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[aloneinanguish]

I'm in a truly shitty situation. I have a three month old and a 5 year old. Afetr my 3 month old was born, my boyfriend and I had sex ONE TIME without a condom. And guess who's pregnant again. I can not have another baby. Even if I gave it up for adoption, which I don't think I could do, my boyfriend would leave me and my mother would throw me out

Comments

[jessie_730]

First of all, I'm very sorry that you have to go through this. It's normal to be scared- it's not exactly "fun" to have an abortion. But, before I had mine, I found that talking to other women who have had them helped me greatly in easing my fear. I'm more than happy to answer your questions.

After you had an abortion, how did you feel- emotionally and physically?
-- Physically, the worst part about the whole thing was the spot on my hand where they put the iv for the anesthesia in. I only had cramping when I first woke up, and I did not bleed heavily. I was up and about that same day. Emotionally, I did go up and down. At first I was fine, then I went through a period of depression. Now, almost 8 months later, I am comfortable with my decision and know that there was no other option.

What kind of abortion did you have?
-MVA- manual vacuum aspiration, with general anesthesia. I was 8 weeks along.

Was it painful?
- Honestly, no. I had period like cramps when I FIRST woke up but they stopped shortly after I was permitted to get up and get dressed.

How long couldn't you really do anything afterwards?
- I was groggy for about 45 minutes after waking up from the anesthesia, then got a milk shake from McDonalds because I was starving. I went home and rested for 2 hours, then got up, got dressed, and went grocery shopping with my mom and sisters. I felt absolutely fine.

Do you have any feelings of regret now?
- No. My would have been due date was a couple weeks ago- and passing that was really a turning point for me. I finally realized "ok, had I not done this, I would have a baby RIGHT NOW." I can now see, without any doubt, that the abortion was the right thing to do.

Did you have those feelings at the beginning?
- At the beginning, i did go through a period of depression and regret. I was having trouble with my then boyfriend, the one who had gotten me pregnant, and I remember that I kept thinking "if i hadn't let him talk me into the abortion i wouldnt feel so alone, i'd have my baby in a few months and everything would be great". Well, it wouldn't have been great, and I am SO glad that I went through with the abortion. I am completely at ease with my decision now.

If you had the surgical kind (which is what I'm having) did you take the valium? Did it make you feel high or sick?
- Valium wasn't offered to me. And I wasn't in pain- I wouldn't have needed it.

If you could go back and do it differently, would you?
- No. I struggled in my mind with that question for months afterwards. And finally, I decided that no- I wouldn't do it differently. This is the way it had to be- I'm not even 17 years old. I am not at a point in my life where I could be a mother- it wouldn't have been fair to me, the child, my family, or my ex and his family. There is just no way that it would have worked out. That abortion was honestly the best decision I have ever made, and I would definately not do it any differently.

Good luck- if I can be of any more help, don't hesitate to ask.

[aloneinanguish]

Thank you. I don't know if I'm having the same thing. They called it something curettage (I think suction curettage). My friend Nick told me to get knocked out for it because he said if I'm awake I will see everything, but I'm afraid I won't wake up. Did you have that fear? They said they generally give a valium beforehand, but if I feel high I get panic attacks. Plus, I'm not allowed to eat after midnight the night before, and I'm afraid I'll get sick.

Thank you for sharing your story with me.

[jessie_730]

I was a little nervous about being knocked out. But I'm so glad that I went that route. I believe they give a valium before only if you're just having local anesthesia- which means you're awake for the whole thing, they just numb your cervix. Personally, the thought of being awake for the whole thing scared the hell out of me, so even though I was nervous about the general anesthesia, I decided I'd rather be unaware of what's going on. What time is your appointment? Mine was at 8:30 am, so not eating after midnight wasn't really a big deal for me since I don't always eat breakfast anyway. You'll probably be too nervous to feel sick from hunger- I know I was.

[aloneinanguish]

My appointment is at 9 am. I probably won't feel sick from hunger, but I'm nervous about the drugs making me sick.

[jessie_730]

They might. : / I didn't get sick, but some women do. When you wake up, the clinic will probably give you a gourmet snack of saltine crackers and ginger ale- my clinic did, and 3 girls I know had the same thing at different clinics. My tummy did feel a little weird from the anesthesia, but the ginger ale helped to settle it.