Goddamned meat suit and big lies about biology
I don't get PMS, although I do experience physical exhaustion and pain when my period's about to start. I do however, have fucking crazy times when I ovulate. I feel better now that I know what's behind these feelings, but that doesn't stop it being inconvenient to suddenly get reckless and hyper, feel a sudden craving for melodrama and become distractingly boy crrrrrrrazy once a month. Also, knowing that I'm hormonally stoned doesn't make it any less of a struggle to avoid doing the colossally stupid things my brain is suggesting. Or to keep my mind focused when some dude with a Dorian Gray level face or architectural shoulders is standing by me on public transport and I want to bite him.
I don't exactly know why I'm posting about this (other than to let of steam about it) except that learning these things about myself makes me realise how dumb and limited sex and gender education is, and how it enshrines restrictive stories about 'men' and 'women' that alienate people from themselves. I was told certain things about how 'women' are affected by hormones (scare quotes because not all women experience these hormonal changes, and not all who experience them are women). Those things (the narrative of PMS, etc) were convenient to support a view of women as hormonally volatile in a sad, vulnerable way, and as distinct from men who were both consistent (meaning trustworthy) and agressive/active (meaning they couldn't be expected to control themselves). Not acknowledging that some (many?) women experience hormonal recklessness and impulsivity and yet manage to keep it to themselves and not catcall, pinch, goose and leer their way through life as many men feel they must be allowed to do, because 'biology'. Also leaving out the inconvenient fact that not all men do experience this supposed hormonal/biological birthright of theirs and actually don't spend their lives wanting to flap their weiners in the breeze and harass women. That the guys who do those things are not living up to some kind of 'boys will be boys' tenet of biology, but rather revealing that they are jerkfaced turds with entitlement issues.
I dunno, I'm torn between the fact that I value my privacy in a lot of ways and I don't really enjoy talking about intimate stuff...but I also feel like I've suffered in life because I wasn't part of enough discussions about the variety of people's experiences of gender and sexuality - that I was denied a lot of important information - and that I'm far from the only one.
I don't exactly know why I'm posting about this (other than to let of steam about it) except that learning these things about myself makes me realise how dumb and limited sex and gender education is, and how it enshrines restrictive stories about 'men' and 'women' that alienate people from themselves. I was told certain things about how 'women' are affected by hormones (scare quotes because not all women experience these hormonal changes, and not all who experience them are women). Those things (the narrative of PMS, etc) were convenient to support a view of women as hormonally volatile in a sad, vulnerable way, and as distinct from men who were both consistent (meaning trustworthy) and agressive/active (meaning they couldn't be expected to control themselves). Not acknowledging that some (many?) women experience hormonal recklessness and impulsivity and yet manage to keep it to themselves and not catcall, pinch, goose and leer their way through life as many men feel they must be allowed to do, because 'biology'. Also leaving out the inconvenient fact that not all men do experience this supposed hormonal/biological birthright of theirs and actually don't spend their lives wanting to flap their weiners in the breeze and harass women. That the guys who do those things are not living up to some kind of 'boys will be boys' tenet of biology, but rather revealing that they are jerkfaced turds with entitlement issues.
I dunno, I'm torn between the fact that I value my privacy in a lot of ways and I don't really enjoy talking about intimate stuff...but I also feel like I've suffered in life because I wasn't part of enough discussions about the variety of people's experiences of gender and sexuality - that I was denied a lot of important information - and that I'm far from the only one.