It's funny because I was just thinking about the time when we went for "that bike ride" when you were about..oh 9 or 10..I can't remember for sure..but you know what time I'm talking about. I know you do. Just think for a minute.
Need some help? Fine. Lame ass. I always have to do everything for you. **sigh**
Well, we were headed off to the sand pit to roll down the hills in the dirt like giant fleas and watch the shapes in the clouds while laying on our backs and drinking Pepsi big gulps and eating Smart Food popcorn, you know, the usual, when you swerved wrong on your pink powder puff bicycle and fell over on your left side.
You ended up with a good sized gash in your knee and when you saw the blood you started shrieking like a banshee on crack. Again with the usual. haha
Anyhoo I thought it would be funny to pretend I was possessed and had caused your fall with my mind skills...probably a bad call on my part but fucking hilarious.
I kind of stalked over to you and dropped to the ground and then licked the blood off of your knee and was all NOW YOU BELONG TO ME MUHAHAHA!! You started backing away from me but you were tangled up in your bike and only managed to slam the handles into your head.
I started laughing and you continued to cry while you untangled yourself and tried to run away. It took me about five seconds to catch up to you seeing as you couldn't do much more than limp and I finally convinced you I wasn't really possessed. I told you some stupid joke about talking boobs and you just knew I was me. The devil doesn't have a dorky sense of humor or some such. Some insane logic that worked on you at any rate.
You were pretty mad at me but I gave you the rest of my Pepsi and the pack of Gonzo Grape Bubblicious gum I had gotten at the store that morning before we set out and you let it go at that. We cleaned up your leg and walked our bikes back home and you went in and milked the gash for all it was worth..fucking baby..but you got some cookie dough ice cream out of it so maybe you were the smart one after all.
I do still have the scar, and you're still the only one who has ever proposed marriage to it.
Which reminds me of the time I woke up to find you making out with my nose. Tongue and nibbling and everything. Claim you were sleepwalking all you want; I know better. And you wonder why I haven't been to your house since then.
Pfffffffttt. Just because I acted out my fantasies on you doesn't mean I was awake. God, Erin. Take a psych class.
I don't wonder..I know the truth..you fucking LURVVVVVEEDDD it..now you're afraid of what that might mean. Don't need to be though. You're not gay..you're just horny all the time :)
ps..my story was better than theirs **points below** NEENER!!
Need some help? Fine. Lame ass. I always have to do everything for you. **sigh**
Well, we were headed off to the sand pit to roll down the hills in the dirt like giant fleas and watch the shapes in the clouds while laying on our backs and drinking Pepsi big gulps and eating Smart Food popcorn, you know, the usual, when you swerved wrong on your pink powder puff bicycle and fell over on your left side.
You ended up with a good sized gash in your knee and when you saw the blood you started shrieking like a banshee on crack. Again with the usual. haha
Anyhoo I thought it would be funny to pretend I was possessed and had caused your fall with my mind skills...probably a bad call on my part but fucking hilarious.
I kind of stalked over to you and dropped to the ground and then licked the blood off of your knee and was all NOW YOU BELONG TO ME MUHAHAHA!! You started backing away from me but you were tangled up in your bike and only managed to slam the handles into your head.
I started laughing and you continued to cry while you untangled yourself and tried to run away. It took me about five seconds to catch up to you seeing as you couldn't do much more than limp and I finally convinced you I wasn't really possessed. I told you some stupid joke about talking boobs and you just knew I was me. The devil doesn't have a dorky sense of humor or some such. Some insane logic that worked on you at any rate.
You were pretty mad at me but I gave you the rest of my Pepsi and the pack of Gonzo Grape Bubblicious gum I had gotten at the store that morning before we set out and you let it go at that. We cleaned up your leg and walked our bikes back home and you went in and milked the gash for all it was worth..fucking baby..but you got some cookie dough ice cream out of it so maybe you were the smart one after all.
I wonder..do you still have the scar?
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I do still have the scar, and you're still the only one who has ever proposed marriage to it.
Which reminds me of the time I woke up to find you making out with my nose. Tongue and nibbling and everything. Claim you were sleepwalking all you want; I know better. And you wonder why I haven't been to your house since then.
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I don't wonder..I know the truth..you fucking LURVVVVVEEDDD it..now you're afraid of what that might mean. Don't need to be though. You're not gay..you're just horny all the time :)
ps..my story was better than theirs **points below** NEENER!!
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