The Giant Penny and the Penny Plunderer: the enduring legacy of a loser villain
Like many or perhaps even most comics fans, there was a time when I naturally assumed that the giant penny in the Batcave was--alongside the robot T-Rex and the big Joker playing card--a trophy from some previous clash with Two-Face. Well, either that or the time the Joker dressed up as Simple Simon and used a giant penny to try busting open a bank
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And thus, we have the only villain alive to swear vengeance upon currency.
HOW DO YOU LIKE IT NOW, PENNIES?!
In the DCnU, Coyne's hatred for pennies will be revealed by having him rape a prostitute that he's dressed up like Abraham Lincoln and slathered with copper-colored body paint. Because it would be too subtle otherwise. Also, reference will be made to the Tea Party, to indicate how relevant the DCnU's superheroes are to the real world, but in a way that manages to completely miss the point.
So yeah, near as I can tell, the giant penny never actually belonged to the Penny Plunderer himself!
So Batman just fucking waltzed off with one of the very same pieces of property that he was ostensibly protecting from being stolen, for no other reason than to use it as a trophy? Holy shit, how does that even work? That'd be like Sherlock Holmes walking away with the Crown Jewels after a job well done for Queen Victoria.
"The stout door is bolted - and the two crime-fighters are alone with death!"
Oh, for fuck's sake. He's one of those bad guys:
"I'm going to leave them alone and not actually witness them dying. I'm just going to assume it all went according to plan."
Then again, in the time that it took Batman to MacGyver up a goddamn Baghdad battery, he could have used his obviously overpowered leg muscles to simply break down the door, especially since that's exactly what they wind up doing anyway, but then, I have to remind myself that this story is taking place in a parallel universe where newborns are dropped on their heads right after being spanked at birth.
What's the moral to come away from the pathetic plight of the Penny Plunderer?
Just a thought, but if the final step in your master plan requires that you have access to a land-line telephone (and wow, THAT'S an angle to this story that's arguably aged even WORSE than the conceit of a criminal career triggered by pennies), make sure you find out beforehand a) if it&'s a payphone and b) if you have the exact change required.
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I don't think Joe Coyne is all that contrived. Now, if the Penny Plunderer had been a girl named Penelope Farthing...
--Henchgirl
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PENELOPE FARTHING WILL BE REVEALED TO BE JOE COYNE'S DAUGHTER, WHO WAS CONCEIVED BY RAPE, AND WHO INHERITED HIS HATRED OF SMALL-DENOMINATION COINS WHEN SHE WAS SEXUALLY ASSAULTED WITH A ROLL OF THEM
BECAUSE THE NEW 52 IS FOR KIDS
... Okay, so maybe it won't be the Penny Plunderer, but I bet you a million dollars that at least one DCnU villain will be revealed to have DRAMATIC RAPE as part of their motivating backstory.
Right now, my money's on Suicide Girl Harley.
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Holy shit, how does that even work?
Well, as that same Seanbaby article showed us, Commissioner Gordon used to be all, "No, no, please take my crime scene evidence! You deserve it!"
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[DIDIO] RAPE MAKES EVERYTHING BETTER [/DIDIO]
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