Life....
So.. my life right now seems in shambles... and I am utterly and totally stressed the fuck out...The man I love most in the world is in jail and because of the past year..(how he's treated me) and such I pretty much hate him. I can't seem to just let go. I want to.. but I don't know how. I want to start over... I want to be happy... but with all this malice that I'm holding towards my husband... everything is so hard. We've talked about this and he's fully aware of what he's done and wants to move on also. But today we had a very different conversation... it crushed me...... But he also said things opposite... I don't want to be anything but his wife... but he suggested that if I can't trust him and I can't let go then to just be friends... I can't be his friend... I married him... so he could be my husband... I just want it to be better.. but I donno how to let the fuck go... I need him so much... maybe that's what I should be focusing on...or just a different focal point... shit... I can't remember the last time I was this stressed out.. plus... being on the rag can't be helping much of anything. I'm gonna try to get some sleep before I go to my mother -in- laws... I'll talk to her... she always has something right to say. Defiantly need some marriage counseling... possibally even some anger management....shit... I'm so sick of the confusion and stress... Any and all advice welcome!