Yayyy
My good friend Brooks came home from South Carolina today! I'm so happy to see him I have missed him and the fam so much!
Bubba Gumps hasnt called me or Diana back yet. Annoy. I really want something new. Its alright though I guess, we'll just keep tryin.
Just FYI, Brent and I finally made out two days ago. (How gay are we lol..) I thought I would make a note of it so three months from now I can look back and be like, 'yep see, three months ago was the last time we made out, we're about due for another.'
I don't know if I am happy anymore.... Like, I like him as a person, and he can be sweet and kind, but our relationship just isnt the same. I really am reconsidering this as being "just a phase" because it seems to be an awfully long phase. I dont think I could do it though. I dont know what I would do if I didnt have him. I would have nothing... No friends. No one to call up just to say hi/bye to for no reason. No one to go out with.
I seriously thought about this. Without Brent, here is my life:
I wouldn't talk to Ian much anymore even though we're like good friends now, bc the 'bros before hoes' rule. Same with Brandon Warner. We're not bffl or anything, but I like having them as friends and I know that we wouldnt be if Brent was not in my life. I would sit at home and do nothing all the time (like I have been recently it seems.....) because I am lacking in the friend department. Diana is ALWAYS with Sarah. Granted, theyre 'married' (lol) so what can ya do? Same with Carly, they dont like together now so its not the same ish, but I pretty much just see her Tues/Thursday when we drive to school togeth. Paige? like MIA. I see her once in a blue moon it seems now that she lives over by UCF. Jessica has been acting funny since her and Jon broke up. I feel like I havent seen her in weeks, and even when we do plan to hang out, she never keeps it. Everyone else I used to talk to lives at LEAST 3 hours away. Like I am seriously out of options here. Without Brent, my life would possibly be even more boring and friendless than it is now. And it is SO sad that I am pretty much staying in a relationship because I just dont want to be alone.... Sweet life. What am I supposed to do?
I really need to get over myself and wake up. I am usually the type of person who gets bored with a guy after 2 or 3 months because things become so routine, and things never used to be with us. Maybe that is why we've lost it. I am going to go think for a little bit about what needs to be done here, and if we really want to save this relationship, I need to write some things down that I want to change, and so does he, because clearly we have grown apart and that is not what I want! :( I do really care about him and the thought of us not being together is scary for me. I dono why I am having such a hard time trying to make up my mind about this.....
Bubba Gumps hasnt called me or Diana back yet. Annoy. I really want something new. Its alright though I guess, we'll just keep tryin.
Just FYI, Brent and I finally made out two days ago. (How gay are we lol..) I thought I would make a note of it so three months from now I can look back and be like, 'yep see, three months ago was the last time we made out, we're about due for another.'
I don't know if I am happy anymore.... Like, I like him as a person, and he can be sweet and kind, but our relationship just isnt the same. I really am reconsidering this as being "just a phase" because it seems to be an awfully long phase. I dont think I could do it though. I dont know what I would do if I didnt have him. I would have nothing... No friends. No one to call up just to say hi/bye to for no reason. No one to go out with.
I seriously thought about this. Without Brent, here is my life:
I wouldn't talk to Ian much anymore even though we're like good friends now, bc the 'bros before hoes' rule. Same with Brandon Warner. We're not bffl or anything, but I like having them as friends and I know that we wouldnt be if Brent was not in my life. I would sit at home and do nothing all the time (like I have been recently it seems.....) because I am lacking in the friend department. Diana is ALWAYS with Sarah. Granted, theyre 'married' (lol) so what can ya do? Same with Carly, they dont like together now so its not the same ish, but I pretty much just see her Tues/Thursday when we drive to school togeth. Paige? like MIA. I see her once in a blue moon it seems now that she lives over by UCF. Jessica has been acting funny since her and Jon broke up. I feel like I havent seen her in weeks, and even when we do plan to hang out, she never keeps it. Everyone else I used to talk to lives at LEAST 3 hours away. Like I am seriously out of options here. Without Brent, my life would possibly be even more boring and friendless than it is now. And it is SO sad that I am pretty much staying in a relationship because I just dont want to be alone.... Sweet life. What am I supposed to do?
I really need to get over myself and wake up. I am usually the type of person who gets bored with a guy after 2 or 3 months because things become so routine, and things never used to be with us. Maybe that is why we've lost it. I am going to go think for a little bit about what needs to be done here, and if we really want to save this relationship, I need to write some things down that I want to change, and so does he, because clearly we have grown apart and that is not what I want! :( I do really care about him and the thought of us not being together is scary for me. I dono why I am having such a hard time trying to make up my mind about this.....