(no subject)
I've been doing some thinking. What I've been doing.. complaining and whinning.. it wasn't right. It wasn't fair. I've worried so many people only to just jump back with no explanation. I haven't been very considerate to you. So I fully apologize.
I realize. I can't live my life like this. Constantly complaining about what goes on with my life and expect my friends to always pick me up. I can't expect to let things get any better if I don't take matters into my own hands. Nothing will be achieved if I sit back. Nothing good will happen if I simply sit there and wait. Not anymore.
All this self loathing, self destruction, hating and grieving over myself? It's over. This is the end.
How can I talk about ending my life so freely when there are people out there who struggle just stay alive? How can I be so selfish as to say that I hate my life when there are children out there who are just grateful to find a scrape of meat on th ground?
I can't expect to have a happy live when I don't rightfully deserve one. Not saying I don't deserve to live but.. I haven't done anything to deserve happiness. When all I do is woe and feel sorry for myself? No. That's not going to get me anywhere.
Things are going to happen. People aren't going to like me. I may even lose friends. My bridge will collapse. My trees may fall. But I'm going to rebuild. I'm going to plant the seeds again.
Hahaha. I've made these types of posts before haven't I. Saying the same thing yet not going in the right direction.
But I swear. This is a new chapter. I know... I can't be happy and expect to make my friends happy if I'm down. Whether I know it or not, people look up to me. And I have to acknowledge their love and belief in me. I promise to make myself happy before I do anything else. I will look to you when I need guidance for I am not wise enough to take on the world alone.
However.. this isn't only for me alone.
I want to change the world. I want to make it a better place for people to live. I want to help spread happiness across the world. Everyone deserves happiness. My family.. my friends.. your friends.. your family.. everyone!
No matter what happens. I believe everyone has the right to be happy and I'll make sure that it happens. Even if I have to do it alone--
No. I don't. I know you'll be with me. I know you all want to help. I know your warmth and love will help make this world bright for everyone, young and old.
We have to do this together, everyone. The world won't change overnight, and it can't be done by one person alone. So we have to do all that we can. Something small may not be much help but if we join our efforts together.. a miracle can happen.
I want to make a miracle happen. And I want you guys to help me.
I have this idea in mind... it's like a pay it foward kind of thing.
Project: Spread the Smile! That's what I want to call it!
To make one person smile. Do one good deed.. something to make one person happy. Doesn't have to be anything big. Listen to someone's problem. Cheer someone up. Play with your younger sister. Anything. If I can do that every day.. then that might inspire more people to do the same!
Can I ask you to help me with this? It's not something I can expect everyone to do. But to think of what would happen if everyone did it... can you imagine how many people would be happy?
Again, I can't expect everyone to help.. but I want to at least share my Project: Spread the Smile! idea. I should make some sort of graphic for it.
I'm going to leave this public because I want to know what everyone thinks. Please spread this around.
If I can reach to a good number of people.. I can at least try to make a difference.
I realize. I can't live my life like this. Constantly complaining about what goes on with my life and expect my friends to always pick me up. I can't expect to let things get any better if I don't take matters into my own hands. Nothing will be achieved if I sit back. Nothing good will happen if I simply sit there and wait. Not anymore.
All this self loathing, self destruction, hating and grieving over myself? It's over. This is the end.
How can I talk about ending my life so freely when there are people out there who struggle just stay alive? How can I be so selfish as to say that I hate my life when there are children out there who are just grateful to find a scrape of meat on th ground?
I can't expect to have a happy live when I don't rightfully deserve one. Not saying I don't deserve to live but.. I haven't done anything to deserve happiness. When all I do is woe and feel sorry for myself? No. That's not going to get me anywhere.
Things are going to happen. People aren't going to like me. I may even lose friends. My bridge will collapse. My trees may fall. But I'm going to rebuild. I'm going to plant the seeds again.
Hahaha. I've made these types of posts before haven't I. Saying the same thing yet not going in the right direction.
But I swear. This is a new chapter. I know... I can't be happy and expect to make my friends happy if I'm down. Whether I know it or not, people look up to me. And I have to acknowledge their love and belief in me. I promise to make myself happy before I do anything else. I will look to you when I need guidance for I am not wise enough to take on the world alone.
However.. this isn't only for me alone.
I want to change the world. I want to make it a better place for people to live. I want to help spread happiness across the world. Everyone deserves happiness. My family.. my friends.. your friends.. your family.. everyone!
No matter what happens. I believe everyone has the right to be happy and I'll make sure that it happens. Even if I have to do it alone--
No. I don't. I know you'll be with me. I know you all want to help. I know your warmth and love will help make this world bright for everyone, young and old.
We have to do this together, everyone. The world won't change overnight, and it can't be done by one person alone. So we have to do all that we can. Something small may not be much help but if we join our efforts together.. a miracle can happen.
I want to make a miracle happen. And I want you guys to help me.
I have this idea in mind... it's like a pay it foward kind of thing.
Project: Spread the Smile! That's what I want to call it!
To make one person smile. Do one good deed.. something to make one person happy. Doesn't have to be anything big. Listen to someone's problem. Cheer someone up. Play with your younger sister. Anything. If I can do that every day.. then that might inspire more people to do the same!
Can I ask you to help me with this? It's not something I can expect everyone to do. But to think of what would happen if everyone did it... can you imagine how many people would be happy?
Again, I can't expect everyone to help.. but I want to at least share my Project: Spread the Smile! idea. I should make some sort of graphic for it.
I'm going to leave this public because I want to know what everyone thinks. Please spread this around.
If I can reach to a good number of people.. I can at least try to make a difference.