This shits me to tears.
Just give me a break for fucks sake!
Thrown in the deep end again. A class full of "experts".
They can't get me on the course with the beginners on this instrument and in the field of haematology, so I'm thrown in the deep end in the advanced class. That's fine. But I need to grow a spine and say, "Get out of my way and give me a go".
The "experts" hijack the class and the trainer lets them. When hands on time comes around, the "experts" jump straight onto the instruments, and I'm too polite to but in. Then when they think they have it down pat and an instrument is available for me to have a go, the trainer decides it's time to move to the next topic. What chance do I have?
I need to grow up. I need to just do it. Learn it. But I just want to give it all in and say it's all too hard. I have to suck it up.
Happy birthday. Bullshit.
I guess it shows they have faith in me.
I want to be an instrument trainer, and I'll be getting trained in being one if a few weeks time. I hope I don't make the mistakes that have been made here. Or is all this just my fault? This isn't kindergarden. No-one should have to hold my hand and help me learn this stuff.
Am I just looking for an excuse? A reason why? Something to blame for not being able to pick this up easily? Am I just dumb and trying to hide the fact? People keep telling me how impressed they are with me, but I can't see why? I'm a timid, spineless, useless winger. A no hoper.
I'm going to have another glass of wine now. I've only had 1 so far, but I have the rest of a bottle to go...
Abs.
Thrown in the deep end again. A class full of "experts".
They can't get me on the course with the beginners on this instrument and in the field of haematology, so I'm thrown in the deep end in the advanced class. That's fine. But I need to grow a spine and say, "Get out of my way and give me a go".
The "experts" hijack the class and the trainer lets them. When hands on time comes around, the "experts" jump straight onto the instruments, and I'm too polite to but in. Then when they think they have it down pat and an instrument is available for me to have a go, the trainer decides it's time to move to the next topic. What chance do I have?
I need to grow up. I need to just do it. Learn it. But I just want to give it all in and say it's all too hard. I have to suck it up.
Happy birthday. Bullshit.
I guess it shows they have faith in me.
I want to be an instrument trainer, and I'll be getting trained in being one if a few weeks time. I hope I don't make the mistakes that have been made here. Or is all this just my fault? This isn't kindergarden. No-one should have to hold my hand and help me learn this stuff.
Am I just looking for an excuse? A reason why? Something to blame for not being able to pick this up easily? Am I just dumb and trying to hide the fact? People keep telling me how impressed they are with me, but I can't see why? I'm a timid, spineless, useless winger. A no hoper.
I'm going to have another glass of wine now. I've only had 1 so far, but I have the rest of a bottle to go...
Abs.