something Lisa wrote that scares me

[absent_inside]

no feelings causes death of the mind
in the hollow space that once was something
and is now left to rot
as my heart is torn from my flesh
to be ravished by the dogs of hell
because I deserve no one
for I caused more pain to the person
who lessened my emptiness
and eased my discontent
and now I have thrown his ashes
to the sewers to accumulate and decompose
with the amoebas of the shit
that lies beneath the world of the blind
for no one can see what I have caused
or that I am a murderer
The world moves along with its fast food
and overpriced merchandise
and fake idols that people worship
and I'm told to enjoy
enjoy what?
I'd rather be floating down the pipes
with the remains of the one I loved
oh so long ago
4 years ago I was asked to follow
and now I think it's time