Misadventures in Hopes of Trying to Resurrect an Already Defunct Social Life
"I believe that computers have taken over the world. I believe that they have in many ways ruined our children. I believe that kids used to love to go out and play. I believe that social graces are gone because manners are gone because all people do is sit around and text. I think it's obnoxious."
- Stevie Nicks tells the Associated Press
A little off topic for the moment: Stevie Nicks is right! There is nothing organic about human interaction these days. Even as a 90's kid, growing up without texting, I've come to be so reliable on texting to communicate with friends. At times, this creates a pretty awkward situation, especially when meeting certain groups of people. Defy it, if you will, but no one seems to leave their cell phone alone for a second when socializing - I'm guilty of this, and I'll be halfway apologetic. I wouldn't be surprised if in the next 20-years babies are taught texting as their first "language". Speaking of social interactions, I've recently had the privilege to meet people from all walks of life.
In no way must this entry be taken as a bitchy, whine fest. In a conversation with Mr. Gold last night, the topic of - for lack of a better word - cliques came up. Like high school, I never really had a particular group I hung out with, so I managed - as the Class Wannabe - to try and fit in with so many groups. To be more specific, during my freshman year, I hung out with the senior class; sophomore year, I hung out with the JROTC group; junior year, I switched between the smart group of people in my class to the JROTC group; senior year, well, I was gay and just hung out with anyone I wanted to. To this day, I'm the same.
I don't belong with certain groups of people, as much as I'd like to, which creates more effort on my part to create a social calendar. It feels as though I have to remind the world that I do exist. I ask myself if that's bad, but to some degree, I don't think so. I need to find a middle-ground, and I'm beginning to realize that the middle-ground I'm seeking really is just with myself. It's too soon to say that I just don't fit in to a particular mold - I might as well just wait it out and see what happens. I like surprises. The fun part of jumping from one group to another is having the benefit of being so open-minded and adventurous. One day, it's the chill, Venice Beach group of boys I hang out with; the next is a day out in West Hollywood with an entirely energetic different group of people. It's just that more fun. The not-so-fun part is lacking the support network one needs to get through certain points in life - that one I kind of lost after relying on my best friend who moved away last year. I will admit, I'm a bit co-dependent, but for the most part I just want to get out and make friends. It feels much nicer when you have that confidant with whom word-vomit secrets can be spilled to without the after-mess.
This past weekend, I've spent it with a whole different group of people all due to a reconnection I made with a friend I havent spoken to for nine years. Mind you, my best friend was in town for the Britney Spears concert, which we went to together, only the rest of his weekend involved a Zzzzzz-fest in my bed. To sum it up, my friendship with him has changed to some degree (goodbye to social nights with him), but that doesn't mean I will stop talking to him. Disappointing? Yes. But I'm beginning to learn to just take what life throws at you. Who doesn't after dealing with the Big C?
Year 2009 has, so far, been a year of reconnecting with people and developing new friendships. Some of you know who you are, and I thank you for that. This makes life more grandeur.