My Buddy
Having a foster dog is weird. Having the third dog isn't that weird part, it's more my interactions with Buddy. He is so starved for attention - he follows me around everywhere and is constantly on my lap. While I give him affection and ear rubs all the time, it's not the same. There's part of me that's not letting myself fall in love with him. I know that may sound mean, I do love Buddy - but I don't, and won't, let myself get to that stage with him. Whenever I start to feel the possibility of attachment around him, I start talking to him about how perfect his forever parents will be and how happy he will be in his new life. Brent and I also call ourselves "foster parents" to Buddy all the time - I think we just do it as a constant reminder - because saying out loud makes it more official.
Last week, I received an application for Buddy. It was such a happy/sad moment. I talked to the wife and it all felt weird. I wanted it to happen, but I didn't feel they were right. At some point I told myself I was being too critical and that no one would be good enough for Buddy, which could be right. Brent and I made arrangements to do a home visit with the couple last Sunday. I even started talking to Buddy about how people were already interested in him and wanted to love him, and he would just wag his tail and smile at me.
Saturday morning I received an e-mail from the couple saying the reconsidered. I felt relief, sadness and anger. I just looked at Buddy and told him they weren't the perfect family for him, as I tried not to cry. But I did cry, and Buddy just watched me with his cute, little face.
Fostering is the most rewarding and emotional experience I have ever been through. It's so up and down, and just, crazy. I don't want Buddy to leave, but I want him to get adopted so badly. I want it to happen soon, because I don't know how long I can keep the "he's not my dog" mentality. He really isn't my dog. But at the same time, right now, he is nobody's dog.
Last week, I received an application for Buddy. It was such a happy/sad moment. I talked to the wife and it all felt weird. I wanted it to happen, but I didn't feel they were right. At some point I told myself I was being too critical and that no one would be good enough for Buddy, which could be right. Brent and I made arrangements to do a home visit with the couple last Sunday. I even started talking to Buddy about how people were already interested in him and wanted to love him, and he would just wag his tail and smile at me.
Saturday morning I received an e-mail from the couple saying the reconsidered. I felt relief, sadness and anger. I just looked at Buddy and told him they weren't the perfect family for him, as I tried not to cry. But I did cry, and Buddy just watched me with his cute, little face.
Fostering is the most rewarding and emotional experience I have ever been through. It's so up and down, and just, crazy. I don't want Buddy to leave, but I want him to get adopted so badly. I want it to happen soon, because I don't know how long I can keep the "he's not my dog" mentality. He really isn't my dog. But at the same time, right now, he is nobody's dog.