A Voice
Praise be My Lord. All hail the lamb. God is great. God is good. And the chorus went on and on.
I’m not religious so church, and in particular the whole song thing at the beginning can be an uneasy thing for me. But during this particular visit on a sunny Sunday morning in December my eyes were drawn to a young girl in the first row. I didn’t get a look at her face but in my head I concluded that she was the hard-studying, piano-playing, prototypically perfect Asian daughter type. What drew me to her was the fact that while everyone else was following the Powerpoint slideshow with the lyrics, she had her eyes closed, head down and was waving her hands from side to side. The ritual went on for the full hour interrupted periodically by a loud, unabashed praising of the Big Man.
How fascinating! I believed that this girl, who I will name “Sunday Morning Melody” was an introverted never-go-out, bubble-tea-drinking junkie. But much to my amazement, she was exposing herself with the recklessness of a drunken Christmas office party. If you didn’t know she existed before, you did after you saw her. You couldn’t miss Sunday Morning Melody if you tried. And I assumed for that one hour every Sunday she got her opportunity to rise up and stand out of the crowd. She had a voice. My initial thought after I got over my surprise was one of encouragement. “Way to go” I thought, “rock on”. But while I stood there is awe of this young lady I realized that I couldn’t help feeling a little envious.
You see, 2004 has been a very anonymous year for me. While others were out buying houses and traveling to Asia and going back to school and getting married and being promoted, I did nothing of the sort. I didn’t get a bonus, a raise, or an honorable mention at the company awards. I didn’t take my sabbatical and trek through Asia. And I certainly didn’t get discovered off the street and offered a part in a movie or commercial or a reality tv anything.
Instead of accomplishing anything, I committed myself to making realtime roster updates on my EA baseball game that included every major league team and all the minor league affiliates. I did this with the diligence of Rainman for the entire major league season (effectively enough time to have a child or run across Canada). In the fall, I incorporated a healthy splash of brown and green into my wardrobe. I added this act to my bread-and-butter black and pink look and took my show to Miami, Vancouver, SF, and Toronto, never getting close to Asia as promised. Side note that I did get to go to Europe for 2 days for work but that doesn’t count for the purposes of this rant. And finally once a week I managed to put enough Pepcid AC into my body (to counteract the dreaded Asian tomato disease when drinking) that I have effectively become immune to it. In summary, if I had created a New Years resolution list for 2004, it would have gone unchecked.
For this, I must apologize for 2004. I’ve consumed a lot of resources from this great earth yet my impact was minimal. My ROI was negative. Like Simon from SNL, I watched life go by from a hotel window with nothing to show for it but prune hands. I've been as useless as tits on a boy.
Watching that girl made me realize that my Sunday morning hasn’t come around for a long time.
It is now 11 days into 2005. I’m working on some steps towards improving my outlook for this year. Small steps like this entry.
Thank you Sunday Morning Melody for the kick in the ass.
I’m not religious so church, and in particular the whole song thing at the beginning can be an uneasy thing for me. But during this particular visit on a sunny Sunday morning in December my eyes were drawn to a young girl in the first row. I didn’t get a look at her face but in my head I concluded that she was the hard-studying, piano-playing, prototypically perfect Asian daughter type. What drew me to her was the fact that while everyone else was following the Powerpoint slideshow with the lyrics, she had her eyes closed, head down and was waving her hands from side to side. The ritual went on for the full hour interrupted periodically by a loud, unabashed praising of the Big Man.
How fascinating! I believed that this girl, who I will name “Sunday Morning Melody” was an introverted never-go-out, bubble-tea-drinking junkie. But much to my amazement, she was exposing herself with the recklessness of a drunken Christmas office party. If you didn’t know she existed before, you did after you saw her. You couldn’t miss Sunday Morning Melody if you tried. And I assumed for that one hour every Sunday she got her opportunity to rise up and stand out of the crowd. She had a voice. My initial thought after I got over my surprise was one of encouragement. “Way to go” I thought, “rock on”. But while I stood there is awe of this young lady I realized that I couldn’t help feeling a little envious.
You see, 2004 has been a very anonymous year for me. While others were out buying houses and traveling to Asia and going back to school and getting married and being promoted, I did nothing of the sort. I didn’t get a bonus, a raise, or an honorable mention at the company awards. I didn’t take my sabbatical and trek through Asia. And I certainly didn’t get discovered off the street and offered a part in a movie or commercial or a reality tv anything.
Instead of accomplishing anything, I committed myself to making realtime roster updates on my EA baseball game that included every major league team and all the minor league affiliates. I did this with the diligence of Rainman for the entire major league season (effectively enough time to have a child or run across Canada). In the fall, I incorporated a healthy splash of brown and green into my wardrobe. I added this act to my bread-and-butter black and pink look and took my show to Miami, Vancouver, SF, and Toronto, never getting close to Asia as promised. Side note that I did get to go to Europe for 2 days for work but that doesn’t count for the purposes of this rant. And finally once a week I managed to put enough Pepcid AC into my body (to counteract the dreaded Asian tomato disease when drinking) that I have effectively become immune to it. In summary, if I had created a New Years resolution list for 2004, it would have gone unchecked.
For this, I must apologize for 2004. I’ve consumed a lot of resources from this great earth yet my impact was minimal. My ROI was negative. Like Simon from SNL, I watched life go by from a hotel window with nothing to show for it but prune hands. I've been as useless as tits on a boy.
Watching that girl made me realize that my Sunday morning hasn’t come around for a long time.
It is now 11 days into 2005. I’m working on some steps towards improving my outlook for this year. Small steps like this entry.
Thank you Sunday Morning Melody for the kick in the ass.