yes....so harshHad a dream that came true?A few...wierd thatBroken the law?YesMet a famous person?YesHave you ever killed an animal by accident?YesOn purpose?YesTold a secret you swore you wouldn't tell?YesStolen anything?NoBeen on radio/tv?YesBeen in a mosh-pit?lmao stupid question...at least once a weekHad a nervous breakdown?Dunno it sounds more serious than i've ever bee, i've broke down i guessBungee jumped?No...why have i started with caps all of a suddenHad a dream that kept coming back?YesBeliefsBelive in life on other planets?yepMiracles?noAstrology?kindaMagic?i wish but noGod?noSatan?noSanta?noGhosts?yep but not dead people...hyperactive imagination deficienciesLuck?yep bad and goodLove at first sight?no..attraction at first sightYin and yang (that good cant exist w/o bad)?too trueWitches?lol claire....noEaster bunny?noBelieve its possible to remain faithful forever?erm,..yeh if its rightBelieve theres a pot of gold at the end of a rainbow?noDo you wish on stars?i have done beforeDeep Theological QuestionsDo you believe in the traditional view of Heaven and Hell?noDo you think God has a gender?i dont believe in god, if there is a higher being, i wouldnt personify itDo you believe in organized religion?no, its a means of controlWhere do you think we go when we die?You ever read HDM?FriendsDo you have any gay/lesbian friends?probablyWho is your best friend?James Timothy AhernWho's the one person that knows most about you?Emily Rose BransonWhat's the best advice that anyone has ever given to you?Just Keep Skating - Tony GaleYour favourite inside joke?lol HebrewsThing you're picked on most about?Being alternativeWho's your longest known friend?Timothy Ride/ Georgina YatesNewest?Laura SimsShyest?Curt WalkerFunniest?John MatthewsSweetest?Louisa LawsonClosest?Emily Rose Brason (lol full names rock)Weirdest?Greg.....wtf is your last name gregSmartest?Emily Rose BransonDitziest?ChloeFriends you miss being close to the most?James Ahern / Emily Rose Branson / Curt WalkerLast person you talked to online?Darkyin DavidWho do you talk to most online?Curt usuallyWho are you on the phone with most?CurtWho do you trust most?Jason GormanWho listens to your problems?Jason, James, JohnWho do you fight most with?CurtWho's the nicest?LouisaWho's the most outgoing?James AhernWho's the best singer?lol....fuck....Jason cause he dares toWho's on your shit-list?No oneHave you ever thought of having sex with a friend?YepWho's your second family?The WalkersDo you always feel understood?Hardly everWho's the loudest friend?James AhernDo you trust others easily?YesWho's house were you last at?CurtsName one person who's arms you feel safe in:....this is too obvious ERBDo your friends know you?a few doFriend that lives farthest away:James AhernLove and All ThatDo you consider love a mistake?No, i consider infactuation a mistakeWhat do you find romantic?Kissing of the neck, Kissing in the rain, the right words at the tight timeTurn-on?Suspenders, Asian chicks, the crawlTurn-off?bad dress senseFirst kiss?kiss=year 3 with kirsten [lost contact] made out= last yearIf someone u had no interest in had interest in dating u how would u feel?i'd tell them. how would i feel? i wouldn't care tbhDo you prefer knowing someone before dating them or goingyesHave u ever wished it was more socially acceptable 4 a girl 2 ask a guy outYES!Have you ever been romantically attracted to someone physically unattractivyupDo you think the opposite sex finds you good looking?no, they find me as a shoulder to cry onWhat is best about the opposite sex?the way their figure goes in at the sideWhat is the worst thing about the opposite sex?missing themWhat's the last present someone gave you?Inflatable Wacken Guitar-my sisterAre you in love?NoDo you consider your significant other hot?I dont have one, if i did, i would yesWho Was the Last Person...That haunted you?EmYou wanted to kill?AaronThat you laughed at?JamesThat laughed at you?TimThat turned you on?LauraYou went shopping with?LMAO...lisaThat broke your heart?EmTo disappoint you?CurtTo ask you out?I've never been asked outTo make you cry?EmTo brighten up your day?JamesThat you thought about?GeorginaYou saw a movie with?JamesYou talked to on the phone?LouisaYou talked to through IM/ICQ?Dont use em foo!You saw?JamesYou lost?EmRight This Moment...Are you going out?was gonna go out, but fags didnt text me backWill it be with your significant other?FFS I DONT HAVE ONE YOU IDIOTOr some random person?erm, yeh everyones randomWhat are you wearing right now?boxers and glassesBody part you're touching right now:.....my elbow is touching my side.....does that turn you on?!What are you worried about right now?Failing BusinessWhat book are you reading?Harry Potter POAWhat's on your mousepad?Its a desk...infra-red mouse and all tht.Use 5 words to describe how you're feeling:Emotional,Frail, Confused,Weak,AnnoyedAre you bored?Believe me if i wasnt i wouldnt be taking this testAre you tired?NopeAre you talking to anyone online?No ones onlineAre you talking to anyone on the phone?NopeAre you lonely or content?LonelyAre you listening to music?No...but thats a damn good idea
Create a Survey | Search Surveys | Go to Bzoink