art starrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr [ you ain't a baby no more baby ]
yeah so today me + ponzo FINALLY hung out after a month of school being over..lol we're retarded. so we went to lakeside..then walked to drug fair and saw some people..got ice cream at lesbo's..haha..then we hit up the ponzo home, chilled for a while..and i walked home in this rediculous humid weather.
so basically this is the story of my life: all of my friends go away/are busy at the same time when i have absolutely nothing to do since they're not home/available. so as soon as they all get back or are free, i go away. that's just my luck. for example, ponzo is going to lbi tomorrow after just getting back from camp, and she's staying til next saturday. the next day i'm going to florida for a week. right.. so steve went to bermuda this week and i died of boredom and next week is florida...and max was uber busy this week w/ bands .. and i haven't seen irma since we went to the beach 3 weeks ago b/c she's busy w/ work and hanging out w/ kev. so then there's me. wtf.
oy vey..
but at the same time the past couple days i really just feel like being alone. it's a feeling i used to get with being really sad, but there's no sadness. i just don't really feel like talking to anyone. but i want to..i don't want to be anti-social. it's this really weird mood i'm in. and i'm listening to all depressing music lately i guess you could say..because it works with my mood and i like it anyway..i'm just into whatever it is right now..and i don't want to talk to anyone or do anything except like be happy..and i'm frustrated about stuff..but i'm not sad. i'm just...there. i don't know it's weird and hard to explain. i barely understand it. whatever, hopefully it will go away when i go to florida or before then. i don't really like it. i know that sounds retarded because you're probably thinking--what an attention-whore who's trying to sound depressed and get everyone's pity--well no. because i'm not depressed right now..and i don't know what the fuck mood i'm in and i can't control it so fuck you.
yeah! see! look at that retarded mood i'm in. jesus i don't even know what i'm saying anymore. i'm just rambling on while no one reads this journal anymore and the people who do must think i'm severely deranged. oh well. lol. what can i do?
oh yes--for those who don't know i got a new cell phone [ask me for the number or check my away message..it's probably on there..] so don't call my old number anymore--it's my mom's number now so she'll just get all annoying and tell you to call my phone. ya..
i solemnly swear that i will get over this weird mood..=)
..hopefully. ?
so basically this is the story of my life: all of my friends go away/are busy at the same time when i have absolutely nothing to do since they're not home/available. so as soon as they all get back or are free, i go away. that's just my luck. for example, ponzo is going to lbi tomorrow after just getting back from camp, and she's staying til next saturday. the next day i'm going to florida for a week. right.. so steve went to bermuda this week and i died of boredom and next week is florida...and max was uber busy this week w/ bands .. and i haven't seen irma since we went to the beach 3 weeks ago b/c she's busy w/ work and hanging out w/ kev. so then there's me. wtf.
oy vey..
but at the same time the past couple days i really just feel like being alone. it's a feeling i used to get with being really sad, but there's no sadness. i just don't really feel like talking to anyone. but i want to..i don't want to be anti-social. it's this really weird mood i'm in. and i'm listening to all depressing music lately i guess you could say..because it works with my mood and i like it anyway..i'm just into whatever it is right now..and i don't want to talk to anyone or do anything except like be happy..and i'm frustrated about stuff..but i'm not sad. i'm just...there. i don't know it's weird and hard to explain. i barely understand it. whatever, hopefully it will go away when i go to florida or before then. i don't really like it. i know that sounds retarded because you're probably thinking--what an attention-whore who's trying to sound depressed and get everyone's pity--well no. because i'm not depressed right now..and i don't know what the fuck mood i'm in and i can't control it so fuck you.
yeah! see! look at that retarded mood i'm in. jesus i don't even know what i'm saying anymore. i'm just rambling on while no one reads this journal anymore and the people who do must think i'm severely deranged. oh well. lol. what can i do?
oh yes--for those who don't know i got a new cell phone [ask me for the number or check my away message..it's probably on there..] so don't call my old number anymore--it's my mom's number now so she'll just get all annoying and tell you to call my phone. ya..
i solemnly swear that i will get over this weird mood..=)
..hopefully. ?